Jamie Reidy recounts an eye-opening trip to America’s newest family restaurant.
My parents never took me to Hooters when I was a kid. I guess you could say they ran a pretty tight ship.
Mom once wondered why I was always sleeping over my friends’ houses, but none of the guys ever wanted to sleep over our place. It didn’t take long for me to respond. “Uh, I have to go to bed before most fourth graders; we have cable, but I’m not allowed to watch MTV or R-rated movies; and we don’t have Atari, Intelevision or Colecovision.” In hindsight, we were practically Amish.
Sunday, for the first time since I discontinued therapy, I thought about those abuses my parents inflicted upon me. It’s one thing to deny an American boy his inalienable rights to primetime television, music videos and Donkey Kong, but it’s quite another to shield him from the wholesome dining experience that is Hooters.
I didn’t realize that the world-famous chicken wing chain is now considered fit for family fare. Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum really should target Hooters across the Super Tuesday states.
A close friend from Notre Dame was in Palm Springs for a conference, so we decided to meet halfway between there and Los Angeles. Chris told me to pick the place.
Considering he is the married father of two girls and three boys under 13, I thought he’d like to watch the NBA all-star game and enjoy a few beers in a kid-free zone. Being unfamiliar with anything in the “909”—hip cats in LA and the OC mock the residents of area code 909 as pick ’em up truck driving white trash—I consulted the Internet for a suitable location.
Thankfully, Hooters, Inc. has a helpful website, with a feature that allows the user to pinpoint the nearest restaurant to wherever he/she is in America!
I arrived before Chris, and immediately sighed with contentment. The nice thing about chain restaurants is the consistency; you, as a patron, always know what to expect. Hooters is no different: the smell of hot sauce…the wooden tables…shapely women putting themselves through veterinary school in complimentary tight, white tank tops, uncomplimentary short orange shorts, and horrible hose…the families.
The families???
Distrusting my own vision, I continued looking around the establishment in disbelief. But there was no getting around it: amidst the dozens of men drinking beer and ogling waitresses at the Ontario Hooters, five tables held adults with boys and/or girls under 12 years of age.
“They must’ve come here right after church services, huh?” Chris said as he plopped down in his chair. I snickered.
To our immediate left sat a grandmother, a mother and a grandson. I joked about how tough it must be for the sixth grader to refrain from stealing glances at the waitresses without his Nana or Mama catching him. Chris astutely pointed out that the kid didn’t have to steal glances; he was flat out staring, turning his head to follow a woman as she breezed past him. We waited for one of his female elders to smack him upside the head with a greasy hand, but it never happened.
Three tables away, a father in an Oakland Raiders jersey (perhaps no more needs to be said) sat with his son, who appeared to be nine. Periodically, the man would nudge the boy, smile lasciviously and point to a particular waitress.
Now, I’m no pediatrician and I’ve never taken a psychology class, but I have watched a lot of “Law and Order: SVU” and “Criminal Minds,” so I think I am sufficiently qualified to recognize the environment in which a a future criminal will develop. We should have called the FBI to alert them to the rare opportunity to watch a deviant mature.
Before leaving, the boy’s mother bought him the annual Hooters swimsuit calendar.
“What the hell are these people thinking?” I asked, discreetly checking out the token natural blonde. Chris rolled his eyes and pointed to a table I hadn’t seen. “Try explaining that,” he said.
I followed the direction of his finger and had to blink twice: two women seated at a table with three girls. We couldn’t tell if these were life partners with their kids or just two friends, but that’s irrelevant.
Why would two women bring young, impressionable girls to Hooters?!
I hoped this was a field trip, a feminist version of “Scared Straight”, the movie in which juvenile delinquent boys are brought into prison to meet with hardened cons who—hopefully—frighten the teens off their road to incarceration. Judging from the total lack of conversation between the women and girls, though, life lessons were not in session.
As we walked out, I had one last question for Chris. “So, is there a Hooters near your house?”
He nodded. “Ohhh, yeeeaaah.” Then he smiled and paused. “I can’t wait to tell my wife what a nice family restaurant Hooters has become. ‘It’s not at all like it used to be, Sweetie. There are grandmas there, and everything!’ Pfft. That should be an easy sell.”
Somehow, I don’t think my mom would buy it, either.
Photo courtesy of noelweathers
And since this thread went into a COMPLETELY different direction, I just want to point out that while I understand Christine and Erin and agree with a lot of what they say, and have been a little snarky when it came to the more extreme posters here, I do think that there’s nothing inherently wrong with Hooters, that the waitresses who work there are probably working very hard and should be admired for doing their job just like anyone else, and if you don’t like Hooters, stay away. Maybe it’s not the best thing for taking young girls and boys,… Read more »
@ J.E>. First of all I can hardly read your statements because they are so full of hate and nonsense. We are not trying to blame you for rapists or anorexia. We are asking men to look at the numbers of violence and sexual violence that are very high.. you cannot argue that fact. It’s not that all women don’t leave the house it’s that we are very aware, changing our m.o. we don’t wear our hair up in pony tails because an attacker has a greater advantage to grab you…we hold our keys out to stab someone in the… Read more »
> @ J.E>. First of all I can hardly read your statements because they are so full of hate and nonsense. I called it, didn’t I? Yep, I called it. No, my posts are not fully of hate, let alone nonsense. My posts are full of truth. > We are asking men to look at the numbers of violence and sexual violence that are very high.. you > cannot argue that fact. Oh, but we’ve already looked at the numbers that are very high, and like I’ve been explaining again and again, we found them to be: FALSE! You see,… Read more »
@JG : All I can really say is that I feel bad for you. You have such a warped view of our actual intentions. Our intentions are not to “demonize you or male sexuality” Our goals are to help reduce the number of violent incidences in the world currently the statistics are that in our nation 1 in 5 women report being sexually assaulted and if that is not enough sexual and domestic violence are the two most under- reported crimes. http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/15/health/nearly-1-in-5-women-in-us-survey-report-sexual-assault.html I hope that you can understand that we are not attacking you! Women want to feel safe and… Read more »
Bullshit! If 1 in 5 were actually being sexually assaulted, you, and 99% of the other women, would never leave your house. Third world most violent jails don’t have that kind of rape numbers. You would safer in a bloody war zone. “1 in 5” is nothing but massaging the numbers, leading questions, if not outright making up the numbers. You know how they get these numbers? “Has a man, including your partner, ever touched your sexual organs without asking explicit permission first?” “Has a man, including your partner, ever penetrated your vagina our anus, no matter how slight, without… Read more »
“Oh, nose!” –I think you meant “oh noes!” 🙂 And if you’re all about the many offspring, where do gay men, bi men and women, and lesbians fit into this? What about mostly straight women who also get incredibly turned on by vaginas and breasts, such as myself? A vagina on a beautiful woman won’t impregnate me or provide me care for the children I birth, but looking at one can sure give me an amazing orgasm. And why bring up the rapist thing? It’s a well known mantra within most of feminism that the only people who thing that… Read more »
>“Oh, nose!” –I think you meant “oh noes!” 🙂 No, I didn’t. > And if you’re all about the many offspring, where do gay men, bi men and women, and > lesbians fit into this? What about mostly straight women who also get incredibly turned on > by vaginas and breasts, such as myself? A vagina on a beautiful woman won’t impregnate > me or provide me care for the children I birth, but looking at one can sure give me an > amazing orgasm. Every brain has male and female traits, you understand this, right? Well, the more male… Read more »
Erin and Christine: I think when it comes to young girls, we should be more positive oriented and continue to stress the fact that there are many different ways to be beautiful (inside and out). The eating disorder thing was mentioned above. It is a serious issue. I developed a series of VERY serious eating disorders at the age of 10 and it continued to around 13-14. I’m not going to blame the frat boys and geezers who go to Hooters for it, but I do wish that there were programs or people in my life who drilled it into… Read more »
> Erin and Christine: I think when it comes to young girls, we should be more positive oriented and > continue to stress the fact that there are many different ways to be beautiful (inside and out). Yes… which has got what to do with men or families going to Hooters again? Oh, yeah, NOTHING! If children are raised right by their PARENTS, and taught this stuff, but also enough sexual education to understand that people like to look at sexy people, taking them to Hooters is no problem at all; just like all the magazines would be no problem… Read more »
Ummm…You seriously sound bitter. I don’t like to make personal comments like this, but the tone of your comment really makes you come off as more angry than trying to engage in conversation or light sarcasm. I even said…that men value more than looks but will still look…so will women, although in different ways. I never said anything about men being eunuchs or not looking, just to be respectful about it, when it comes to someone you love–and to smack my ass and grab my tittays the hardest at the end of the day :p. I was simply talking about… Read more »
Bitter. I wonder why. Nothing but comments about the vile men looking at women. And here again. “So will women, although in different ways.” Yeah, women do it more wholesome, they’re sweeter about it, they always keep respect in mind, they’re never disrespectful. Girls must be raised even more positive, on top of the feminized school system that does nothing but encourage and push girls, while destroying boys. I suppose don’t need positive views, right? No need to teach them they’re more than an ATM machine and a beast of burden, no need to teach them they are more than… Read more »
“stress the fact that there are many different ways to be beautiful (inside and out)” We could just be honest with ourselves and face the fact that some people are beautiful and some are smart, and some are athletic, etc. Not everyone is beautiful, so what? Beauty needs to stop being the most important thing in our society, then we won’t spend so much time beating ourselves up over how good-looking we are. Also, men(hetero) are NOT at fault for perceived pressure to look like Kate Moss, as other commenters already pointed out, men don’t as a rule value that… Read more »
I never said to blame men (I specifically said I do NOT–and at 10 years old, I didn’t even know too many men who went to Hooters or what Playboy was). In my pre-adolescent head, I just thought I didn’t look right, even though I’m sure I did. I specifically said that what random dudes I’ll never come in contact with hitting up a Hooters is NOT to blame, but just that it would have been nice to have more programs and positive influences. I just want to promote confidence and a positive body image among girls and women, and… Read more »
And it won’t stop being important because there’s so much money to be made from the beauty industry. I’m personally guilty of spending too much money on nice lotions and makeup that doesn’t look like makeup, I’ll admit. Others buy weight loss or weight gain products. Others do botox or plastic surgery. Others get facials and expensive haircuts and spiky hair hair gel and manis and pedis and go tanning and buy magazines telling you how to be look better (men and women do this). There’s just too much money to be made there.
Yeah, Elizabeth Hasselbeck’s 3 beautiful children with her football player husband are proof of just how ‘infertile’ she is. 🙂
Going against consistent peer-reviewed, impartial actual physical research, just makes you look stupid.
Trying to do it with a celebrity female wife on site for men, where the average men won’t give a rat’s ass about gossip is entirely pointless and ineffective to boot.
@j.e. The slut walks are actually upholding male intelligence saying that all men are not animals and that they can control themselves. Rape is not about sex it is about power and control. We are putting the focus on the perpertrator because just like any crime that is the only way you can solve it you can’t talk about burglaries and not talk about the theives… This should be obvious. You can’t solve a problem by jut focusing on the victim. As for sexual attraction we are not trying to deny you the right to be sexually attracted the female… Read more »
Nonsense. Slutwalks spend their time saying MEN should just teach MEN not to rape. It is painting ALL men as rapists unless “good” men teach the normal men from “controlling themselves”. It is a misandry of epic proportions. Men are rapists, unless they “control themselves” meaning that their default state is rape, rape, and rape some more, but you might just hope as a woman the man you came across is in the mood to control himself this day. It is a vile, sexist, and hateful statements. Men don’t need to control themselves, because men have no desire to rape.… Read more »
Thank you Erin. You can explain it so much better that I can… I get too frustrated. Have you heard of a documentary called Miss Representation? You might like it.
@Wetsuit one, This is your comment and this is the type of thinking that gets us into problems: “Women are the objects of heterosexual males. Always have been. ALways will be. NOTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE THIS. EVER!!!! ” I don’t know how I could expect men, that are so privileged, to be aware of the multitude of issues that women face. Forgive me, I thought this would be a place of intelligent discussion, not another website where a women is thrown down for speaking her mind and her comments called “bitchy” You don’t even know the extent of the… Read more »
I agree. Male sexuality is far from demonized. It is celebrated every where I turn. Female sexuality is much more demonized. Even in pretty women. Women get called far more names for their sexuality then men do. And if you are a woman that isn’t stereotypcially attractive by the the classic Hooters/Playboy/Maxim-type woman-girl. You are screwed. You’re not even allowed to have a sexuality. Or you are just written off as “insecure”, “jealous”..or whatever because you dared to express the reality of how women are stereotyped for male pleasure and the pressure women are under to look a certain way… Read more »
No, of course not, male sexuality isn’t demonized! I must just be mistaken about the commercials on tv, on the net, and the posters everywhere in frigging grade schools in boys toilets, reducing men to born vile rapists – unless you raise them extremely right and extremely strict. No, when a father takes his child to a public park, he doesn’t have to worry about people calling the cops on him! No, it wasn’t being a man with a child that was the problem, it was the non-existent drugs falling out of his pocket that was the problem! And where… Read more »
Erin: To that, all I can say is that the shoe is now on the other foot. Walk in it awhile and see how you like it.
Women have been demanding that men meet their impossible and unreasonable standards for quite some time now. We’re tired of jumping through hoops. Don’t like being judged according to men’s standards? Now you know how we feel.
Calls to loosen up on those requirements and treat each other decently will go unheard until BOTH sides acknowledge what they’ve been doing. So far, feminism doesn’t permit that.
Hooters is great for kids, not a damn thing wrong with it. If you women like your own version with hot men as waiters in skimpy outfits, just open one, then expand it into a chain. The only way hooters could become a successful chain is if there were enough sexy women with hooters to be the waitresses and enough people go their to spend their money. The same would be true for a restaurant with hot men in skimpy clothes. Which makes any claim about “we” doing anything, like it’s an institutionalized demand ridiculous. Simple fact is, people like… Read more »
I’m mystified that anyone would go to a place like Hooters. I seems to me a symptom of a society freaked out by sex – so much that even the eroticism of the human body can only be admired in a place outside the normal social context. It fits with a society where the idea that women have sex and use contraception can somehow be controversial.
No, it fits in a society where men’s sexuality, and them enjoying looking at beautiful women is demonized, and shameful, that they can only do it in a place that has been safe to do so, cordoned off for people that would do the demonizing and shaming.
Yup. Same thing. A society where sex is so shameful it has to be kept in isolation, so to speak. So parents will take their kids to Hooters, but will balk at the idea that their teenage daughter has her boyfriend sleep over at their house.
Thank you for this, Lars. People are so shocked by sexuality (particularly with women) and real humans showing off their bodies, but are ok with manufactured gawking.
I agree with your point Jamie. @Gordon I am not angry or judging these women. A lot of women have been objectified for so long by society or someone they know that they begin to believe that their body is their worth. I am angry that these institutions simply exist to focus on the female body. We need to move away from seeing women only for their sexual display and more on their other qualities like intelligence, personality, creativity and leadership. There is a survey that says 1/3 of women would trade their intelligence for bigger breasts. This is a… Read more »
Oh for God’s sake!!!! Then get out there and lead (like Hillary Clinton, like Condi Rice, like Pelosi, etc. etc. etc.), and win nobel prizes in science (not that I can name a woman off the cuff, other than Marie Curie), write plays (Vagina Monologues comes to mind) and create stuff (Lady Gaga comes to mind). WOmen do all this other business. Men will still like hot women and will always value them. Women have options to do whatever the hell they want. Some choose things you don’t like. It doesn’t mean they aren’t valued for anything else. Jeezus, this… Read more »
Thanks for expressing the concept, WSO. No matter how many times feminists demand it, no matter how many women patiently explain that they’re “offended,” men are simply NOT going to apologize for enjoying female beauty. We’re not going to hide it, either, and we’re not going to be shamed out of it.
“Don’t try to change me, baby. That’s the serum’s job.”
–Dr. Henry Jekyll–
Just because men like to look at women, doesn’t mean they don’t value their other attributes as well. And if you want intelligence to be valued, you might want to try getting intelligence to be valued period. It’s not valued in neither men nor women in large swaths of the population. The US is the least academically able country in the western world, yet it carries the most confident people. Creationism gets taught in schools. In colleges around the country, the alpha “sciences” most populated by women, teach there are no facts, only sliding view points. They get taught not… Read more »
Well said! Intelligence is undervalued across both genders! Think of the fact that most people only use a few thousand words from the dictionary on a regular basis, where as people like Shakespeare used well over 30,000 words regularly.
Gordon, I agree with everything you said.
My major point was simply that Hooters is NOT suitable for kids, and I can’t believe parents bring their children there.
You know… I always have difficulty understanding the negativity people have towards any of these establishments. Someone calling (and I’m not sure which the above comment referred to, and I dont think it matters which) the restaurant, the outfits, or the women themselves “disgusting and degrading”. Mainly my difficulty comes from the fact that people CHOOSE where to work. So, if you claim that the restaurant is disgusting or degrading, I think your not only saying that of the restaurant but of the women who choose to work there. To that I take offense. You’re demeaning someone for choosing a… Read more »
Remember Gordon, a woman’s choice isn’t a good enough one unless every other woman agrees with it. How Hooters can get called out when it’s the standard, the norm in every part of the hospitality industry is beyond me. Go to ANY restaurant and the female servers (and probably male ones as well, but I don’t really notice male servers) are more attractive than average. That’s just the way IT IS. EVERYWHERE! As for the disrepectful comments, that happens to women everywhere no matter what they’re wearing (remember the articles where women bitched about that too?). There’s nothing much really… Read more »
Gordon, I agree that the women who work there shouldn’t be described as “disgusting”. But if someone thinks that The Hooters waitress is being degraded, that’s their right. Just because they choose to work there doesn’t mean I have to give the establishment a thumbs up. Which I don’t. I think Hooters is basically soft core porn eating. Sure, you might be able to see a woman wearing even less out in public but at least there isn’t a whole place dedicated to it in broad daylight that gives the illusion of being a “family place”. I take offense that… Read more »
I would hope that there are no parents taking their children to a restaurant as a “right of passage”. I would like to think they go there for good food, or a fun atmosphere. But I haven’t been so I cannot comment on either. You are correct that the father/mothers actions set precedent and teach their children how they (the parent) view women. I would argue that the parents and grand-parents that brought them to these restaurants and did not tell their kid “hey, check her out” were setting a fine example. They showed the children that you can see… Read more »
That’s true. We all flirt. Your girlfriend sounds awesome. For me, what works best if my man flirts is him letting me know that I’m the hottest bitch in the world to him–and I make sure to let him know the same. 🙂
I tell her that so much you think she’d be sick of hearing it! 😉
I didn’t really expect to write such a long response in return but clearly I felt the need to. Gordon, I think men that take their sons to Hooters do infact do it as a “right of passage”. The old boys club. Boys being boys. Bounding over treating young pretty women like objects. Sly little winks and nudges and “check out her son, isn’t she beautiful”. Question is, where is Mom in all this? How does a man’s relationship with the child’s mother come into play when grown men go to ogle other women with their own sons? What message… Read more »
I’ll admit, I never expect to write such long responses. But I do enjoy a good debate especially when playing devil’s advocate. I’m trying not to sound combative, as I don’t entirely disagree with what you’re saying. I take a difficult position, as I don’t meet the criteria of one of the stereotypical men you continuously describe. I don’t place a woman into a role of “homemaker”, we share in chores. I coexist with my partner, sharing responsibilities. There are many men who don’t value women for more than their looks, AND this type of restaurant caters specifically towards them… Read more »
Oh, there we go: “Women are less inclined, bla bla, yackidy smackidy.” BULL! Women ogle men every bit as much, no, more so. I’ve been part of a forum for a tv show that happened to have a lot of hot men on there, and the majority of the fandom was women. Trust me, the shit women said/wrote about the hot men, men wouldn’t say about hot women if their lives depended on it. Women are no less crass, and love no less to ogle hot men, and talk about their asses and other assets. Hell, there was even a… Read more »
Yeah, I clearly enjoy a good debate too Gordon. Can’t fault you for that. 🙂 My attempt wasn’t really to put women into the role of “homemaker”. I wasn’t using examples of a woman being at home doing the laundry as a commentary on feminism and stereotypical gender roles. My point is more of the idea that while men are out with their sons taking them to Hooters, it is unlikely that there will ever be a time when your wife is out with your daughter taking her to Looters. 🙂 I do not think that whatever lack of visual… Read more »
First I’d have to note that it is very unusual of us, two seemingly non-stereotypical people debating the behaviors of stereotypical people. As far as teaching a child about body types, I’d much rather take them to Hooters over McDonalds. I don’t think any restaurant would advertise “come here to see how women SHOULD look”. And I don’t think Hooters is an exception to that. They typically higher those women who are busty (though from my friends opinions, females mind you, they have yet to go to a Hooters where they were impressed by their breast size), but doesn’t promote… Read more »
I think it is ridiculous that they actually have a public restaurant named after women’s breasts. I think it is disgusting and degrading. There are no restaurants that have men serving in extremely tight and short clothes??!! especially ones that are considered “family oriented” Imagine if they had a restaurant that had all black servers dressed in slave clothing…”oh it’s only in good fun, they are just earning money to save up for college” You would never expect that level of disrespect for any other group of people. Our culture normalizes sexism and the sexualization of women and girls. Any… Read more »
Aya, your boyfriend is a smart man!
I’ve been to Hooters. I like their food. Most of the customers I’ve seen are older men. But bringing children in? They’re impressionable. I rather frown at the man who encourages his 9 year old boy to blatantly disrespect women. It’s a child like that who goes on to become a teenager and starts sexually harassing his female peers because his dad is not properly teaching him respect. There’s a difference between looking and appreciating beauty, but the examples given show complete disregard for that woman as a person.
My parents took me to Hooters as a young girl, but I was a little naive and young to fully understand the whole situation, although still curious. It’s very possible they just thought it was another restaurant and just as naive as I was. Later, at around 18 or 19 years old, my boyfriend and a bunch of his male friends and I all went to Hooters. They spent the entire time complaining about the food. Their cheese fries were apparently Kraft singles layered overy soggy fries. Oh the horror. The sad thing is, even as a graduate student who’s… Read more »
Bringing young girls into Hooters sets the bar pretty low in terms of “you can be objectified like this someday, too, honey!” I went to the Original Lingerie Bowl, which was played at the LA Coliseum at halftime of the Super Bowl. My friend had free sideline passes. We would not have driven half an hour if we had to pay for that nonsense; we’re too cheap. Anyways, it was a blast… but it was unnerving to see a lot of families with girls there. “Maybe someday, Cindy, people will pay to see you get tackled in the mud in… Read more »
Great stuff, Jamie. This reminds me of the “Undercover Boss” episode where the CEO of Hooters was flabbergasted to learn that the public’s perception of his company was that it was sleazy. I’m fine with Hooters existing in the world, but let’s accept it for what it is and not pretend it’s perfectly normal to bring children there!
It’s so common nowadays to see women with boob jobs: at the gym, at many restaurants, Disney World…..you name it….men are going to stare or not stare (depending on how well they can conceal it)….! My husband told me a story about going out to the local Hooters with a bunch of co-workers after work….there was a table of men with a 5 year old boy….the waitress was charmed by the boy and chatted him up….then as she was walking away the boy said something really rude, like “Nice —-!” (You can insert whatever body part you think is appropriate… Read more »
I welcome this shift. It shows our culture is making progress away from the phase when men were expected to be ashamed of their interest in attractive women and apologize for showing interest in sex.