First things first! Let’s all rise and salute all the strong women of each and every nation, culture, creed and ethnicity. From Harriet Tubman to Helen Keller, from Oprah Winfrey to Martha Stewart and to all the strong women in our own families and communities.
A Made Woman
Turbulent childhoods, poverty, abuse and discrimination are just some of the most common conditions that women continue to endure. In doing so, it invokes an inner strength that helps them to survive these challenging conditions. The result is, a strong woman who’s strength is inspiring to some and intimidating to others.
She’s the eldest daughter, raised in a single parent home with two other siblings. In order to help her family survive, she forgoes her childhood to take on the adult responsibilities of helping her mother with raising her younger siblings and working jobs after school to help bring money to feed the family.
She’s the single mother, recently divorced, who works two jobs to support her and the baby, while attending night school to help provide better living conditions for them both.
She’s the businesswoman who braves the treacherous terrain of the corporate jungle while battling sexual harassment, discrimination and all the other socially induced female stereotypes.
Photo by Austrian National Library on Unsplash
Relationships
These strong women have accomplished so much and have made remarkable achievements. However, you may find that many of them are single or unhappy in their current relationships. But why?
They’re accomplished, they’re beautiful and desire to have a healthy relationship with love and intimacy. However, their attempts seem to just bring about a string of break-ups and bad memories. What’s the trouble?
Photo by Zachary Kadolph on Unsplash
The Challenge
Strong woman, it’s not a fault that you’re strong, assertive and enduring. It’s who you are, who you have become. Knowing this about yourself, will require you to be consciously selective when entering a relationship with a potential mate. This is a challenge you will face, but the reward of a strong, healthy relationship will be well worth if you can properly analyze the following scenarios:
Strong Woman — Weak Man: When a strong woman enters a relationship with a weak man or one who’s not as strong as she is, it seems all good in the beginning because the woman is used to being in control. She get’s little to no resistance, as the weaker man never challenges nor questions her ideas or opinions. As the relationship progresses, a strong woman will soon lose respect for the weaker man and his submissiveness to her will. Soon the intimacy disappears, the resentment builds and the relationship becomes a boring, burden to her. So, she cuts her loses and chooses to let it go and move on.
Strong Woman — Strong Man: When a strong woman enters a relationship with an equally strong man, their personalities seem to compliment one another in the beginning, but soon the headbutting begins. An established woman, with a strong will and personality, will find herself in an ongoing power struggle with the masculine energies of her mate. Furthermore, the equally strong man doesn’t want to feel weak nor submissive so he continues his attempts to claim dominance in their relationship.
In these instances, the strong woman’s awareness of her own financial independence, self reliance and inner strength, doesn’t allow for an even an equally strong man, to so easily impress his will upon her and their relationship. Soon, they grow weary of sparring with each other and they both just throw in the towels and go their separate ways.
Photo by David Suarez on Unsplash
Consider This
See, a strong woman knows her strengths in the areas of intelligence, courage, endurance and wisdom. Especially, when she’s already attained financial independence, social status and other stellar achievements. So, the type if man she will likely be able to establish a lasting relationship with is, an equally strong man.
When a strong woman enters a relationship with a stronger man, this does not mean she has to become less than who she is. Neither does she have to reside in his shadow. A strong man will not be intimidated by a strong will and personality. In fact, he will encourage it and nourish it because he’s already secure in the strengths of his own manhood.
The strong woman and the strong man, soon establish a mutual respect for one another which is a requirement of any successful relationship. The strong woman can find happiness and comfort in a relationship where her strength is celebrated. In response to this, a strong woman knows the value of a stronger man so she reciprocates by allowing the man to be stronger and allow him to help her bare some of the weight of life she’s been carrying on her shoulders for oh, so long. She’s then freed from the burden of having to always be the stronger person.
Photo by Tiraya Adam on Unsplash
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism | Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box | The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer | What We Talk About When We Talk About Men |
—
Photo credit: Etty Fidele on Unsplash