Ten Most Vital Emotional Needs in a Marriage

Marriage works well only when partners try to understand each other well. Emotional needs in marriages are the deepest desires of spouses. Therefore, satisfying your partner’s essential needs will benefit your significant relationship immensely.

It will fuel romantic love and reduce your chances of getting a divorce.

The greatest marriages are built on teamwork, a mutual respect, a healthy dose of admiration and a never-ending portion of love and grace.

Fawn Weaver

I adapted ideas in this post from “His needs, her needs” book by Willard F. Harley, Jr. (No affiliation, just respect for a great author). Of course, I’ve added on my own lived experience.

1. Intimate conversation

Intimate conversation is cardinal to a good marriage and is an intense desire of women. It is the art of talking about and listening to whatever the other person has to say.

Therefore, you should give each other undivided attention and avoid unnecessary interruptions. Also, avoid making selfish demands or angry outbursts during conversations.

A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seem too short.

Andre Maurois

…

2. Family commitment

Family commitment includes the willingness of spouses to have children together.

Couples should spend quality time focused on their children’s moral and educational development.

Activities include eating family meals together and engaging in family sporting activities.

Please learn how to agree with your partner about child training and disciplining. If you have children, be consistent in their discipline and discourage favouritism.

Also, know how to explain the rules to young children and bear gently their unending “why’s”.

…

Don’t like ads? Become a supporter and enjoy The Good Men Project ad free

3. Honesty and openness

Honesty and openness is the bedrock of many a successful marriage. You should feel free to truthfully share critical details of your past with the spouse without feeling judged or ridiculed.

…

4. Financial support

Whereas financial security is the dream of most adults, it is more important for married women.

…

5. Recreational companionship

Both partners should engage in joint activities that will afford opportunities for friendship.

Examples include sporting activities, recreations and hobbies. In addition, spouses who constantly engage in separate leisures may be sabotaging their marriage.

…

6. Affection

Affection is communicating care to your spouse in a non-intimate manner. Examples include sharing love notes, cards and flowers. You can also show appreciation by holding hands, cuddling, kissing and giving gifts.

It is ideal for couples to exchange gifts to celebrate their special anniversaries and birthdays.

Affection is the most profound need of women, but men also need affection to a lesser degree.

…

7. Sexual fulfilment

Sexual fulfilment is the most profound need of men. Due to higher testosterone, men have a higher sex drive than women. As a result, men become aware of sexual acts earlier.

Also, there are different motivations for sexual fulfilment in both sexes. For example, men take part in sex to please their cravings.

But, women’s reason is for intimacy and emotional bonding.

…

8. Admiration

Couples admire each other when they appreciate and respect their partner’s good qualities. Men crave admiration because it motivates and energizes them.

Behind every successful man should be an admiring wife. Go ahead to make a list of all the good qualities you admire in your spouse. Never flatter your partner with insincere statements.

Also, avoid criticizing your mate as it is disrespectful. Instead, raise complaints about genuine problems that deserve attention.

…

9. Physical attractiveness

Many men are concerned about the physical attractiveness of their spouses.

Hygiene and grooming is an important part of being continually attracted to your partner. Physical fitness and body weight may also be things partners want to work on together.

On average, women will invest more resources in cosmetics, makeup and hairstyling.

…

10. Domestic support

Domestic support is a vital emotional need of men. But, it is also becoming a concern of women as most of them are now engaged in full-term employment.

Domestic support comprises maintaining a home and caring for children and pets where available.

Examples of such activities include food preparation, dishwashing, laundry, vacuuming, and mowing the lawns.

In addition, couples should work together and seek paid help for some house chores they cannot do when they can afford them.

…

To Recap

Now, you have the ten most vital emotional needs in a marriage. Communicating these needs with your spouse and having them fulfilled will benefit your relationship exceedingly.

It will fuel your romantic love and lower the chances of divorce.