Nate Bagley seeks advice on how to find the person who will fight for you—not with you.
What does it take to have an amazing relationship? What does it take to not only avoid a disaster, but to rise above the mediocrity and complacency that has infected most modern-day relationships? Here are two tips from Jenna McCarthy that will help you elevate your game.
Be Yourself
“Be healthy and happy. You have to be the best you can be.
Be yourself.
My parents had a horrible marriage. They would get in a fight, and my mom would say, ‘I will forgive you if you send me flowers once a week.’
So my dad would call the florist, give them his credit card number and say ‘Every Wednesday, deliver this, or I’ll be in the dog house.’
And then she would get her flowers and say, ‘Look at your father! He gave me flowers!’
No! There’s no meaning behind that. There’s no love behind that. It’s so disingenuous.
You want to be loved for who you are. You really have to like yourself. If you don’t like who you are, nobody else ever will.”
You get what you settle for.
You never ever ever ever get more than you settle for. Not ever. Not in any situation in life. Not in a job. Not in a hobby. Not in a relationship.
Are you settling for a relationship full of criticism, nagging, and impatience?
Are you settling for a relationship full of laziness, lack of connection, and disengagement?
Are you settling for a relationship of selfishness, constant arguing, and backstabbing?
Are you settling by playing the victim card? Are you expecting someone else to make you happy, or feel loved? Are you waiting for someone else to make the effort to make your relationship great?
You get what you settle for.
Instead, settle into a relationship full of forgiveness, encouragement, compliments, and growth.
Settle down with someone who will be an active participant in creating something meaningful every day with you.
Settle down with a partner, someone who you can trust will choose to be happy, healthy, and encouraging.
Choose to settle with someone who will fight for you, not with you.
Check out Jenna’s website for her book trailers, her hilarious blog, and for more information on her books. Find her on the Twitters and the Facebooks too!
Originally appeared at The Loveumentary
Hi,
I think you missed the ” how to find the person ” part from the header of the article.
Getting advice on how to settle in a relationship when the women you meet won’t even give you a second look, is a bit abstract anyway.
FlyingKal, that’s such a sad comment! Why would you think a woman would not give you a second look?
Yes please. I’ve been down the first path. No more. I want a soul mate, someone I can bare my heart to. I want someone that I want to see grow every day and still be the individual they are. I want someone who trusts me absolutely that every decision I make will have their well being taken into consideration. I want to be able to breakdown in front of this person when I need to, admit that I am scared and small sometimes. Most of all I want every point above on their side of the relationship as well.… Read more »
I am reminded of a relationship I ended within just 4 weeks. He verbalized similar sentiments. The problem was that he had such a strict definition of what a relationship should look like, be like, feel like… there was no room for me. At any time I did not respond to him they way he expected, needed, whatever… he started saying there was something wrong with me. Accusations that , “I wasn’t being real” that I had a problem” and three weeks in, he decided that I should come with him to one of his counseling sessions, and pay for… Read more »