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My friend once asked me how I could put on a smile when I’m around someone I had a disagreement with. It’s simple… Just because we are not on good terms, it doesn’t mean I should be mean to you.
Are You Faking Being Nice?
Nope… at least, I don’t think I’m faking it. Even if you’ve wronged me, I’ll treat you with the same kindness as the next stranger.
Why?
Although I might not have forgotten the pain, I don’t live my life holding grudges. Life’s short and to waste it on hating someone? That’s sad.
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In 2018, I faced my first hater. The funny thing was she still seek my services after telling someone that my writing wasn’t up to standard. Guess what I did when I saw her alone in the corner at a social gathering? I invited her over to my table and introduced her to the group. We all had a good time despite our differences.
On a separate note, last month, my dad told me he was proud of me because I handled his difficult wife with the utmost respect and kindness.
Thank you for being kind to her
I didn’t register the effect it had until he told me that I helped him calm his nerves. Being that it was my dad’s birthday week when I met her, I’m just glad he was happy.
How To Be Kind To Someone Who Has Wronged You?
It won’t be easy to not be mean. Trust me, I know. When I heard about the bad comment about me, I wanted to tell everyone all the bad about the person. I stopped myself because I knew it wouldn’t do any good. Instead, I focused on myself and made it my mission to better myself every day.
Understand that their perspective is different than yours
Everyone has their own judgement on how things should be. Listen to their perspective. Really, really listen and understand. Perhaps, they just had a misunderstanding about you.
When they need help, help them
Put your feelings aside and help. Your hater might still not like you but others will see you’re not the monster he/she made you out to be.
Spread good words about them
One of my lecturers stopped a friend of mine from telling her about another student that she had to teach.
“I don’t want to have a pre-judgement of her before even getting to know her. It isn’t fair to her.”
It was something along that line. And it impacted the way I talked about others. Just because I had a bad experience working with a person, it doesn’t mean she won’t change. In fact, if you are constantly spouting bad remarks about others, it will backfire. People will fear to be friends with you because you might spread rumours about them to others.
If you have nothing good to say, don’t say anything.
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To be honest, being kind isn’t that hard.
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This post was previously published on [name of site] and is republished here with permission from the author.
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