I am now a grandmother of three little girls. Naturally, like all mothers and grandmothers, I want for them the best the World has to offer, with no gender limitations on what they choose to do with their lives.
I have always believed that women can and should reach for the stars, but I grew up in an era when gender roles were defined. Little girls were to look pretty and be seen and not heard. My mother did not put much stock in the pretty part, saying, “Pretty is as pretty does.” She encouraged us to be useful and to “do the right thing.” There was a sense that what other people thought was always of concern.
I grew up on a farm. My brothers worked the fields with the men, and we girls were expected to follow in the footsteps of our mother and grandmothers. This meant learning to “keep house.” In other words, we were to cook, wash and iron clothes, sweep and mop floors, maybe learn to sew, and help care for younger siblings.
By a certain age, girls were also expected to “Find a good man and settle down.” That meant girls were to get married and have a home and family of their own. No one wanted to be called a spinster or old maid.
I had no interest in any of the above. I was what used to be called a “Tomboy.” I could be found in the fields with the guys when not in school. I learned to drive a tractor, truck, and car before I was 12 years old. Even today, I prefer standard transmission vehicles. All that gear shifting is far more fun!
I began my formal education in a two-room school with grades 1–4 in one room and 5–7 in the other room. There were no other options for black kids growing up in Elberon, Virginia, in 1948.
Yet, my life trajectory is a testament that the beginning does not necessarily determine the final destination. There are lots of twists and turns and opportunities that present themselves along any given path. There are also obstacles, roadblocks, and detours that force us to fight to get where we want to go.
Women’s Struggle For Equality
It has taken a long time, hard fights, and historical movements for women to be heard and to carve out their rightful place in society. I have heard men say that women want to take over, be men, and take away men’s rights and historically defined provider roles. Men of my generation still mumble that society’s breakdown falls at the feet of women working outside the home!
NO! NO! NO! Even the most ardent feminists would say these are not the intentions of women fighting for gender equality. Women are saying that women’s rights are fundamental human rights that include the right to live free from violence, slavery, and discrimination. We also have the right to be educated, vote, and earn a fair and equal wage.
Women’s reproductive rights include the right to legal and safe abortion, birth control, to be free from coerced sterilization and contraception. Access to quality reproductive healthcare should be a given. There should be nothing controversial about any of this. The problem is that women are often excluded from the discussions, policy decisions, and laws that govern them and their bodies. Such decisions have been the purview of men.
It is maddening that these inhuman, archaic positions remain today in many parts of the World and are still perpetuated and staunchly upheld by men! Men, you need to get your knees off the backs and wombs of women! And women, we need to continue our fight for our rightful place in our World, not just arbitrary supportive players in our own life’s drama.
Every woman and every girl must be allowed to unlock her potential to learn, work, earn, and invest in the future. It is past time to close all gender gaps and to end racial and sexual harassment against women.
Of course, I would be remiss if I did not point out that women of color have an even more challenging uphill climb to get justice and equality. Black Women’s battles against sexual harassment in the workplace shaped Sexual Harassment Law. Landmark cases helped define sexual harassment as a civil-rights violation that harms women as a group.
Black women winning sexual harassment cases against employers led to the Supreme Court’s unanimous 1986 decision that sexual harassment was a violation of the Civil Rights Act.
When Anita Hill testified in front of a Senate Panel of men about lewd sexual harassment by Clarence Thomas, it brought the term “sexual harassment into public discourse. As we know, despite her allegations and believable testimony, Clarence Thomas ended up on the Supreme Court anyway. His 29-year tenure on the court has proven unremarkable, except for his positions on civil rights and women’s rights. One example is his opinion regarding a woman’s “right to know,” a case in which he wrote the majority 5 judge opinion. In brief, he wrapped his opinion around freedom of speech, a tried and true tactic, when the decision was really about further disenfranchising and depriving women of their rights around basic healthcare and abortion services.
Being a Supreme Court Justice is a powerful position to hold. Just think about it. NINE people are holding sway in their political hands, decisions that impact over 330 million people. And because the Supreme Court is so polarized politically, it negatively impacts the whole concept of Democracy, a form of representative government based upon the principles of majority rule and individual rights.
Women are under-represented in the Supreme Court, in Congress, and in Corporate Boardrooms. Of interest is that some women in positions of power often take positions contrary to all women’s broader interests. For example, women did not have a voice in the confirmation of Clarence Thomas, accused of sexual harassment, but they did in the confirmation of Brett Kavanaugh, also accused of sexual harassment.
Susan Collins, with the support of her Republican female colleagues, Senators Cindy Hyde-Smith and Shelley Moore Capito, put politics above giving voice to women’s struggle with male dominance and sexual mistreatment. Just as Anita Hill was ridiculed and her accusations diminished by the all-male committee, so it was with Christine Blasey Ford, only this time with the help of WOMEN inside and outside the halls of Congress.
Despite these unfavorable outcomes, the public discourse in both cases gave millions of women the freedom to talk about the abuse they continue to endure.
Perhaps unknown, but it was a Black woman, Tarana Burke, who began the “Me Too” movement in 2006 to raise awareness of women who had been abused. It took wealthy, white celebrities, a decade or more later, to say “me too” for this kind of sexual harassment in the workplace to get the attention it has always deserved.
It is essential to recognize that the movement to address the discrimination, abuse, harassment, and general degradation of women results from the collective labor of women, but particularly women of color. I think it fair to say that racism and sexism are inextricably intertwined.
Right now, at this moment in time, March 2021, we see evidence of this dynamic in play. President Biden, living up to his promise to diversify his cabinet, has nominated a diverse group of highly qualified women and men: White, Black, Latino, Native American, Indian American, and Asian American.
Of particular interest is that the women of color are facing an ugly uphill battle to be confirmed by a majority male Senate. One has been forced to withdraw her name.
Instead of focusing on their qualifications for the positions for which they have been nominated, Senators are falling back on their usual divisive language. Such words as “radical” or “dangerous” or “antisemitic” are being used to characterize some women nominees. Even going so far as to talk about a lack of “civility” based on Twitter postings or other public statements nominees have made is ludicrous in light of their own behavior.
Listening to these Republican Senators (very hard to do for very long), I can’t help but wonder where they were during the four-year reign of Donald Trump. The Twitter posts and public speeches of the latter were anything but civil. Yet, these same Senators supported him unconditionally.
Motivation For Obstructionist Behavior…
I am certainly aware that Republican obstruction is what they do. Still, since Policy is not a Republican strong suit, I suspect there are other reasons for delaying or not confirming President Biden’s nominees. Wherein Republican Senators Collins, Murkowski, Portman, and Romney have supported all of the nominees that have been confirmed, Josh Harley and Ted Cruz, the insurrectionist supporters, have voted against 12 and 11 of the 13 confirmed Cabinet nominees, respectively. Other supporters of Trump have also voted against most nominees so far. They may have a different agenda, but their support of Trump suggests that racism and sexism play a large part in their decisions. The other possibility is that they all support overthrowing democracy and support a minority totalitarian form of governing.
The point here is not to reiterate what you already know, but to emphasize how important it is to call out racism and sexism whenever and wherever it occurs. It is not enough to passively allow distractions to cover up the real motives behind the behaviors we see every day.
It is not a coincidence that these same senators giving President Biden’s Cabinet nominees a hard time are ardent supporters of the disgraced racist, sexist, misogynist Ex-President. They are the first to scream that they are none of these things, but the vigorous denials say a lot. My grandfather used to say that if you throw a stone in a flock of chickens, you don’t have to wonder which one it hit because that one will jump up and squawk. Who squawked louder about not being racist and loving women than Donald Trump?
Moving Forward
As we move forward as a nation, it becomes increasingly important for women to continue to compete for positions of power where historically, their voices have been silenced. I must note here that there are many men fighting for women and their rights. We need to embrace that support and become allies in the fight for equality.
A Personal Story
I grew up in Virginia, in the era of segregation. I went to all-Black schools through my sophomore year in college. I left school to escape an impending marriage and moved to New York to live with an aunt in Harlem.
That was an exciting time for me. I was exposed to a whole new world, a world of black businesses, black lawyers, doctors, bankers, black museums, etc. With a short bus or subway ride, I could enter an integrated world without restrictions on where I had to sit, go to the bathroom, or eat. I could go to the theatre and sit wherever I wanted.
I acclimated rather quickly and learned to negotiate these different worlds with ease. I worked several jobs before being hired at Chase Manhattan Bank, located at 1 Chase Plaza, which hired me to work on the Training Staff to assist in teaching secretarial skills.
The workspace was a vast open room on the 24th floor with a narrow hallway at one end. There were no partitions. The external walls were all glass with spectacular views of lower Manhattan. The woman in charge of that department had a Katherine Gibbs degree. It was evident to me that she was the supervisor. It was not clear to those employees who came for training, which bothered her so much she had the Bank install an office for her and placed my desk outside her door. The Bank only agreed to a glass partition, but for her, this was sufficient. She wanted to define our roles.
I decided to return to college when the Bank hired another young woman to work with us. After about a week on the job, she too decided she needed to be walled off. It was all so silly because she ended up with a glass partition at the end of that narrow hallway with an “office” barely large enough for a desk and chair.
But the perception was important to both of them! Having what appeared to be an office elevated their status and minimized mine. It was merely to avoid the perception that we were equals.
So I quit my day job to return to school and was hired by the Bank to teach an officers’ training course at night. I enrolled in City College New York. I decided in my senior year to switch from psychology to Speech Pathology. Suddenly an obstacle in my path! I had a professor tell me, “You’ll never be a speech pathologist with your southern accent.” Well, first of all, I didn’t have a southern accent, and secondly, I thought, “I’ll show him!”
And, of course, this wasn’t about him; it was about me and whether or not I was going to listen to this nonsense. I did not. I graduated, applied to Teachers College, Columbia University, and was accepted and given a scholarship. Retaining my scholarship was critical to be able to continue. And so it was “nose to the grindstone” to meet undergrad and graduate requirements as quickly as possible. And I did. It took me three semesters to complete all the undergrad and graduate course and practicum requirements to get my Master of Science in Speech Pathology and Audiology.
That professor’s little voice in my ear motivated me throughout my doctoral studies and even later when I joined the faculty at Teachers College, Columbia University.
And so I say to young women and men, do not allow others to define who you are. You will encounter naysayers along the way, but stay focused on your goals, work hard, and prove to yourself that you have what it takes to get where you want to go.
And remember success means different things to different people. We all have different paths, wants, needs and desires. Be true to yourself. Know yourself and know your value as a human being. Be willing to fight and stand up for what you believe. You do not have to accept the roles assigned to you. Be supportive of one another.
Climbing But Not There Yet!
During the 2020–21 election cycle, women stood up and said, “Enough is enough! We see what is happening in our country, and we’re not sitting out this election!” And WOW, did they turn out! They ran for office, and against great odds and obstacles, they voted in record numbers. This year, in 2021, a record number of women are serving in the 117 Congress.
Still, only 144 of 435 members are women, and of the 100 Senators, only 25 are women. Is it any wonder that women’s healthcare, abortion rights, equal pay rights, childcare, climate change, gun safety, voting rights, and other important issues to women are constantly under attack in Congress?
For these women, who are stepping up from all walks of life, it is about more than simply shifting the balance of power in Congress. They hope that a wave of women pouring into public office will elevate issues that draw support from women and men in both parties. Women want to reshape how women think about their roles in American politics, where issues of concern become law.
Women are also having an economic impact globally. Men have always enjoyed a financial advantage over women. Still, women have made great strides across the globe as they take their rightful places in the halls of power.
S&P Global data and analysis show that women are “increasingly a market force with the power to shape economic trends worldwide.”
Being marginalized forces a need to fight for what you both need and deserve. The challenge is to move those not directly affected. How do you bring the importance of observed and documented injustices to those to whom these injustices do not apply? How do we enlighten people whose privileged status removes them from involvement or concern?
One of the ways you do this is by telling your story. And that’s what women are beginning to do. And these are not all “Me too” stories. They are life stories, and it is tough to argue with someone who is saying to you, “This is my experience.”
Fighting for women’s rights is about changing attitudes about women’s roles, place in society, and worth. How do we begin to do this? First, we have to clarify to everyone that the goals are not to replace men, undermine traditional male roles, or diminish men and their contributions.
Secondly, we support courageous women and men jumping into the ring to fight the equality fight of our time. We help with our time, our activism, and with our money. We educate, inform, and take a stand, doing whatever we can, big or small. To do nothing is no longer an option.
If you want to solve some of the World’s biggest problems, invest in Women and Girls!
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This post was previously published on Medium.
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