
“Something amazing happens when we surrender and just love. We melt into another world, a realm of power already within us. The world changes when we change. the world softens when we soften. The world loves us when we choose to love the world.” — Marianne Williamson
Attraction is a very confusing concept. We are told to be ourselves, but then we are also told that we need to put our best foot forward and make a good impression.
However, when it comes to attracting the right love for you, the answer might lie in understanding your own personality type.
When I was really little, I was a perfect extrovert. I was outgoing, social, confident, and very easily excitable. I enjoyed the praises of the adults around me and thrived on all the attention lavishly poured on me.
As I got older and became the main victim of the school bully, my personality drastically changed to introvert. I became extremely shy and reticent. I would not speak unless spoken to, and I preferred to live in my head than in the world around me.
Now, I think I am an ambivert. An ambivert is person who has a balance of extrovert and introvert features in their personality. But for the most part, I always at at least 70–80% introvert.
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“Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.” — Bryant McGill
Introverts can be amazing partners, but they often have a hard time attracting the right love for them. Introverts often have a lot to give in a relationship, but they can struggle with opening up and being seen.
According to Wikipedia, it may be harder for introverts to find the right partner because they are not as outgoing as other people.
The introvert’s guide to attracting the right love for themAre you an introvert who wants to find lasting love? You may feel like it’s harder for you to find the right partner because you’re not as outgoing as some people. But don’t worry! There are plenty of things you can do to attract the right person for you. Here’s the introvert’s guide to finding love.
Are you an introvert that is tired of getting into mediocre relationships?
You are not alone.
Millions of people are introverts who find it difficult to attract the right love for them. But don’t worry, with this guide, you will learn some tactics that can help you identify your ideal partner and how to attract them into your life.
The good news is that there is someone out there who will perfectly complement your personality. It is possible to create a loving relationship that is based on mutual respect and understanding.
Here are 9 Easy Tips That Will Help You Attract The Right Partner For You, and Create a Loving Relationship That Lasts.
1. Understand yourself and what you need
“The most important conversations you’ll ever have are the ones you’ll have with yourself.” — David Goggins
When we are more self-aware we are better at understanding ourselves.
We are then able to identify changes we want to make and recognise our strengths so we can build on them. Self-awareness is often a first step to attracting the right partner for you.
When you take the time to understand yourself and who you are, your sense of individuality strengthens.
You become less easily influenced and pushed into a lifestyle that doesn’t represent who you are. It is important to periodically check in with yourself and know what your needs are.
The better you understand yourself, the easier it will be to attract the right partner for you, and to steer your life in the right direction.
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2. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want
“If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place.” — Nora Roberts
I grew up in a culture where asking directly for the things I want is considered rude. We are expected to wait until someone offers help, or else we suffer in silence or find a way to do things ourselves.
This trait then gets further amplified amongst introverts as we get older.
I have learned that ultimately, it is better to learn to ask for what we want. Especially in relationships. It helps create clear and honest communication channels with our partners.
As an introvert, you need to learn to ask for what you want.
There are times in your life where no one is going to approach you. No one is going to make sure that you’re okay. No one is going to see if you need anything. And those are the moments where the seeds of resentment can really be planted.
You are a person that has wants and needs in life too. Do not be afraid to ask for what you want in a relationship, whether you are at the talking stage, or dating, or married. Ask for what you want.
3. Let your true personality shine through.
“There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself.” — Anthony Rapp
It can be tough to attract the right person when you don’t feel like you can be your true self around them.
The old saying, “You’ve got to break a few eggs to make an omelet” is very fitting for us when dealing with letting our true selves out.
Understand that not everyone is going to like everything you say and or do at any given time. But hey, in order to be true to yourself and your tribe, you need to learn how to see others’ viewpoints as valid, especially your own.
By always presenting your genuine, vulnerable, authentic self, it does strengthen your acceptance of who you are.
The people who are meant to enhance your life and teach you lessons will come to you.
They will be drawn in by your weirdness, different opinions and unique styles of seeing and doing things.
Don’t be afraid of who you are; who and what is waiting for you will find their way to you, believe that.
Don’t be afraid to be yourself.
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4. Take time for yourself for self-care and self-love
“Self-love is not selfish; you cannot truly love another until you know how to love yourself.” — Unknown
I lived with my sister for a couple of years. She was a pure extrovert. She gets her energy from being around people and goes stir crazy when alone for too long. I’m the opposite. I’m an introvert who needs alone time regularly in order to feel grounded.
We found a way to make it work by each of us intentionally seeking out, and doing the activities that rejevenated us without judgement.
Owning our personalities and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.
According to Introvert Dear, to cultivate self-love as an introvert, you need to learn to recognize any negative voices in your head, know that you are worthy, and accept that people may never fully understand you and that is okay.
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5. Be patient — it will happen when the time is right.
“Trust the process. Your time is coming. Just do the work and the results will handle themselves.” Tony Gaskins
Everything comes to you at the right time, and it is important to understand that each and everything in life has got its own timing. You must be patient and understand that your time will come.
At times, we become sad if things do not turn up as we want them and exactly when we want them.
However, it is important to understand that life happens, and everything happens for a reason. In case things didn’t turn out to be in your favor, just remember that it happened only because that was probably not the right time for you.
Take things slow and don’t rush into anything. And be patient when in relationships. Your perfect partner exists.
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6. Know that you are worthy of love and respect.
“How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.” — Rupi Kaur
You deserve to be treated well by others. You deserve to be loved and respected. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to have your needs met.
You are worth investing time and energy into.
You are capable of great things. Your feelings are important. You have power and wisdom inside of you. What you want matters.
And all this is still true, even if you make mistakes. Even if you are not perfect. Even if you are quiet and introverted.
Remember that true love is out there, waiting just for you.
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7. Let your guard down
“Let your guard down and let people into your life even if it is only for a moment. Because when you let someone in, and it is the right person, it has the power to change you forever.” — Anonymous
Your romantic relationship is one of the most important ones in your life, so it is crucial that it feels good to you as an introvert.
Pay attention to the people who are drawn to you.
You may see someone you want to approach, but your overthinking talks you out of it. Or you may be an introvert with social anxiety, so you find that dating apps are an easier way to meet romantic prospects.
Once introverts have entered a relationship, however, they are usually in it for the long haul. So do not be afraid to let your guard down and let the right partner for you connect with who you really are.
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8. Find like-minded people
“Surround yourself with like-minded people. Success is a group activity.” — Angel Alzona
It takes thought and action to form a group of people in your life that you can rely on no matter what. You have to actively seek them out.
The key to attracting the right partner for you as an introvert is surrounding yourself with like-minded people and knowing what kind of people make you feel most secure, inspired, and confident.
Seek out activities and events that interest you. Connect with people who share your interests.
When you connect with someone, create a loving relationship that is based on mutual respect and understanding. You will find a partner who understands your needs and wants the same things out of life that you do.
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9. Let go of the need for perfectionism
“They say that nobody is perfect.” — Wilt Chamberlain
Nobody is perfect. The right partner for you is not perfect, and neither are you.
Generally speaking, it can be hard for introverts to find love compared to people with more outgoing personalities.
Introverts have a lot of great qualities, but they often don’t realize how wonderful they are and how much someone else could benefit from their love.
When an introvert lets go of how things are supposed to be as they see them in their mind, and allow themselves to tap into the outer world — it reduces their innate need for perfection.
As an introvert, this allows you to tap into your inner power and attract the right person for you.
Let go of the need for perfectionism.
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Final Thoughts
I hope you have found these tips for how an introvert can accept the right partner for themselves, useful.
I wish you loads of love and happiness and genuine expression in your relationships.
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And now your thoughts…
Comment “I am an introvert / extrovert / ambivert” in the comments section.
How has your experience attracting the right partner been for you?
Please let me know your thoughts in the comments section.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Shutterstock.com
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