Narcissistic triangulation is a technique that narcissists use to maintain control over their victims. It involves bringing in a third person to create a triangle of competition, jealousy, and envy.
This can be very damaging to relationships, and it is important to understand what it is so that you can protect yourself from it. In this blog post, I will discuss narcissistic triangulation in detail and provide some tips for dealing with it.
1. What is Narcissistic triangulation?
Narcissistic triangulation is a manipulation tactic often used by narcissists to create feelings of insecurity in their partners. The purpose of this is to keep them feeling off-balance and dependent on the narcissist for validation and attention.
It works by deliberately creating a triangle between the narcissist, their partner, and another person. This can be done through flirting, having an emotional affair, or even going so far as to have a physical affair.
2. Effects of Narcissistic triangulation on relationships
The effects of narcissistic triangulation on relationships can be devastating. It can sow seeds of doubt and insecurity, leading to constant fights and eventually leading to the breakdown of the relationship.
This behavior can have devastating effects on the victim, who may feel left out, unworthy, and paranoid. The constant stress of being caught in the middle of the narcissist’s games can also lead to anxiety and depression.
In addition, narcissistic triangulation can damage the victim’s other relationships, as they may start to distrust their friends and family.
Signs of Narcissistic Triangulation
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If you are in a relationship with someone who you think may be using narcissistic triangulation, there are some signs to look out for. Some of the most common signs include:
- Feeling constantly jealous or suspicious of your partner
- Feeling like you are always competing for your partner’s attention
- Feeling like you can never quite please your partner
- Receiving mixed messages from your partner
- Having the feeling that you are always being watched or monitored
- You are always being compared with others.
If you are experiencing any of these signs, it is important to trust your gut and to seek professional help in order to address the issue. Narcissistic triangulation can be very damaging to relationships, so it is important to deal with it as soon as possible.
Phrases use narcissists during triangulation
Some of the most common phrases used by narcissists during triangulation include:
- “You’re just too jealous/sensitive”
- “I can’t help it if other people find me attractive”
- “You’re just being paranoid/overly jealous”
- “You’re trying to control me”
- “I’m not doing anything wrong, why are you getting so upset?”
Examples of Narcissistic Triangulation
Example1
Nina is in a relationship with Mark. She has always been insecure about her attractiveness, and she constantly worries that Mark is not attracted to her. She often gets jealous when she sees him talking to other women. One day, she sees Mark flirting with another woman and she becomes enraged.
She accuses him of having an affair and starts yelling at him. Mark tries to explain that he was just joking around with the woman, but Nina doesn’t believe him. This argument leads to the breakdown of their relationship.
Example 2
Haley is in a relationship with Alex. She has always been suspicious of Alex, and she has a feeling that he is cheating on her. One day, she sees Alex flirting with another woman and she becomes convinced that he is having an affair.
She starts spying on him and following him around, trying to catch him in the act. Eventually, this behavior leads to a huge fight between them and the breakup of their relationship.
Tips for Dealing With Narcissistic Triangulation
If you are in a relationship with someone who you think may be using narcissistic triangulation, there are some things you can do in order to protect yourself. Some tips for dealing with this toxic behavior include:
- Set boundaries with your partner and stick to them. Make it clear what you will and will not tolerate in your relationship.
- Communicate openly and honestly with your partner. Be assertive in expressing your needs and wants.
- Keep your own independent friends and activities. Make sure you have a support system outside of your relationship.
- Seek professional help. If you are struggling to deal with the issue on your own, seek out a therapist or counselor who can help you address the problem.
Narcissistic triangulation with new supply
When a narcissist senses that their current supply is about to leave them, they will often find a new source of supply to keep them hooked. This can often result in a period of triangulation, where the narcissist will compete for the new supply’s attention and try to isolate them from their old support system.
This can be very damaging to relationships, so it is important to be aware of the signs and protect yourself if you are in a relationship with a narcissist.
How to react to narcissist triangulation?
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This is when the narcissist pits two people against each other in order to maintain their own power and control. For example, the narcissist might tell one person that the other person is badmouthing them.
This can create a lot of tension and conflict between the two people, and it can also make the narcissist feel more powerful.
If you find yourself in a situation where you are being triangulated by a narcissist, it is important to stay calm and collected. Don’t fall into the trap of arguing with the other person or trying to prove yourself to the narcissist.
Instead, focus on maintaining your own peace of mind and boundaries. Remember, narcissist is ultimately responsible for their own actions, and you don’t have to let them control you.
Last words
Narcissistic triangulation can be a very damaging and destructive behavior, both for the people involved in the triangle and for the relationship as a whole. If you find yourself in a situation where you are being triangulated by a narcissist, it is important to stay calm and collected.
Don’t fall into the trap of arguing with the other person or trying to prove yourself to the narcissist. Instead, focus on maintaining your own peace of mind and boundaries.
Remember, narcissist is ultimately responsible for their own actions, and you don’t have to let them control you.
Originally published at https://narcissistblog.online on July 20, 2022.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: iStockPhoto.com
