You Don't Look Like an Ally

October recognizes and celebrates Global Diversity Awareness, which focuses on the multitude of differences in our cultures and workplaces.

Organizations worldwide put forth the effort to promote diversity awareness and acceptance through many projects and media campaigns. One of the core missions of raising awareness for diversity in October is educating and empowering people who would otherwise be marginalized and, worst, ignored.

One of the most important aspects of bringing attention to diversity is, creating the space for allies to step up and form allyships and relationships that promote equity and inclusion.

Allies have a role in the conversations and actions that support creating access to all resources that might not be readily available to everyone in a particular part of the world.

Allyships are essential in the workplace when minorities and marginalized employees are treated inappropriately. In some severe cases, employees might be discriminated against or treated in ways that are not only against a company’s policy; they might also be illegal.

More and more companies are developing a team of leaders and employees dedicated to raising awareness for diversity in their leadership styles and culture. These teams are responsible for leading the way to create a more equitable and inclusive culture for all to thrive in during their tenure.

The model Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion teams are made with people with more differences than similarities.

People can be different beyond their gender, race, or age. Many of the layers of diversity may not be seen visible.

People are often confronted with their own biases when they meet someone they think does not belong in the diversity space.

For as far back as I can remember and up until the present time when I meet people in the DEI space, I am often met with comments that include you don’t look like you belong here with us.

Presenting as a white cisgender male has been a challenge to someone like me who is massively passionate about being involved in the DEI space. I am accepted into the conversations only when I can talk about my experiences as a gay man driven to be an ally.

As a result of coming out as a gay man in the spring of 1982 during my probationary period with my first corporate job, the journey that presented itself to me has allowed me to advocate for myself and the people around me.

In my first leadership role in 1983, I quickly learned that I had access to meetings where decisions were made for people who otherwise were not in the rooms. Speaking up for others and ensuring their best interests were represented became a significant part of my leadership style throughout my 35-year career.

When I reflect on my drive to work in the DEI space, I find these three Ds were instrumental in supporting me.

Determination: I kept my sights on my purpose of serving and supporting others and remained keenly aware when the opportunity to make a difference as a leader came up. I overcame the resistance from others who did not see me as a valuable member of the DEI space by not giving up.

Differences: I made sure when I met people working in the DEI space that they knew that I was more than how I showed up as a white male, I confidently shared with them that my differences gave me the experiences to be there just the same as anyone else.

Discussions: I have rarely shied away from having a difficult conversation and talking about my sexual orientation and other things that make me uniquely different. I firmly believe that I can find something in common with another person if we start a conversation; it usually happens in under five minutes.

I am grateful for the people I have worked with who were willing to meet me and start a conversation about how we might collaborate to move forward with the work needed in the DEI space.

I have developed a leadership style that focuses on supporting others, and the best ways I know how to do that are as an ally.

In January of 2022, I will hit my 40th anniversary of starting my career.

I have started the draft of a book that will highlight my many experiences as an ally with some of the most talented people who achieved so much in their careers. I want to share how being an unlikely ally might have a tremendous impact on other people and, in doing so, encourage more unlikely allies to step up.

What can you do to show up as an ally during Global Diversity Awareness Month?

With much gratitude.