I’ve recently been afraid to be so or too in love with anything because when anything becomes the centre of your life it takes away from who God is in your life. Oh yeah, in case I didn’t mention I’m Christian.
Since watching the Netflix film Someone Great, knowledge or rather wisdom about singleness has been finding me and I’ve been tagging at it as well in a way. Over the course of the year i’ve learnt that when you get into a relationship the other person is not there to complete you which in secular language would be termed ‘my other half’. When you can’t feel genuinely happy or that your life has a purpose just because someone isn’t in your life anymore THAT IS NOT HEALTHY and I know all this goes against a lot if not everything that we’ve come to know love as but hear me out.
No one is perfect but when you’re accepting of your flaws and shortcomings and walk into a relationship with such self-assurance there’s no room to seek validation from another person even though in a strong relationship you unveil all your shortcomings and flaws to your partner. Close to the end of the movie, Jenny (Gina Rodriguez) confronted her fear of being detached from her college sweetheart which was due to her immerse dependency on Nate (Lakeith Stanfield) being her fulfilment of love.
I also cannot neglect the clear impact a person has on our lives when they’ve played such an intimate role and I truly believe genuine love can be so powerful as to feel like the very breathe in our lungs but that love is still not our hearts that pump blood or our brains that tell our limbs what to do. What I’m saying is love is definitely a significant part of our lives but it’s not the whole thing especially if it’s not a God centred love. To cut back on what could be a book, when you realise that someone or something whether good or bad makes you incomplete without it you have to distance yourself and realign yourself.
When you can detach from someone and fall in love again when you reunite just like when you first manifested that love for said person repeatedly. That’s a healthy love.
P.S.: I’m no love guru, I’m learning this love thing too and just sharing my thoughts :).
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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