Almost inevitably, separation breeds ignorance in like measure.
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The moment remains seared in my mind. It was a television promo for a documentary some years back saying, in so many words, that we fear what we do not understand, and that what we fear, we seek to destroy.
Simple on the surface; but for me, a bolt out of the blue. Suddenly so much about humankind’s patterns of self-destruction became so clear. I’d long sensed that our human family’s sole root enemy was fear, and all else, its myriad expressions. But that one moment awakened my personal understanding of fear’s unconscious support system.
I see fear largely sustained by our learned, reinforced and convincing sense of separation—mere illusion, in many spiritual teachings. Almost inevitably, separation breeds ignorance in like measure. The door is opened wide to imagine anything but our common humanity, and we instinctively want that insecurity gone, its triggering sources reformed, further distanced, or slain outright. As separation’s destructive lengths birth ever more entrenched separation, a self-sustaining cycle churns, often read as survival’s price. But survival as… what, exactly? Our darkest selves? It would seem we’re still too unwilling to look that dysfunction squarely in the eye for any soul-deep reckoning. Turns out, tracing fear’s incarnations to their very womb may well be our deepest fear. The shadow we dare not unearth still drives unseen.
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An inconvenient, pesky intuition keeps whispering that with fear fully unmasked, acknowledged and disempowered, interpersonal dynamics gravitate naturally toward the creative, cooperative and constructive. I’m convinced that absent all fear, only love remains as our created and most natural selves, state and resource. A hard sell, perhaps. Fear, all but obsolete? Radical love, a new normal? What madness is this? But humor me. Consider these visualizations which can challenge and stretch familiar perceptions to offer a novel view from the other side of fear. They speak in turn to reimagined truth, ownership, and impetus.
What utmost vision of collective, radiant good could you, sweet parent, boldly hold and champion for this beloved, kindred whole?
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Imagine hypothetically that you are 100 percent as intimately connected to the personal experience of some not-understood or threatening “other” as you are to your own. We’re talking bravely and totally assuming their every awareness. Let all resistance be displaced by your desire and imperative to fully merge. What might you understand differently without the luxury of even a shred of insulating ignorance? What new guiding realization, be it subtle or stunning, might emerge? How would you be inclined to respond to or interact differently with this new “second self”?
Now, imagine yourself as a deeply caring parent of all humanity. Simply recognize in this relationship how every single earthly being is absolute family whose well-being and fulfillment you feel profoundly invested in; whose experience of good ignites your own gratitude and delight. Mindful of such powerful connection, what harm, suffering or injustice could your empathy not decry and urgently exhaust all human means to heal for any among your family? What utmost vision of collective, radiant good could you, sweet parent, boldly hold and champion for this beloved, kindred whole?
Lastly, imagine that your every possible human need is guaranteed to be met without question. The instant any need arises in you, it is answered perfectly. So utterly free of self-concern, how would you choose differently to be and to act in the world? Able to heed any call or honor any vision inspired beyond your already magically-supported self, what most natural expression radiates from that purest, freest center within? Can you sense and deeply know this as your truest, unconstrained self, beneath any and all possible fear? Dare you?
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So… Is there some secret to accessing our still-untapped loving potential that could miraculously shift and transform so much that appears intractable? My pesky intuition has had since my mid-teens to just drop the whole idea; let it go already. But no. Four decades later, that voice isn’t budging. It keeps saying, “You know. You know.” More than ever now, I simply see no future in thinking small about loving big. I’m done with calling ours a world not ready. We’ve got this. We’ve got this. Spoiler alert: It’s an inside job. Here it is, then, as I see it. Two things:
Understand the cumulative sorrow and severity of fear’s limitations, however cleverly disguised as some advantage.
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First, trust love. It’s ultimately all we are when lesser constructs are fully deconstructed. We’re not always clear or poised to claim its phenomenal power and new options for ourselves, but in every authentic way possible, cultivate the trust, beyond all challenging appearances. Fret not about two steps forward then one step back. Just keep exploring and embracing unconditional love’s viability wherever it flowers. Again and again and again. Without forcing, just allow; but above all, allow unceasingly. This way, when readiness and opportunity share the same courageous moment, more loving choices can advance our shared good, evidence love’s fuller potential, expose and dismiss more fearful alternatives for their stunting nature and harmful limits.
Finally, look for the fear. Especially the one saying, “Don’t look.” Many of fear’s hats read, “Empowerment.” “Peace of mind.” “Freedom.” Even “Love.” Understand the cumulative sorrow and severity of fear’s limitations, however cleverly disguised as some advantage. Look for fear in conditioned responses, entrenched traditions, committed institutions, compelling norms, everywhere it exists, no matter how hidden, denied or painful to confront. Lift those heavy stones of learned givens to see what lies beneath. If fear, see how that burden is inherited, not innately yours. Reimagine our natural human expressions unbiased by fear. Conspire to dismantle structures and stories which defend or widen human separation. Just chip away, one freeing honesty at a time. See ever more easily, “It’s the fear, dummy.” Don’t wait for the manufacturers of fear to issue a recall. This is your recall.
Arguably, the devil’s in the details. But never so insurmountably as when we let doubt eclipse trust—the trust in what love consciousness can collectively birth, unbound and fully expressed. Through triumph or setback, my intuitive compass points always to love, my only true north. Stumbling and rising again, as I steel myself to press on toward the humankind I would choose, asking only which direction is mine to move, that steadfast compass knows.
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My vision’s muse carries no empirical credentials. Because we so desperately need to imagine and create beyond the barriers of past forms, I sense intuition purposefully beckons from outside ‘seeing-is-believing’ boundaries. In fact, I’m confident that’s one exquisite way future wisdom will—and must—diverge. Believing becomes seeing. Perhaps the highest calling of existing in form is to also determinedly see beyond form, that we might beautifully shape it anew.
Wary reluctance wonders if consciously, courageously trusting the energy and potential of love over fear isn’t just naively drinking the Kool-Aid.
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We’re hurting, afraid, forgetting that fear’s obscuring shadow is our single bondage. Desperate, we look outside for answers beyond ourselves, doubting that anything within could possibly be enough. But outside, the same, familiar illusions only repeat. We can hardly bear not knowing decisively and powerfully what more or better to “do”. But our world must change from within—and can. One audacious vision of indestructible love at a time, joining, gathering, rising. Contagious, self-evident, unstoppable. The outer is choiceless but to mirror the inner.
Wary reluctance wonders if consciously, courageously trusting the energy and potential of love over fear isn’t just naively drinking the Kool-Aid. This I offer from my heart: Literally everything outside of the cup, please understand, all of it… is just Kool-Aid of another flavor—its label carefully, deceptively removed.
Ultimately, dear humans, we are simply choosing our flavors.
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Photo: Getty Images
Just wanted to say ‘Thank-you, Tim.’ for your vibrant & impassioned read. Philosophically, I don’t think the absence of all fear will *necessarily* leave only love; I don’t know if I think that all hates can reduced purely to a function, expression, mutation, or perversion of fear alone. Bet that as it may, on this particular element of causation though I would concede that I would be just as happy to be wrong, and -in the spirit of FDR- then ‘the only thing we have to conqueror is fear itself.’ Fear -like pain- though unsought & unwelcome, may also function rudimentarily to protect us… Read more »