Brandy and Leoance Williams share their resolutions, as a couple, for the new year. Maybe these will inspire you.
We have shared a lot of our lives this year. It is only fitting that we also share our Marriage Resolutions for 2014. This list is not meant to preach to anyone. Simply, this list constitutes our vows to each other. If the list helps you, feel free to use it. As always, please share your thoughts and comments with us.
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1. Date Night is a non-negotiable for at least one time each month.
Growth is essential for humanity. There is no person that should stay the same throughout all of their lives. The trouble is that some couples lose sight of each other because they do not take the time to date and keep passions alive. Just imagine, when people grow, they change. Those changes can pull a relationship apart. Date night can help. It doesn’t have to be extravagant; it just has to happen. We go to movies, or have movie night in. We also go to restaurants, bookstores and walks in downtown. The bottom line is that we make each other a priority, above everything else.
2. Speak positivity into existence, there is enough negativity in the world already. It has no place in your marriage.
We are not saying that individuals need to be unrealistically happy, 24 hours a day. Rather, when speaking with your mate, understand their needs, and support them with positivity. If your spouse is down, do not add to their discontent with more negative ideals and backlash. Instead, uplift them with positivity and hope. A strong partnership feeds off of each other. If the two of you are only feeding into and off of negative energy, there is nothing but negativity left for you.
3. Speak openly, with fluid conversations.
One message our readers have heard from us is that communication is essential in any relationship. We are resolving to communicate honestly and often. There is nothing that can hurt us more than keeping information from each other. It is wrong on so many levels to forget that honesty and openness are two foundations that cannot waiver in our relationship. Harboring negative feelings doesn’t uplift or forge our bond.
4. Give each other space. Your marriage won’t die from allowing your partner some alone time.
Being married doesn’t mean that two individuals lose themselves. The truth is quite the contrary. Being married is an addition to being oneself. We cannot lose personal identity in a marriage, because that can and will lead to resentment. Likewise, marriage shouldn’t suffocate or smother a partner. Think of it this way, how can you appreciate being together, without understanding how it feels to be apart.
5. Reflect often.
Spend time with your partner, understanding the world and how you operate within it. Reflection leads to growth. In a marriage, reflection also allows the couple to truly understand the dynamics of their relationship. However, reflection doesn’t have to happen together. Some reflection can happen individually, so that conversations can be fluid, open and honest.
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Brandy and Leoance Williams are the two sides of the From Two Sides series:
From Two Sides: Mismatched Sex Drives
From Two Sides: Gender Roles and Intimacy
From Two Sides: Confiding Your Secrets
—Photo Victor9501/Flickr
The little things like a simple meal without the kids can mean everything to a married couple. It’s scary how a marriage can take on water with just a modicum of neglect. Good tips all, here, and a great reminder that New Year’s resolutions don’t have to stop at weight loss and increasing your push-up count.
that’s actually important ….how much your spouse is precious to you. you need not to prove it to the world ..this is between you both. SO, it’s necessary to give time to each other.
Very nice confinement and explanation Brandy and Leoance….
This definitely works out