Why I’m done calling love a mistake.
Was it worth it to be happy for a little bit, even though it ended up sad?
I’ve been stuck on that question longer than I want to admit.
Because part of me keeps wondering if it would’ve been better if the whole thing never happened. If it would’ve been easier to just… skip it. Avoid it. Keep my life clean and unbruised and predictable.
I used to think happiness had to justify itself.
Like if something ended badly, then it must’ve been a mistake.
Like love only mattered if it stayed.
Like if it didn’t last, it didn’t count.
But that feels way too neat for how life actually works.
Because I was happy.
Not in a movie way. Not all the time. But enough.
Enough to laugh without thinking.
Enough to feel seen for a moment.
Enough to wake up some days and think, wow… something good is actually happening.
And I don’t think those moments just disappear because they were followed by loss.
Sadness doesn’t cancel out joy.
I think it proves it existed.
It’s the receipt.
If you didn’t get something real, you wouldn’t be carrying anything now.
And maybe the real tragedy wouldn’t have been how it ended.
Maybe the real tragedy would’ve been never feeling anything at all just to avoid the ending.
Never opening up.
Never risking it.
Never letting something touch you deeply enough to leave a mark.
Yeah, it hurt.
And yeah, sometimes it still does, in quiet, unexpected ways.
In songs. In places. In random moments that sneak up on you.
But if I’m honest…
If you gave me the choice between never loving and loving even briefly, I think I’d still choose the ache.
Because being happy for a little while meant I was alive.
It meant I showed up.
It meant I didn’t hide.
And to me, that’s worth it.
Some things aren’t meant to last forever.
Some things are just meant to change you.
And maybe that’s enough.
See you tomorrow.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Võ Mạnh Đức On Unsplash
