Day 5
I wake up every morning confused and in complete denial of what’s happening.
It all sinks in a little deeper every night.
I am fucking humiliated. I’m thirty-seven, lying in my childhood bedroom, defeated, in a daze, and trying to figure out what the fuck happened.
What wrong turn did I take that brought me back to my parents’ house after a twenty-year relationship and two kids?
Speaking of my kids, I miss them so much.
I am beside myself (i.e., completely fucking numb) when I think of my babies in their beds tonight while I’m not there in the same house with them.
What are they thinking?
Are they okay?
Are they awake?
Do they need me to hug them?
Are they in their beds crying like me?
If you are in immediate danger, call 9-1-1. For anonymous, confidential help, please contact The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or 1-800-787-3234 (TTY)
You Are Loved. ❤
©2020 Divina Grey. All Rights Reserved.
Divina Grey is a ferocious woman and mother rebuilding her life one article at a time. She likes long walks on the beach, singing and playing her guitar, an electrifying workout, and a cup of coffee so decadent she can feel the frothiness in her bones. Over the last twenty-five years, Divina has stockpiled a collection of used journals in an elegant wooden chest and is oozing with gratitude for the chance to share her staggering long-time love of writing with the world.
—
Previously published on medium
***
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project and want a deeper connection with our community, please join us as a Premium Member today.
Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS. Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—
Photo credit: on istock