The Harsh Truth About “Right Person, Wrong Time”

We often use the phrase, “right person, wrong time” to describe the one that got away.

They were perfect for us, or would have been perfect, had the timing only been better.

Sometimes this means that you met too young. Other times, it means you met at a time in your lives when one or both of you were unable to commit to each other.

Still, can someone truly be the right person for you if they aren’t able to pursue the relationship to its fullest?

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Timing is equally as important as the opportunity itself.

We often hear the phrase, “wrong place at the wrong time” when something goes awry. Notice that isn’t just the wrong place or just the wrong time. The two have to come together to create the perfect storm for something bad to happen.

The same can be said of relationships.

Good timing is just as important as a favorable opportunity. It is not enough to have a great opportunity during a time when you are unavailable — or lack thereof during the more convenient times.

The truth is — if they really wanted to, they would.

Part of finding the right relationship for you is finding the right time to be in a relationship.

If two people cannot agree on the timing, that alone is a sign that it isn’t meant to be.

Both people have to want something in order to make it work. Regardless of one’s reasoning, if a person means enough to them, they will move Heaven and Earth to be with that person. No obstacle is too great for two hearts that truly yearn to be together.

“Right person, wrong time” is just an indication that a person (or maybe both people) did not value the relationship enough to make the changes in their lives necessary to sustain it.

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Some of the best advice I’ve received in life is:

“Do what you think will make you the happiest when you look back.”

This sometimes means taking the risk, following your heart, and doing something entirely out of your comfort zone.

Other times, it means using your better judgment and acknowledging that as much as something might feel good at the moment, it won’t be the best option long term.

Regardless of the path you take, balancing your present wants with your future goals is important.

This is also true when it comes to the “right person, wrong time” philosophy.

It is often more prudent to consider your long-term goals when making immediate decisions. But when we don’t seize an opportunity, we are often left with the endless pondering of “what if?”

What if I had said yes?

What if I had stayed?

What if I had just been honest?

What if I had put myself out there?

What if I had done things differently?

Throughout life, we are inevitably going to have those “what if” moments. But for the best of us, they come and go, flowing in and out of our minds like water.

Being trapped in “what if” territory is never healthy — not for us and not for our partners.

The truth is, you can’t live your life in retrospect. This is why it’s so important to make decisions wisely with all the knowledge and context you have at the time you are presented with a choice.

If you consistently do this to the best of your ability, you are left with far fewer regrets in life.

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