3 Steps to Honoring Yourself and What You Need This Holiday

The holidays are a hectic time when getting into overwhelm is almost a given. Finding time to go to the gym, and keep up with self-care is a challenge. Christmas represents a time of giving but if you are not giving to yourself, the holidays become more about pleasing others than yourself.

1. Prioritize and Honor Choices

Christmas is the time to give but not at your own expense. Prioritize what works best for you. Not every event is mandatory. Choose which activities you can skip or leave early to avoid overwhelm. Opting out when it feels like too much is great self-care!

I’m not suggesting that you ditch out of the family Christmas party because you don’t feel like going. Attitude sets the tone for enjoyment so try focusing on what you enjoy instead of assuming the negative.

When you allow yourself to do less, you’ll get more time to enjoy the holidays. You feel more at choice for what you are participating in instead of feeling obligated.

If you are the super responsible type, this is challenging. Let go of the guilt that you should do what you’ve always done. If nothing changes, nothing changes right?

2. Set Boundaries Instead of People Pleasing

When the holidays become all about giving, you may end up feeling taken advantage of and frustrated. Honoring your wants makes the holidays more enjoyable!

Think about what you want this holiday season. Maybe it’s time to start a new tradition that reflects your values instead of doing what you’ve always done.

Here are some areas to think about to get you started.

What would make your holiday more enjoyable?
Is there anything you REALLY don’t want to do?
Are there any obligations you want to decline?
Don’t let negative self-talk or guilt keep things status quo.
Consider taking separate cars if you want more flexibility.

3. Tools To Heal Old Hurts Before The Holidays

Old hurts tend to surface around the holidays. Being with family can be stressful when these issues are left unresolved. Heading into the holidays with the right tools can make the holidays more bearable.

Don’t let the past control the present. Focusing on what happened last year impacts the ability to enjoy the present. You miss out on the good stuff because you’re fixated on what hurts instead of what works.

Find ways to deal more effectively with old hurts and resentments. If a resentment causes you to avoid spending time with them, consider handling it beforehand.

Here are some tips to help you handle it.

Try journal writing to vent and get clarity.
If you need to clear things up, do it before the event.
Share your feelings and concerns, not judgments.
Watch negative expectations, Don’t predict the day before it happens.
Stay in the moment and find neutral things to talk about.
Always remember to take care of yourself.

Creating an enjoyable holiday means taking care of yourself despite the craziness of the season. If old hurts are getting in the way, have the courage to address them or let them go. Taking care of you is sometimes the best gift you can give.
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