The Number One Difference Between a Boy and a Man

When we humans used to live in tribal societies, we subjected boys to challenging rituals when they reached a certain age, and would call them “men” once they passed the trials.

In modern society, such rituals where we clearly determine that a boy has become a man no longer exist.

However, we’ve all felt the difference, right?

Even if a “man” is in his 30’s, 40’s, or even older, he can still come off as just a boy or a “manchild.”

And some young men barely in their 20’s can come off as mature men.

What differentiates a boy from a man in modern society?

Is it just legal adult age? That can’t be it.

Does a boy “become a man” after having sex for the first time, or when he shows physical evidence of puberty like the tropes we say about girls “becoming women” in such cases? Nah, there are certainly plenty of immature boys who aren’t virgins.

From what I’ve seen in both myself and other men…

A boy becomes a man when he becomes accustomed to being responsible for others.

I’ve seen that shift from boyhood to manhood happen to fathers who find themselves needing to be good role models.

I’ve seen it in leaders who begin to prioritize serving others not for egotistical reasons, but from believing in the ideals and causes of their communities.

A real man serves a higher purpose than himself through leadership in some form or another.

None of that “sigma male” lone wolf crap.

It’s a kind of maturity that involves finding himself interconnected with others around him.

This type of service-minded leadership directly helps you become grounded in your masculinity.

This obviously also helps you become more attractive to women, far more than any “f*ckboy” could be.

So, embrace your masculine calling by finding a way to help others through some sort of leadership.

Your life will feel a lot more fulfilling that way.

If this is a topic that interests you, learn more about the relationship between leadership and masculinity in my book, Never Lonely: The Uncensored Guide on How to Attract and Be Loved by Women.

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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.

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