Is fate in charge, or are we? John Picciuto says it doesn’t matter.
How do you define fate? How do you describe how or why everything happens for a reason? Am I alone in feeling that sometimes in life it appears as if absolutely nothing is working in some grand scheme? I highly doubt it. At times it appears to me that there is no discernible difference between what one may call fate and what I’ll just describe as life being life. Is fate meeting a significant other? Is it missing a train and taking a later train? Are all things predetermined? Can it fall down to everything in life you’ve done, like the college you attended or the summer camp you went to?
Am I alone in feeling that life is sometimes difficult to feel as if we have a chosen path or a predetermined route? Hardly. I feel like there is this perpetual state of second-guess-hood that we in our twenties find ourselves in. Should we backpack through Europe, or take that internship at a major bank?
It’s all of these instances of choices and gut feelings that we either accept or ignore, and slowly but surely we find ourselves second-guessing the very choices we make. At least I do. But, when is it that you land in the state of complacency and feel as if you’ve arrived exactly where you’re meant to be, exactly when you’re meant to be there?? That’s the day I’m looking forward to. The day when I wake up and realize that I’ve somehow landed in the proper place at the proper time, but I have a sneaky suspicion that such a feeling will elude me for much of my life. And maybe that is the point. It could be the one feeling or the one driving force that allows someone to second-guess the choices they make and perhaps push them further or harder or closer to the person they want to be. Maybe that feeling of arrival is exactly what we as a people seek daily, and weekly, and yearly that puts us in place to be in the position we’re supposed to be, exactly when we should be.
Life is made up of moments and choices, and usually it’s the subtle mundane experiences that echo the most when you’re looking back on things. You have lots of choices to make and lots of decisions to be had, but stressing over the implications of those matters are not worth your headaches. It can oftentimes feel as if your world is spinning out of control. You may frequently find yourself in scenarios or situations in which you feel lost, alone, and without hope. You’re not alone. Everyone has felt this way at some point in their life, and it’s the friends and family in your life who will help you get through these situations.
We are so truly blessed for the limited amount of time that we have with the people in our lives that we often take for granted the days we spend with them. We get bogged down in our negativity that we forget about Tuesday night dinner with our family. We ignore movies we see with our friends. And all the while, at the drop of a hat, any one of them can be taken from us at any moment, and we don’t take the time to reflect on how truly lucky we are to have the people in our lives that we have. It’s that duality of life and death that brings a certain level of appreciation for the people in our lives and the loved ones we get to spend it with. It’s only when people are lost, that we truly appreciate what we had.
So, what does it all mean? Are we in control of our lives, or is everything already written with no concept of self-control or ability to alter our destinies?
I’m here to unequivocally say that it doesn’t matter. You can debate until you’re blue in the face about every possibility surrounding life and fate and love and destiny, and it doesn’t matter. If you get fired from a job that wasn’t satisfying to you anyway — or if you breakup with a long-time significant other — it’s going to be okay.
The simple fact of the matter is that life is a journey and life is a struggle. It’s possible that your moments of happiness may be grossly outnumbered by the moments of sadness, but that’s what makes those special moments all the more sacred.
I’m always up late at night unable to sleep, because I’m busy contemplating things like: What should I be doing with my life? When or if I’m going to find my soulmate. Am I happy where I’m at? Should I have taken this job or that job? The truth is we’ve become concerned with things, and status, and money, and success derived from what our money can buy instead of putting ourselves down a path or a road that leads to our satisfaction.
What I say to you is: Find your passion, and follow your path to that decision. There is no worse feeling than lying in bed at night unable to discover happiness from your day. Do what makes you happy, and things like fate and your worries will drift away.