Signs You Do Not Trust Your Partner

Even if you are a beginner in the world of love and relationships, you would know that trust is fundamental. Just like a car cannot run without its four wheels, a relationship cannot succeed without trust. I will tell you the simplest hack to come across as cool: If you see a lack of trust in any relationship, predict that it will fail in the long term (100% success rate).

But before you jump to the conclusion that you do not trust your partner, here are some signs that will help guide your conclusion:

You second-guess them

Honestly, nothing hurts more than not being believed by your partner. Second-guessing your partner does not come as an obvious sign of distrust but it sure is a big one.

When you do not trust someone, you might also have a hard time believing in their competency. So, when they come to you all excited with an idea, plan, or like, you doubt their potential and are never sure if the results would turn out as anticipated.

If this is a common occurrence in your relationship, then there is distrust in it. I would suggest that you reach a conclusion based on just this one sign, make sure that there are some other signs too.

Something in your gut tells you that they cannot be trusted

The thing about the gut is that you feel an inkling about something without having a concrete fact or evidence on which to base your feelings.

In relationships, gut feelings work like this: whenever your partner tells you something, you do believe it in the first instance even if you have no reason to not believe them. You just feel that they might be lying.

In matters of trust, if you feel that whatever someone says is a lie, do not just always believe it. To begin with, acknowledge that if you are having such feelings, they indicate a lack of trust on your part but that does not necessarily mean that the other person cannot be trusted.

sit with yourself and try to pin down the exact reason why you feel so,
judge their actions and
I would suggest that you talk to them about it. Any healthy relationship is built on a foundation of being vulnerable and talking your worries and differences out.

Decide only after you have put yourself through this process.

You always want to be informed about their whereabouts

Does any of the following sound like you

you always want to know what your partner is up to,
you want to be constantly informed about their plans and where they are at,
when they come back, you try to squeeze in every little detail about their day,
you check their phone,
you keep a track of their social media like a detective.

If yes, then my dear, you do not trust your partner. Such a relationship cannot thrive in the long run because you will end up making the other person feel suffocated and unheard. Try to have honest communication with them, and if the distrust still persists, rethink the relationship.

You try to control them

If you try to control what your partner can do, who they can go out with, or any other aspect of their life, you probably do not trust the. Consider this test: You are scared to give them the freedom to make choices that either do not involve you or you disagree with. If such freedom makes you uncomfortable, then your relationship lacks trust.

Reality check? If this is true about you, then you will always have a hard time giving trust and this will be a roadblock to the success of your relationships. Consider seeing a professional unfold these thought patterns and learn new ones that will help you in developing a secure attachment style.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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