A common question or concern in many communities full of men who feel inadequate in some way, such as the /r/short subreddit on reddit.com, is how to deal with “not being the ideal preference,” and the fact that you will “never be anyone’s first choice.”
Other short guys: How do you deal with not being the ideal preference?
I’m 5’5 and I know that there are some girls out there that don’t care, but those are very few; most girls would rather a taller guy. I just don’t know how to get over that, no matter what, I will never fit this ideal. I know that I can’t change my height but I just can’t stop fixating on it. I feel like I will never be anyone’s first choice…I don’t wanna feel like this anymore. I thought I got over it but I haven’t. I spent the last two nights crying about this. — A 19-year old reddit user
I’m the same height as this kid,
but the difference between me and him is that I was fortunate enough to discover “pickup artist” material online when I was still in high school, allowing me to attract many women throughout my life (despite all the toxicity and misogyny I had to wade through to get to a healthy point).
It’s much harder to find and access good content about attracting women these days, unfortunately for this young man (hopefully my book can make at least a little bit of a difference for lonely guys like him). It’s like male loneliness became an even more taboo topic ever since #MeToo, with many websites and advertisers outright rejecting any and all content related to the men’s dating niche, no matter how it’s presented. But I digress.
No one is perfect.
First of all, everyone has flaws. There isn’t a single person in the world you could call “perfect.” Perfection doesn’t exist outside of our imaginations.
To whomever is reading this: we are all in the same boat. You might think you’re too short to be anyone’s ideal type. I guarantee you that the next person thinks also thinks they have some sort of flaw that makes them not ideal for the majority of whichever gender they’re attracted to.
Preferences matter less than you think.
As I mentioned in my previous article about being tall vs. being muscular, there is a huge difference between preferences and dealbreakers. And, even though virtually all straight women prefer tall men over short men, the vast majority of attractive women do not consider shortness a dealbreaker. If you’re a short man, you can still be good enough and still be attractive to many, many women throughout your life.
The best anyone can do is to try and be “good enough.”
And the good news is that being good enough is good enough. You could even be a woman’s first choice if you’re good enough, even if you don’t check every box on their list of preferences. How?
Make her feel things. Flirt with her. Excite her. Connect with her. Turn her on. Make her feel safe. Arouse her imagination. Make her feel protected. Build anticipation. You can do all of this through learnable skills that have absolutely nothing to do with your height or how you look.
For women, feelings are far more powerful than appearance.
You will quickly learn that women care a hell of a lot more about how you make them feel compared to how you look.
And if you learn how to make them feel wonderful, they will love you for it, no matter what you look like.
Not sure where to start learning how to do all that? The first step I recommend would be to read my book, Never Lonely: The Uncensored Guide on How to Attract and Be Loved by Women.
Then just follow the steps until you find your home in the arms of the woman (or women) you love.
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Never Lonely: The Uncensored Guide on How to Attract and Be Loved by Women
Amazon.com: Never Lonely: The Uncensored Guide on How to Attract and Be Loved by Women eBook : Chief, Michael: Kindle…
neverlonelybook.com
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
What Does Being in Love and Loving Someone Really Mean? | My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me | The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex | The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence |
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Photo credit: Brett Jordan on Unsplash