Through others we become ourselves.
Lev S. Vygotsky
Not sure about you, but the past month or so have been a challenging wintry mix that included my experiencing a short bout with Covid, a heartbreaking playoff defeat by my beloved Buffalo Bills, the painful extraction of two problem molars and a wobbly eye tooth (implants on the way!), and the gaining of more than a few pounds brought on by a staple of starch-heavy, chew-friendly meals, i.e. appetizer – mashed potatoes, entrée – macaroni and cheese, desert – double fudge sundae sans peanuts.
For those who may not know, and/or have a life that does not center on TV, “Tommy,” played by Irish actor Cillian Murphy, is the head of the Peaky Blinders, a violent, criminal organization operating and gaining strength in Brittan after World War I (1919). The spine of the series is based on history – there was such a gang during that period, getting their name from members’ stitching disposable razor blades into the peaks of their flat caps, which could then be used as weapons. But the show blends more fiction than fact into the storyline, and Tommy comes out of the mix somewhere between Tony Soprano and James Dean’s “Jim Stark” in Rebel Without a Cause. Tommy is a tortured and touching villain, an anti-hero with a kind heart for the right cause, a survivor of the great war, and a chain-smoker deluxe who is all about family – both supporting them, and using them, to personal advantage.
But Tommy is also a pragmatic philosopher, a creator of cutting koans, a smart and sincere crime boss who never lets go the chance to weave wisdom into threat. Screenrant.com describes Tommy’s oratory style as a “penchant for infusing creativity into his sentences…Whether he’s talking to a family member, a high-ranking government official, or a foe, a dialogue scene involving the Birmingham crime boss is never bland.”
Here’s a few of Tommy’s “killer” lines as listed on the site:
“Good Taste Is For People Who Can’t Afford Sapphires.”
“When Fortune Drops Something Valuable Into Your Lap, You Don’t Just Dump It On The Bank Of The Cut.”
“You Don’t Parley When You’re On The Back Foot.”
“I Don’t Pay For Suits. My Suits Are On The House Or The House Burns Down.”
The problem (or perhaps the non-problem) is that I seldom encounter a conversational situation fraught with enough tension or complexity to effectively emulate Tommy. Save for the occasional parking ticket, I’d like to think I’m law abiding. My only real foes are the squirrels that poach peaches from my trees, and as for smoking cigarettes, two puffs, inhaling or not, sends me into a three-day coughing fit.
So I’m resided to fling my verbal fantasies against the mundane, and usually about the home, for instance when my ever-patient wife asks me to take out the garbage: “Trash…if only I could toss into the bin of life the pain of dental bills, eh?”
Or alone, driving in the car and listening to the radio, answering aloud the random commercial: “Side effects you say…well, mate, potential good always comes with potential bad, such as irritability, drowsiness and drooling.”
My solace in all this is I’m not on the verge of a psychotic break. In fact, according to frequent column contributor Jason Kurtz, a leading psychoanalyst, memoirist (Follow the Joy), and award winning playwright, my mimicking of Tommy can be explained by the “Mirror Neuron.” He expounds:
“This is a neuron that fires both when we perform an action, and also when we observe that action performed by another. It’s part of why we love to watch sports. When we see Tom Brady throw the winning touchdown – or toss the game losing interception – we feel as if it actually happened to us. We feel the elation of the score, and the dejection of the interception. Similarly, when we pretend to be James Bond, or Harry Potter, we feel the kinds of feelings we imagine those characters feel. We can feel as tough as Bond, or clever and brave as Harry. We borrow from them qualities we want for ourselves, and in doing so, we actually feel those qualities. In this way, we teach ourselves how to be more like the kind of person we admire, and thereby learn how to become a better version of ourselves.”
Taking what Jason says, what is it about Tommy Shelby, what qualities about his character, do I admire and want for myself? It’s a good question to ask of myself, and a deep one. It will take some time to figure out, but off the top of my head, or the tip of my subconscious, I’d say the answer is confidence. Tommy is not cocky or arrogant, but he is sure of himself. He is decisive and willing to take risks, and is fearless in the face of those who look unfavorably on his decisiveness and willingness to take risks. Basically, Tommy is his own man, and moves forward, step by step, on the solid footing of one who might not be 100 percent sure they are right, but 100 percent sure they have the right not to be right.
I, on the other hand, still worry what others think of me, including what I write, backing away from taking a strong stand on the side of an issue that might be deemed “politically incorrect” or counters the mainstream position. I am particularly shy from posting such dissent on social media, fearing ridicule and scorn. Sadly, the threat is real. One only has to set virtual foot on Twitter, Facebook or other sharing platforms to see the digital vitriol hurled from human to human, a slew of hateful, and, I believe, desperate, dialogue-ending comments. As Socrates said, when words were chiseled upon tablets made of stone and not glowing screens fueled by chips: “When the debate is lost, slander is the tool for the loser.”
But through my fandom of Tommy Shelby, and with the start of a new season on Netflix later this month, I hope I can find the courage to be more like him – to reveal more of myself that is true, to share more of myself that is authentic, and to live in the present without fear of how it might impact my future. Maybe the first step is to get a Peaky Blinder haircut, the buzz on the sides and back, long atop locks look. Unfortunately, that might be out of my control, being my age and a forehead that grows daily by leaps and bounds. But I can try it out no matter what others think. I mean, it’s me who’s looking into the mirror. Right?
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Image West Midlands Police
on Flickr with CC License
