The Most Misunderstood Saying in the Bible

As I walked down the hallway, head down, trying to avoid any kind of confrontation, I felt a shove from behind. My books scattered across the floor, and laughter erupted from the group of bullies who surrounded me.

This was a daily occurrence.

With shaking hands, I bent down to gather my books, and as I did, I counted to ten. This is what my Mom told me to do when I was angry.

And I was angry.

In fact, more than anything, at that moment, I wanted to stand up and punch the ring leader in the nose. What made those ten seconds all the more agonizing was the fact that I believed I could land a few blows if I really tried. I had rehearsed it in my mind many times.

I was not a small kid by any means. In fact, I hit puberty in the fifth grade and shot up like a basketball player… at least compared to the other kids. At one point, I was the tallest in my class, so I knew that, given the opportunity, I could make an impact.

But I never did take a swing.

In fact, I never really stood up for myself.

I copped the bullying all through my elementary school years for one simple reason: I was taught in Sunday School that I had to turn the other cheek. That’s what Jesus wanted me to do. No fighting back allowed!

As a kid, I really wanted to make Jesus happy, so I took these words literally and chose the path of passive acceptance. But, inside, I was torn. Why should I turn the other cheek? Why should I passively accept mistreatment and humiliation? Wasn’t I justified in defending myself against those who sought to belittle and demean me?

These were the questions that I would ask myself, in my own ten-year-old way, of course. It wasn’t until a long time later that I learned the real meaning of Jesus’s words.

On turning the other cheek

Matthew 5:39 records these words of Jesus Christ:

In the church that I grew up in, this verse was often interpreted in a way that emphasized meekness and passive acceptance. We were taught that turning the other cheek meant enduring mistreatment without protest, submitting ourselves to the will of others even in the face of injustice.

It was seen as a noble act of self-sacrifice, a demonstration of humility and forgiveness in the face of adversity. We were encouraged to emulate Jesus’ example of non-resistance, to absorb the blows of life without retaliating, trusting that God would ultimately vindicate us in the end.

But as I reflect on those teachings now, I realize that they only scratched the surface of Jesus’ message. They failed to capture the radical nature of his teachings and the profound implications of turning the other cheek in the context of his time.

Let me explain

A demand for dignity

First off, we need to examine the text closely. Matthew 5:39 is often misquoted as, “If someone slaps you on the cheek, turn the other cheek.” But that’s not accurate. Jesus specifies the right cheek. Why is it important that Jesus mentions which check it is?

In the cultural context of Jesus’s time, everyone was assumed to be right-handed. There was no alternative because the left hand was considered unclean (sorry to my left-handed friends, but that’s just how they viewed the world back them).

Picture this scenario: You’re facing a right-handed person, and they slap you on your right cheek.

How can they physically do that?

They must backhand you.

(Try it with a friend if you like!)

A normal slap was indeed insulting, but a backhanded slap was even more degrading. According to the Bava Kamma Mishnah, the traditional Jewish interpretation of the law, a slap incurred a fine of 200 silver coins — but a backhanded slap required a payment of 400, the same amount as for spitting on someone. It wasn’t just about physical violence. It was about humiliation.

A backhanded slap was what you’d give to an inferior or a slave.

Now, imagine you’re a low-class slave in the ancient Roman world. You’re powerless and marginalized, and your life is not your own. To resist would mean certain punishment or even death.

Then, one day, your master backhands you. They expect you to cower and whimper, to accept your inferior status without question. But instead, you look them in the eyes and turn your head to put your left cheek forward. By doing so, you’ve actually challenged their authority.

Here’s where it gets interesting. They can’t slap you with their left hand because it’s considered unclean for both of you. And they can’t backhand you again because your right cheek is now turned away from them. To strike again, their only option is to slap you with the palm of their hand — and that is a gesture reserved for equals.

In essence, by turning the other cheek, you’ve disrupted the power dynamic. You’ve refused to be dehumanized or controlled. You’ve asserted your humanity and challenged the oppressive system that seeks to marginalize and subjugate you.

This seemingly small act of defiance carries profound significance. It’s not about cowardice. It’s about courage. It’s about using non-violent resistance to expose the absurdity of the power play and reclaim agency in the face of oppression. By turning the other cheek, the oppressed bring discomfort and shame upon the oppressor. The oppressive system is exposed — its authority is undermined by a simple yet powerful act of resistance.

Now, that puts a different spin on things, doesn’t it?

While Jesus certainly wasn’t advocating for a violent response, he was definitely inviting us to non-violent resistance against powers and people that demean and oppress.

The ones who did it best

When one thinks of great figures throughout history who exemplified the real essence of the principle of turning the other cheek, it’s hard to go past Martin Luther King Jr.

Faced with systemic racism, violence, and oppression, King advocated for nonviolent resistance as a means of challenging injustice. He encouraged his followers to turn the other cheek, not in passive submission, but as a powerful form of protest against discrimination and inequality.

In the face of brutality and hatred, King and his fellow activists remained steadfast in their commitment to nonviolence, refusing to retaliate with violence of their own. Through peaceful protests, boycotts, marches, and civil disobedience, they exposed the moral bankruptcy of segregation and racial discrimination, ultimately leading to significant advances in civil rights legislation.

Martin Luther King Jr. turned the other cheek and, in so doing, was saying to the white man, “Slap me if you must, but if you do, you will slap me as an equal.”

And we cannot overlook the example set by Jesus Christ himself. Jesus consistently challenged the oppressive systems of his time with radical acts of love and compassion. In the face of hostility and persecution, Jesus preached a message of forgiveness and reconciliation, urging his followers to love their enemies and pray for those who persecuted them. His ultimate act of turning the other cheek came in the form of his crucifixion, where he willingly endured suffering and death for the sake of humanity, all the while praying, “Father, forgive them! For they know not what they do!”

Both Martin Luther King Jr. and Jesus Christ faced death as a consequence of their courageous acts of non-violent resistance. However, paradoxically, in their sacrifice, they took back all the power from their oppressors.

The ultimate power move

American author Morgan Richard Olivier says this:

And she is right.

When we choose to respond with grace and dignity in the face of adversity, we reclaim agency over our own narrative. By turning the other cheek and refusing to be provoked or drawn into conflict, we demonstrate a strength that transcends physical power. Instead of allowing others to define us or our circumstances, we assert our autonomy and resilience. In essence, we shift the balance of power in our favor. Yes, turning the other cheek actually upsets the power dynamic.

Jesus knew this. MLK knew it, too.

Turning the other cheek strikes a harder blow than any physical retaliation ever could, for it challenges the very foundations of oppression and injustice.

The last word

I often wonder how I might have responded differently as a ten-year-old if I knew what I know now about “turning the other cheek.” Could I have upset the power dynamic there?

What if I had been brave enough to stand up, lift my head, push my shoulder back, and meet their gaze, offering my other cheek in a silent challenge? Would it have changed their behavior?

I do not know.

But I do know this: At the very least, it would have given me back my dignity, agency, and the ability to do something. I did not need to be a punching bag for Jesus or anyone else.

Nor do you.

To any of you who were raised in religious communities where “Turn the other cheek” was used to try to make you into a nice, compliant, timid person, I’m sorry.

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This post was previously published on Backyard Church.

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