1. They are afraid.
When fantasy edges closer to reality, they chicken out. They like the “idea” of cheating, but they will never follow through.
AP Buyer’s Remorse
Backing out of an affair coward style
medium.com
2. They have a morals.
The ghoster might be overwhelmed with the ramifications of their choices.
“I am better than this!” they declare. They have a moral quandary to tackle.
Trying Adultery on For Size
Not Starting an Affair
medium.com
3. They are game players.
Some not-so-lovely cheaters like to toy with their victims/affair partners. They don’t have a conscience. Once their need for attention is met, then they bail.
Why This Player Stopped Playing
When a man had enough of adultery
medium.com
4. They avoid confrontation.
They don’t want to anger or upset their partner so they avoid it at all costs. Ghosting is easier than communicating their needs.
It’s Ghosting 101.
The “Fear of Being Ghosted” Syndrome
Knowing how to play the texting game when looking for a lover
medium.com
5. They feel guilty.
The ghoster is filled with guilt over their potential indiscretions.
Ah, the guilt Kings and Queens. My, how I despise them. My sociopathic tendencies have precluded endless remorse.
“I’m a cheetah!” I gleefully exclaim.
Guilt Kings and Queens
When they choke and can’t follow through
medium.com
6. They got caught.
Their lack of OPSEC got them.
The Myth of “Not Getting Caught”
OPSEC and other Lies
medium.com
7. They found someone else.
You were replaced.
I know you don’t want to hear it.
No good solution for this one. Guys, read this one below if you want some tips to keep her.
How To Please Your Lover in an Affair
Sex Tips for Guys
medium.com
8. They didn’t like you.
Scratch and sniff test not passed. They didn’t like how you looked. Or acted. Or whatever.
Don’t take it personally. There is someone for everyone. Even in this “lifestyle.” You shouldn’t fret too much — getting laid isn’t exactly rocket science.
Work on being confident. Knowing what you have to offer. BE the best you can be.
Being Too Thirsty Looking for a Lover
When you are parched but you can’t show it.
medium.com
9. They thought you were nuts.
Avoid being made into a lampshade at all costs.
That’s my motto.
If you are too weird, too creepy, or too crazy; you are getting ghosted.
The “ick” factor is real. Believe me. Read my Adult Friend Finder Fails below to get a hint of the nutso guys I came across in my search for a lover.
Adult Friend Finder Fails
My Sordid Search for a Lover
medium.com
10. They know you in “real life.”
I can’t tell you how many men I saw from my community on shady-as-fuck cheating sites.
“Hey, I actually know you,” I wrote. “I’d totally be on board but it is a little too close to home,” I explained.
“Wow. How?”
“School functions.”
“Our kids are the same age?” he asked.
“Yeah…and I’ve seen you in church. LOL. Believe me, I’ve always fantasized about you. It’s too damn bad we can’t hook up.”
“Might make it more exciting!” he answered.
“Thinking with your dick? Hmmm…haha. Nope. I can’t take the risk.”
There is a certain level of “too close for comfort” in adultery land. Also why I wouldn’t fuck my super hot neighbor.
TakeAway
These are some of the TOP ten motives why someone may ghost you. The reasons are like the 31 flavors of Baskin Robbins ice cream. Each day of the month has a different tasty concoction. Not so much in this lifestyle. We get plenty of tricks, not treats.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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