Ihave a close friend April, a licensed therapist at Love University in Vermont, and we talk about the one truth clients forget to remember to live better, happier, more meaningful lives.
April and I talk and question truth often.
What is this truth, where do we find it, or how does it find us? Why do some people live in truth and others don’t?
Does the truth begin to happen when we strip away the layers of lies we’ve taught ourselves? Or does the truth apply to those living in integrity with who they truly are?
And lastly, are you part of the 95% of people who think they’re self-aware, but only 10–15% that truly is?*
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
April, the queen of better questions, always asks, “What makes you feel most alive?”
And this is a fun place to start towards truth.
So your turn, what makes you feel most alive?
Let that question sit in your soul like a hot bowl of grandma’s best chicken noodle soup.
Breathe in and wonder about the meaningful things in your life. Maybe shut your eyes for a moment and listen.
- What did you hear?
- What did you feel?
- What did you see?
- What do you want more of?
How many moments do we get each day to enjoy, celebrate, share, ponder, wonder, watch, or let go of?
This is my truth — trying to +1 this moment into the next moment and +1 the next moment into the moment after that. I do this over and try to be aware of this over and over until my life is a compounding cascade of moments.
This also means:
Can I leave my phone off?
Can I turn off my computer?
Can I meditate and breathe in life as it happens?
Can I check in with my body, nature, and the world around me?
Can I smile?
Can I look my partner in the eyes?
Can I slow down?
Would you be happier if you connected to your moments more?
Can you feel nourished by the food you chew? Start thriving with the relationships you cultivate. Begin laughing at the warts life gives us. Live curiously in the authentic life you want. Find your flow in the hobbies, arts, and work you enjoy.
All of this is happening right now, not in the future or past.
Photo by Jesse Bowser on Unsplash
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“As soon as you honor the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve, and life begins to flow with joy and ease. When you act out the present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care, and love — even the most simple action.” — Eckhart Tolle
Honor.
I love that word.
How do you honor your moments?
How do you live your truth and stop holding yourself back?
If you are alive and still reading these words (which, by golly, I hope you are — otherwise, I’m calling the ghoul police), you can begin to honor this moment. And the next. And the one after that.
Let’s honor as many moments as we can!
Or am I missing something?
The truth is, the universe isn’t stopping you from tapping into or honoring its infinite moment.
Today I tried to honor my truth by:
- Watching my nostalgic and anxious feelings go by as I packed my life into boxes to move from my home in Michigan to North Carolina.
- Laughing at my girlfriend as she put on her old swimming goggles and rubber condom swim hat as she danced like a robot.
- Petting our adopted cat Earl Gray, that now has three winter chins.
- Finding my flow while writing these words.
- Watching my 17-year-old Jack Russell dog moan like a billy goat for more wet dog food.
- Making horrific (but meaningful) music on my keyboard or computer.
- Being with my mom and step-dad Terry on Christmas Eve, people whom I love deeper than an Enron drilling sea station.
- Cackling about the U-Haul reservation putting me on hold again.
Your truth lives inside you, just as my truth lives inside me.
Let’s honor these moments, however big or small, anxious or liberating, frustrating or gloriously ridiculous.
Photo by Benjamin Davies on Unsplash
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Maybe you don’t believe in your ability to find or live your truth.
Then this is the work that must be done: you must awaken your self-awareness about what truth you wish to live.
Do you want to live angry? Bitter? Do you want to react to everything around you? Or do you want to live in peace? In joy? In laughter? In health?
To find your truth, it might be time to reflect on what things, beliefs, people, and ideas hold you back.
This process isn’t an overnight self-awareness pill, but it can be.
You can strip away the dirt, the grime, and years of conditioning by just being here, present with the life happening right before you.
Whether it’s meditation or therapy, or walking in nature, or letting go of trauma, or climbing Everest, or loving a new human, or adopting an animal, or making a human, or being a better parent, or writing a symphony, or figuring out nuclear fission, or publishing a book, you are responsible.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR LIVING IN:
- Compassion.
- Kindness.
- Presence.
- Finding beauty.
- Letting go.
- Growth.
- Forgiveness.
- Apologizing.
- Recognizing irrefutable humor in almost every damn thing there is.
The truth is, in the end, only you can live your truth. Maybe others can help you discover it, but only you can live it. And maybe that means we’re self-centered narcissists.
But doesn’t self-awareness teach us how to speak to that internal bully that wants control and pushes us out of grace, compassion, and joy?
However good or bad your life feels, honor this moment and the next, be grateful, and cackle back at whatever the next moment brings.
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Forbes: % of People Living in Self-Awareness
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
 White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism |
 Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box |
 The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer |
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Photo credit: Jae Park on Unsplash
