The United States military is just as fearful of the inevitable zombie apocalypse as you are.
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That’s why, along with its plans for what to do should the president be kidnapped by aliens or if the earth’s core explodes, the Defense Department has a detailed list of steps to be taken in the event of the undead murdering everything in sight.
Foreign Policy has obtained an unclassified document titled “CONOP 888″ that explains how the military would “preserve the sanctity of human life” while under attack from zombies.
This plan fulfills fictional contingency planning guidance tasking for U.S. Strategic Command to develop a comprehensive [plan] to undertake military operations to preserve ‘non-zombie’ humans from the threats posed by a zombie horde.
Because zombies pose a threat to all non-zombie human life, [Strategic Command] will be prepared to preserve the sanctity of human life and conduct operations in support of any human population — including traditional adversaries.
Dated April 30, CONOP 888, or “Counter-Zombie Dominance,” seems like a joke, but its authors were well-aware of this reaction, which is why they wrote in the disclaimer section: “this plan was not actually designed as a joke.”
According to Foreign Policy, military planners in 2009 and 2010 were debating new ideas for fictional training tools that could never be mistaken for a real plan by the general public.
Navy Capt. Pamela Kunze, a spokeswoman for US Strategic Command in Nevada, revealed that the plan is merely a training exercise devised to prevent any worry that a real crisis is at hand. In an email to Foreign Policy, she explained,
The document is identified as a training tool used in an in-house training exercise where students learn about the basic concepts of military plans and order development through a fictional training scenario. This document is not a U.S. Strategic Command plan.
The essential steps of the plan are rather predictable. They discuss a “vigilant defense condition” to protect mankind, as well as the development of “operations that will, if directed, eradicate zombie threats to human safety.”
The only real surprise is how much imagination went into the possible different types of zombies.
The plan lists vegetarian zombies, which “pose no direct threat to humans because they only eat plant life,” evil magic zombies that were “created via some form of occult experimentation” and even chicken zombies, or “CZs.”
These could not be left out because, according to the plan, “this is actually the only proven class of zombie that actually exists.”
Apparently, zombie chickens are born when old hens that can no longer produce eggs are euthanized by farmers and sometimes wake up after they’ve been buried. CONOP 8888 says,
CZs are simply terrifying to behold and are likely only to make people become vegetarians in protest to animal cruelty.
Then there are zombies from outer space, zombies created by some deranged doctor and, of course, a simple pathogen that turns humans into flesh-eating monsters.
The rest of the plan discusses how to “restore civil authority” along with making sure there are no other remaining “zombie holdouts.”
So, while the military may not actually view the zombie apocalypse as a reality, it’s good to know that they at least possess the creative minds to hash out, at depth, the consequences of such a situation.
via Foreign Policy
This post originally appeared at Elite Daily. Reprinted with permission.
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SEAN LEVINSON loves writing almost as much as he loves ranting about politics. Elite Daily lets him do both, and he couldn’t be happier now that he’s finally putting his years at SUNY New Paltz to good use. When he’s not writing, Sean enjoys nature excursions, playing the guitar and the Ultimate Fighting Championship. Look for him on “Real Time with Bill Maher,” where he regularly appears in his most precious fantasies.
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Photo: AP/AMC, Gene Page
They are farther ahead in their planning than you think!
http://www.cdc.gov/phpr/zombies_novella.htm