We take too much responsibility for our thoughts when controlling them is not only almost impossible and not helpful.
We don’t get up in the morning and say, I think I’ll think today and I’ll think this, this and this. That would be “controlling”. Us in the driver’s seat…
That isn’t reality.
Our Thoughts Come In Faster Than We Can Catch Them
Here is how it works. We have thoughts like a flash. They come in faster at times than the speed of light. Stopping a thought is like saying you can stop the speed of light.
That is how crazy at times this movement is to change your thoughts and take full responsibility. We again go overboard.
Our thoughts come in and we either attach to them or we don’t. We, most of the time, cannot stop an attachment from happening. It is too fast!
So actions often happen within – I was told by a PhD in human behavior – 40 milliseconds after the thought. Catch that one! Right?
No amount of meditation or self-help books can help control this. I’ve tried to prove I can indeed stop my actions, my thoughts. I was quickly proven wrong in a workshop 16 years ago when I was told: “We Aren’t Doing It”.
I rebelled and answered: NO WAY! I’m in control of my thoughts and behaviors. I do affirmations!
Then without much time we had an assignment to do and was asked the question among the 65 attendees “who wants to volunteer.”? I’m thinking in my head, No way I want to volunteer! Before that thought even finished in my mind, my hand was up in the air!
OMG! How did that happen? I didn’t even have in my mind to volunteer, I actually had the opposite thought. How did my hand go up?
Who Really Makes Our Decisions?
Our subconscious makes more than 70% of our decisions. It takes eight seconds for the conscious mind to know what that is. By that time, our actions have already happened.
Then we see the new age movement of “no victims” “take responsibility for our actions”.
We blame ourselves for everything that happens! We internalize it whether or not we choose to or not. We aren’t controlling ourselves the way all these books and webinars say we should.
We need to work harder on controlling our thoughts, our actions and take responsibility for our actions or nonaction.
Yet how responsible are we? Give the science of human behavior and how our brain works, not very responsible. In reality, WE ARE BEING DONE! I know, I had a hard time believing it too!
It took that event for me to “get it”! I didn’t tell my hand to go up! How is this possible?
So, again, it’s a balance. It isn’t taking these methods, ideologies too seriously and making hard science that in fact, IT IS THE WHOLE TRUTH! It is not. Most of life is paradoxical!
What Is Our Real Responsibility
What are we responsible for? Questioning our subconscious! Yes, this more often than not happens after the action or thought has passed. That’s it! We didn’t put the beliefs in our brain and we did not wire it into our subconscious. That’s another article!
We question our subconscious again and again until we can catch things by way of changing our subconscious by way of noticing ahead of time, by changing our subconscious we are changing how our subconscious makes the 70% of our decisions.
We can affirm all we want to that we are different, we are in control, we make our decisions, we can stop our thoughts and bang new ones in. The reality of it is, we don’t. Not until that part of our brain is reprogrammed and a new neuropathway is created!
Don’t take my word for it, experiment without bias, as I did. See what you notice.
Are We Still Responsible For It?
We take too much responsibility for our minds, our actions, and our behaviors. Do we still have to accept that some part of us did it, yes. Do we still have to hold ourselves accountable, yes! Do we still have to answer for it,yes!
Just don’t take something so complex within the human behavior and neuroscience of the brain and make it simple when indeed it is not! Just be curious about your mind watch it, like you would watching a small child create or discover something. Notice, write it down inquire it and continue until that thought just passes by unnoticed! The answer is simple, though it is NOT easy!
Our Minds Will Resist
We have our subconscious and sometimes conscious desire for our comfort zone and be prepared for resistance from your mind! It takes commitment, courage and being dedicated to change. Our minds can definitely sabotage our effort also. It’s protecting us.
Taking too much responsibility when it isn’t really ours, it’s an accumulation of society, our parents, the media, our peers and our experiences. We did not “PUT IT” in there. It just happened.
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