Slow Down and Listen

Asthe world has grown dependent upon instant information, rapid responses, and even quicker connections, the habit of slowing down with others and listening to them has become a lost art. The stress to keep up with the constant stream of information is overwhelming, and leaves us with less and less time to relate to, and listen to people. But what if the secret to a more fulfilling relationship and a deeper understanding of life lies in the simple act of slowing down and listening?

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A Lost Art

The Internet and social media have revolutionized the method we communicate with others. Tweets, instant messages, and TikTok videos prevail on our screens, forcing us to receive information in snippets. We’re used to scrolling through dozens of opinions without stopping to engage with them. The transactional nature of communication has grown, as if each conversation was just one more box on the to-do list.

We’re used to scrolling through dozens of opinions without stopping to engage with none of them

This does come at a cost. Works illustrate that people are lonelier than ever were in the past. For example, one 2018 research concluded that loneliness had become “epidemic” in the U.S., where almost half of Americans reported that most of the time felt alone.

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This is not a personal problem in and of itself; loneliness has real effect comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes on a schedule.

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The Science of Listening

More than the act of hearing, listening is an active skill. Scientists have learned that the act of listening affects different parts of the brain in a number of coordinated efforts. When we are listening, we’re not just taking in words; we are picking up on emotions, language, and the speaker’s intentions. Dr. Julian Treasure, a well-renowned expert in the field of sound and listening, has said, “we are losing our listening” in an age filled with constant noise and distraction.

When we are listening, we’re not just taking in words; we are picking up on emotions, language, and the speaker’s intentions

When we listen while being empathetic, when we show others that we see them, hear them, and appreciate their presence, this resonates with them in our attention. It is believed, that actual listening is so powerful that it can change the relationships and help the people overcome even their internal conflicts.

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The Therapeutic Part

Therapists are trained in the use of active listening as a healing tool. For a lot of people, this is the first place that are being heard. It has been recorded that feeling heard lowers a person’s stress and depression levels. In this environment, active listening allows the individual to explore and confront his emotions without being criticized. More often than not, this self-acceptance starts with being understood from another individual. A therapist’s deep listening thus creates an environment in which personal growth and change are promoted.

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The “Coffee with a Cop” Movement

Another great example of this kind of program is the “Coffee with a Cop” initiative that has taken place in various cities in the United States. In these events, local police officers are invited to meet over coffee with members of the area to comprehend and relate with one another. Being able to hear the fears and frustrations or concerns, police officers found a new perspective, and civilians learned about the challenges that officers had to face.

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In these open dialogues, it has been found that relationships would improve, tensions reduce, and in the end safer communities emerge.

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We Need This Now, More Than Ever

Ashumankind accelerates and gets advanced, the need for meaningful human contact is felt stronger. The backbone of human experience involves relationships, friends, colleagues, and even strangers if one can listen and without prejudice.

The backbone of human experience involves relationships, friends, colleagues, and even strangers if one can listen and without prejudice

So, when someone wants to share a tale, their anxieties, or even just a thought that happened to cross their mind, refrain from rushing through those moments. Take a deep breath, take the time, and listen. You could find that in doing so, we’re learning about our own selves. Be the silent presence that listens in a world of noise.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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