In my new book ‘Offline Dating’, there’s a chapter focused on how to attract your ‘crush’.
But I’ll quickly summarize it in this post.
The truth is: grown men shouldn’t have a ‘crush’.
If you liked her long enough to define her as a ‘crush’, that means you should have already asked her out.
There’s no benefit in waiting for the perfect moment to ask someone out in modern dating.
The perfect moment is: as soon as you see her!
If she’s hot enough, she won’t be single for long. You need to shoot your shot before the next wave of Tinder and Instagram DMs flood into her phone.
But that’s not the only reason.
Your lack of hesitation in making something happen with this woman is impressive.
It shows assertiveness, bravery and confidence. It shows you believe in yourself. It shows you believe that she’d have a good time with you.
That’s assuming you’re asking her in person, of course.
My College Crush
The last time I had a crush was in college.
This slim little brunette made my heart thump out of my chest whenever I spotted her in the cafeteria.
She was always surrounded by the other hotties who studied hair and make-up, which made her even more intimidating. The cheerleader effect!
That sounds cute, but it was actually quite unpleasant.
I decided that I had to ask her out ASAP, if only so I could stop feeling like this!
I’d rather know one way or the other. Will she blow me or blow me out?! Either option would beat this constant anxiety of wondering when is the best moment to talk to her.
Plus, I’d probably look cooler talking to her than staring at her over my shoulder all the time.
I realized this as an awkward 17-year-old virgin. Now you realize it too.
Making My Move
Fortune favors the brave.
I’d promised myself I’d talk to this woman even if her whole entourage was there.
Yet, by sheer luck, this woman was sitting on her own in the cafeteria the next time I saw her.
So, before talking myself out of it, I went over and told her I’d seen her around and wanted to say hi. She was friendly and we made smalltalk about the college and our courses.
Eventually, I asked if she wanted to go to the cinema with me. (I know, I know, it’s the worst date idea ever, but we were teenagers).
She said she’d love to, but she had a boyfriend.
I tried to soften the blow by inviting her to come and play pool the next time she was in the cafeteria. She said she would.
And that was that.
Rejection.
But it wasn’t the humiliating experience that most teenage boys expect.
Word actually got around college that I asked this chick out.
But it didn’t make me a laughing stock.
A couple of guys told me “Fair play, she’s so hot isn’t she.” There was respect in their eyes. I’d done what they were probably too scared to do.
What’s more, my anxiety around the hair and make-up girls had completely vanished. I’d say hi to my former crush whenever I saw her in the cafeteria and she introduced me to some of her friends.
And I ended up making out with a couple of these friends at a college party later that year.
Would that have happened if I’d sat staring at them all semester?
Probably not.
It Gets Easier The More You Practice
From that moment on, I pledged to always ask women out quickly. Before they had time to become my ‘crush’ and intimidate the heck out of me.
I’ve got better at doing this with experience. Now, I barely get nervous talking to women at all.
There are more advantages to quickly making a move on your crush which are outlined in ‘Offline Dating’.
The book also offers tried-and-tested steps to seducing women in any offline scenario. Busy streets, parks, cafes, beaches, school, work, gyms and more.
If you want proven strategies to become a smooth casanova in any real-world situation, you should probably click here to buy it.
In the meantime, your homework for this week is to ask your crush on a date.
That way, she won’t be your crush anymore. She’ll either be that stupid woman who rejected you or that hot chick you’re dating.
It’s better to know either way!
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My new book ‘Offline Dating’ is available in e-book and paperback format. To learn more, click here or watch the video below.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Joshua Rawson-Harris on Unsplash
