The Gen Z Stare: Silence or Defiance?

The Gen Z stare has officially gone viral. If you’ve been living under a rock, it’s this blank, deadpan look we give when something’s stupid, when we’re over it, or when we just don’t feel like responding.

People are freaking out about it in articles from The Washington Post, The New York Times, and Forbes — yep, it’s made it to the big leagues. Some say it’s a power move. Others say it’s rude. Some even say we’re “mentally ill” for doing it. But honestly, we’re just tired of the noise, and sometimes, silence really is louder than words.

The Power of Silence ( Why We’re Doing It)

Look, silence isn’t just a random thing we’re doing to be quirky.

It’s actually been studied like, scientifically — by people who knows the deal. Albert Mehrabian’s research shows that most of our communication is non-verbal. It’s not just what we say, it’s how we say it, the body language, the tone, and even when we don’t say anything at all. That’s where the stare comes in.

It’s not about being unfriendly — it’s about setting boundaries without needing to scream them out loud. It’s like Napoleon Hill said — mental control is power. We don’t need to engage in every conversation that comes our way. Sometimes, the stare says it all.

Albert Mehrabian — He’s known for his work on body language and non-verbal communication. While he didn’t directly focus on “ignoring” or the “stare,” his research showed how much of our communication is non-verbal. His 7–38–55 rule suggests that only 7% of communication is verbal, with 38% being tone of voice and 55% being body language. The power of silence fits into this because how we “say” things without speaking can have a huge impact.

Also, if you’ve heard of Thich Nhat Hanh, the Buddhist monk, you know he talks about how silence is a form of peace. But in today’s world? Silence isn’t just peace; it’s a weapon we use to protect ourselves from the constant noise and unnecessary drama. It’s the same thing Susan Cain talks about in her book Quiet — for introverts, silence is about reclaiming energy. And honestly, for us? It’s a form of defiance. It’s our way of saying, “Nope, I’m not engaging in your nonsense today.”

A Real-Life Example: The Gen Z Stare in Action

Here’s the thing: this stare isn’t just a fun little trend. It’s a boundary that sometimes really needs to be set.

I had a situation right after I gave birth where a doctor tried to suggest I take a sedative. I’m not gonna lie — after having a baby, the last thing I need is someone pushing sedatives on me. So, when I didn’t respond, he straight-up called me “manic with psychotic features.” I was like, excuse me?

Just because I didn’t engage in his nonsense? He even tried to make me stay an extra day and get psych evaluated. So what did I do? I gave him the stare. And you know what? That stare got him disciplined. Sometimes, silence is louder than saying something back.

No words, just a look. And that’s all I needed to take control of the situation.

Post-COVID: When Silence Became Our New Normal

Let’s talk about how we got here, though. Remember when COVID hit, and we all went remote? Social distancing became a must, and we spent a lot of time just managing our own space. Suddenly, we had control over our environment.

Then, the world flipped back to “normal,” and everyone was like, “Hey, it’s time to shake hands again!” Nah, fam 😭 You can’t just expect us to go back to that. After being isolated for so long, trying to figure out our own boundaries, the last thing we want is to go back to those old, forced interactions. The Gen Z stare is a form of resistance to that awkward transition back into a world where you have to smile and say “hello” even when you don’t mean it. For us, sometimes silence is the most authentic thing we can do.

So, here’s the deal. The Gen Z stare isn’t about being rude, it’s about not responding to things that don’t deserve your energy. We’re not ignoring people or being cold — we’re just being intentional about where we put our time and attention. The idea that it’s a trauma response?

Nope, it’s a self-preservation thing. It’s about being mindful of what we engage with and how we communicate. So, if you catch us giving you the stare, just know — it’s not personal. It’s just our way of keeping it real, setting boundaries, and navigating a world that’s still stuck in old-school communication norms.

The Gen Z stare might be misunderstood now, but in a few years? It could be the new standard. Who knows? It could be the future of how we communicate in the workplace.

Looking Ahead: The Future of the Gen Z Stare

As more of us step into leadership positions and shape the future of work, expect the Gen Z stare to be a tool for creating more space for genuine communication. We’re not trying to shut down conversation; we’re just reshaping how it happens. Maybe we’ll see workplaces where silence isn’t feared, but respected.

The stare is just the beginning soon enough, it could be the norm to leave room for more thoughtful, less transactional interactions. So, yeah, get used to it. The stare isn’t going anywhere.

Written By Semajā Holloman

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This post was previously published on medium.com.