The Fall Guy (2024), directed by David Leitch (John Wick, Atomic Blonde), was the most fun movie of 2024. Well, at least for me. No, it’s not the greatest movie, still I laughed a whole lot. The Fall Guy also touched my heart, made me look inside myself.
Handsome funny Ryan Gosling played Hollywood stuntman Colt Seavers, who was madly in love with second unit director Jody Moreno, played by beautiful smart Emily Blunt. When a movie stunt went tragically wrong, Colt fell breaking his back. Jody, who loved Colt, wanted to take care of him, but he disappeared from her life. He disappeared on himself, too.
A couple years later, Colt was summoned to be the stuntman in Jody’s directorial debut, the space alien action-romance Metal Storm. In her Metal Storm narrative, Alien Princess Illyana and Space Cowboy don’t fall in love and live happily ever after. Jody said, “That happy ever after stuff, unsubscribe me.” She gave up on her own her happy ending with Colt.
In the ridiculous murder conspiracy, Colt escaped from bad guys, who wanted to kill him. He called Jody on her mobile phone, believing that might be the last time they ever speak.
Colt admitted that he made a grave mistake dropping out of Jody’s life. As a Hollywood stuntman, he got hurt many times. He said, “None of that hurts more than not being with you… For what it’s worth, I’m still in love with you. And I don’t think you should ever give up on that happy ending. I gotta go.”
Yeah, Jody and Colt have their happy ending in The Fall Guy. After all, this was romantic comedy. Intrinsically by design, romantic comedies end happy. That’s what I love about them.
When I was 8 years old, I never thought that I would have the happy ending. I was the short fat ugly geek, who wasn’t good at any sports. In high school, I was 5’ 3”, still fat, and not handsome. No pretty girl would ever want to date me, much less look at me. I was not good enough for them. I was just not good enough. Period. I was also very sad.
Growing up, I was not the son that Dad wanted. I was his greatest disappointment in life. I was not good enough for Dad. I was not good enough for anyone, including me. I spent much of my adult life proving that I was good enough, that I was good enough to be loved. I took the path less travelled. On my path, I trained in Aikido and participated in therapy.
I trained in Aikido with the late Mizukami Sensei for 25 years until he passed away. Sensei was a father to me, taught me to be a good man, and make difference for others. Sensei said, “Just train.” For the first time in my life, I didn’t have to get somewhere or be someone else. I could just be me. Sensei created the space for me to become as great as I could be. That was my happy ending.
Mizukami Sensei taught both Ishibashi Sensei and me. Ishibashi Sensei now teaches me. He’s my big brother. Ishibashi Sensei said, “The purpose of Aikido is to release your fear.” He said, “The safest place to be is under the attack, in the danger.” I wait it out. I enter the attack and die with honor. Under the attack, I hold my position. I let go my fear inside that I’m not good enough. Although my fear inside never completely disappears, every time I enter what I fear, I let go more of my fear inside me. I free me. Everything quiet inside me. My happy ending, too.
I work with my therapist Lance Miller to heal my childhood trauma and depression. I forgive my Dad for not knowing how to be a father, for being afraid inside too, and for being imperfectly human. I forgive myself for not being strong enough as a little boy to stand up to Dad and protect Mom. I forgive myself for being imperfectly human, too. I love myself for who I am and forgive myself for who I’m not. That’s my happily ever after on the path to end suffering.
On the journey to fall madly and deeply in love with a woman, who will love me back the same, I’m not what women want. I’m 5’ 3”. I’m not handsome. I’m not exactly rich. Women have dismissed or used me, because of who I am, how I look. I’ve had some dates on Match dot com. I’m forever young and dumb as I send out messages to women I would like to meet. I ask about their favorite movies. Do they like sushi? I don’t have many replies. Still, I keep trying.
I may not have my happy ending finding the great love of my life. Who knows? Lightning could strike. Still, I have other possible happy endings. Like being Sensei. Like participating in therapy. Like writing for The Good Men Project. I do the math. I do the work. I have faith, too. I have nothing to do with what goes on inside someone else. I have a say in what goes on inside me. I work on myself, not on others. That’s all I can do.
I make myself happy. No one else can. I make my happy endings in life. I create my happiness. There are always possibilities. There are many happy endings, too. I’m grateful for the ones I have. I have a meaningful life, a life I love.
I don’t think that you should ever give up on your happy ending. You always have a say in what goes on inside you. You make your own happy endings. You make your own happiness. You’re the only one who can. That just takes work. Just train.
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