In the city of Jordan, Maryland, located on the Eastern Shore of Maryland, if you call an African American the “N-word” and you are not African American, you can be punched out.
Yes! It is the law in the city.
The law has never been tested, but it is on the books. Many are waiting for a chance to strike a blow for anti-racism.
For the record, the city of Jordan only has 143 residents. Most of the residents are African American, but Americans of all ethnic and racial backgrounds come to the tiny town for business reasons and to pass through.
The city’s caretakers passed the law because a UPS driver called an older African American woman, Estelle Washington, “the n-word.” It seems Mrs. Washington, 98 years young, had too many questions for the driver, and he told her, “come on n —, I got deliveries to make.” It wasn’t long before the whole town heard about the verbal abuse.
When Mrs. Washington’s son, Rollo Washington, was told of the incident and how it upset his mother, he vowed to find the driver and “knock his ass out.” That’s when the law was passed.
“There is no way we, good people of Jordan, Maryland, will tolerate anyone insulting and upsetting one of the founders of the city,” the city’s mayor, Thomas Garvey, said. “We will act to let outsiders and visitors know we are a free city of African Americans who own our city collectively and love one another and all human beings of goodwill.”
The ordinance, as passed by the city and according to Garvey, is patterned after the well-known “Stand Your Ground Laws” all across the country.
Those laws usually are worded as follows:
The Jordan, Maryland law known as “The Anti-Racist-Hate Ordinance of Jordan, Maryland” reads as follows:
The law is very specific. It shifts the thought process onto the person who is being verbally or physically attacked with racist hate and allows them to act.
“This ordinance means Black people do not have to retreat or take verbal abuse from people who have no sense of human decency,” Garvey added. “You get disrespected; you can address it right away. This will tell others to watch it.”
The ACLU has stated they believe the law violates free speech. “This law,” the ACLU said in a released statement, “quells free speech. It might cause violence where other avenues of dispute resolution can be used.”
But Rollo Washington disagrees.
“You see, hate speech is free speech, but this law says there are consequences for being a bigot openly and directly. African Americans will no longer turn the other cheek in Jordan. We will turn someone else’s cheek black and blue, ya dig.”
The state of Maryland, for the record, states it does not believe in the law but does not know if it can legally repeal it.
“Each incident under this law is a separate incident. We will review the incidents and see if they violate other laws.”
Mayor Garvey when asked about the state’s position made it plain: “No comment.”
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Disclaimer: All characters and events in this article, even those based on real people and events, are entirely fictional. It is written to poke fun at the subjects mentioned. It is satire. It is also what is known as Speculative Writing and a chronicle. The writing is to make a point about life in America for Black America.
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This post was previously published on Bumpyjonas – he/him.
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