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“All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts” ~~ Bill Shakespeare
It seems simple enough to say that the world is a stage and we all step into one of three roles, victim, villain or victor/hero. Sometimes we trade one role for another based upon circumstances that we think control us.
I love simplicity. Breaking down the complexities of life into bite sizes helps me manage them and make it easier to teach others how to cope with this weird thing we call Life. I learned years ago that the brick wall that we all seem to face in front of us was merely a stack of individual bricks that can be dissembled one at a time and we could move on into our next adventure. However, it seemed that some folks, some damn fine folks, seemed to be stuck in their challenges calling them problems and disasters. They were victims and the more help and advice I shared the tighter they clutched to their problems. As I let go and left them to their issues, they called me back. “Help me, save me!” they chanted. They were self-inflicting trauma into their lives because getting saved by a “hero” meant by their perception, that they were loved and cared for. A person intent on drowning will disregard the dozen floatation devices bobbing all around him. People change when they have good reason to change and not until. There has to be something better and more attractive to them to cause them to break away from being a victim. I used to be a victim for too many years than I care to remember. No one would believe it today because I switched to becoming a victor in life and hero to thousands of disadvantaged kids in the Peruvian Andes with my project Changes for New Hope (www.changesfornewhope.com)
I thought being a victor/hero was the bee’s knees (or The Bomb if you’re too young to relate to bee’s knees) Being a victor and hero had its own set of obstacles. To be a hero you have to do valiant battle with the nemesis of the victim, the villain. Your brain has something set up in it called the Reticular Activated System R.A.S. for short. It will see whatever you are looking for, even subconsciously. Buy a new red Toyota Camry and suddenly every car on the road is a red Toyota Camry. The victor/hero, to justify their own existence, sees villains lurking around any corner and vanquishing them means total annihilation of them without compromise, without mercy, total scorched earth, take no prisoners. They leap into the fray of any debate or contention. In short, they can be a prize horse’s ass in fairly short order. Heroes tend to watch Game of Thrones and take notes. The notion that it is what it is and life needs to be a journey of flowing occurrences because most issues take care of themselves, becomes lost on them. Change is inevitable and victims clutching to their issues long after the solutions flash into their path will drown before they grab onto one. Realizing that I can not be expected to set myself on fire in order to keep others warm took years to realize. I was ready to make the leap from victim to victor but that didn’t mean everyone else would. A very hard reality. My shiny suit of armor became a Jim sized anchor.
Life is a stage and we are all mere players. We become empowered when we realize that we can choose which role we play because it is our stage. We are also the director, sound and lighting crew, music conductor and curtain-raiser. Our lives are a creation of our choosing and even though we can not see what is around the corner coming at us, we can prepare our responses, our attitude and our level of involvement in whatever happens to be in store in Act III. People attract the rage and consequences of communities and possibly whole nations if they have a media presence that large, so the villain role precedes becoming a self-inflicted victim. Victims who are sick and tired of being sick and tired can step into a victor role over their obstacles because there are so many resources available to them with the click of a few keystrokes on YouTube. Victors need to remember that not everyone in trouble wants to be saved. Not every villain can be vanquished and self-care is not being selfish.
What role are you playing today on your own stage of life? Where do you want to be by Act III and how will you get there? Remember my friends, it is all up to you. I hope this helps you get a little closer to becoming the person that you have always wanted to be.
Live large, live deliberately.
~~ Jim Killon
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