I sit on the sand with my 16 year old self
in Australia’s Gold Coast, where beaches flatline against the sky
and stretch towards infinity
at sixteen I sat on this sand with a boy
on my first trip overseas
not knowing any better
it was enough to sit in silence
for the joy of it
I flew home to New Zealand
and we sent 40 page letters
about nothing
for the joy of it
until it felt pointless
as if it slowed down my ambition
so I snapped to
and became an example
of what 16 should look like
later that year on a downhill slope
where my companions rode for fun
I panicked, braked too hard and fell off my bike, head over the handlebars
everyone knows you shouldn’t brake in gravel
you just ride through it
confidently
I shattered my front tooth
over years
it slowly turned grey
until I was afraid to smile
today I sit on the sands of the same beach before going to the dentist to fix it
today, after surgery
I’m going to smile
confidently
just because
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Robert Bye on Unsplash
