Dreams, what are they? Are they something that only exists in our head? Or something that can be touched, felt, and experienced? Well, that’s up to you to decide.
As kids, our dreams were to grow up, be successful, and do the things our parents wouldn’t let us do. Then, as we get to see more and more of the world, we start to want things. We start chasing the things that we think might bring us joy and happiness.
For a lucky few, they get to stumble upon their true passion. Something that feels like escaping time while they’re doing it. Like teleporting to another dimension and only coming out a few hours later.
But the unfortunate fact for many of us is that before we can even pursue this dream, it has already gotten hammered down to the ground and have no chance at all to take flight.
Friends, family, the Internet, strangers, the universe. They’ve all taken shots at our dreams, maybe they think that they’re saving us from the disappointment that’s yet to come, maybe they just don’t want us to succeed, who knows?
But they did it, and they were successful at it. They broke that childhood dreams of ours that was meant to take us to places we’ve never been before and now we’re stuck in an office wondering what the fuck happen to that fire in our heart.
It is not uncommon to hear dreams that never got the chance to be experienced. Sometimes, these things are out of our control due to the environment we’re in. But good news, there are a few things that we can do to protect our dreams, no matter how big or small they are.
…
#1. Don’t share them with shitty people.
Only share them with people whom you really know are not going to give you shit about it.
The shitty people
Not everybody wants to see you succeed. In fact, more than the other, the people around you secretly want you to fail because they themselves do not have the guts to embark on their personal journey. Then they go ahead and tell you that your dream is way too far away and that you’ll never achieve it.
Here is a list of people that have the potential to shit on your dreams:
- Friends
- Family
- Strangers on the Internet
- Strangers on the streets
Well, in other words, just about anybody in the world except your pets.
I was told that being a professional guitarist is comparable to being a beggar because it is not a real job. Instead, I should “learn” to love something like engineering, business, or accounting. I was told to get a steady job, have a stable income, and raise a family. Then, work some more, get a few reputable titles, drive a nice car, buy a big house.
“You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can’t do something themselves they tell you, you can’t do it. If you want something, go get it, period.” — Will Smith
The good people
Despite that, I strongly believe that there are supportive and nice people who really want to see you succeed.
Tim Denning even mentioned that you can attract luck by simply telling people what you are working on. It is a risk that you’ll have to take, but it’s one that will pay off well if they are the right people.
There are people who are striving for that same goal that understands your struggles.
Just a heads up, this journey is going to be long and tough, so if you can get a boost from someone in your network, it would be a bonus.
#2. Be realistic. Don’t rush it.
Take it slow and steady. Don’t try to do everything at once.
Instead, make a plan about how you’re going to get there. That’s because when you rush it, you’ll have a good chance of burning out. And then you’ll think to yourself: “Why am I even doing this?” or “Is it even worth it?”
You’ll start to doubt your every move and question if your ultimate goal is even possible. And this is not the best position to be in, considering your dream is at stake here.
The truth is, just about any goal anybody sets is entirely possible and achievable. However, you need to allow yourself the time to get there. Just like Rome wasn’t built in one day, you cannot expect to achieve your most ambitious goals in a matter of weeks.
If you’re dead serious about achieving your desired goals, do this instead:
- Establish your end goal/destination.
- Create a map of checkpoints.
- Come up with a task list based on those checkpoints.
- Create a timeline and a deadline for each task. (Try your best not to underestimate or overestimate your ability)
- Focus on one task at a time. JUST ONE.
I’ll always recommend working from the absolute top to bottom. Which means starting with the ultimate goal, and then breaking it down into smaller tasks before setting out on the journey. The idea is to not get burnt out and give up before your hard work comes into fruition.
But know this too: The world is constantly evolving. Nothing stays the same. So be prepared to adapt when needed. Then, eyes back on the target.
Photo by S’well on Unsplash
#3. Pay yourself.
Recently, I came across a pet’s shelter that takes in severely injured and paralyzed puppies. Their aim is to be a completely self-funded organization because they do it out of their own goodwill. However, the costs of food, medical charges, and even the human resource can really add up over time. If this organization aren’t able to generate enough income to support their good intentions, eventually, the whole establishment will come crashing down.
An unfortunate fact of the world we live in is that even though your intentions are 100% pure, you still need money to do it. I know you want to reinvest that money as soon as possible and you can’t wait to grow that dream even bigger.
But, don’t forget to pay yourself too! You need to take care of yourself. The first few years are going to be really tough. You will be spending a lot of time building the foundation and the groundwork of your dream. On top of that, you’ll only be receiving lower than minimum pay during this period.
You have to find a way to get through this period without losing interest. Find a way to keep the momentum going even when the shit hits the fan. Here are some of the best ways you can spend the money you’ve made in the first few years:
- Reinvest it back into the craft. Learn from those who came before you. There is just so much out there to discover.
- Invest in a healthier lifestyle. Ensure that you are taking good care of your body and your mind. It will benefit you in the long-term.
- Celebrate small wins. Not for anybody, but for yourself. Each step forward is a step closer to your destination. It helps keep you thinking it will be worth it in the end.
And then eventually, as this income outgrows the income you’re getting from your day job, you are free to make the switch. You get to buy some of that time back from that daily grind to build your dream and grow this income even more.
The truth is, money is a very real thing in our society. Without it, we are shackled and are unable to do what we really want. Don’t overlook it. At the same time, pay yourself while at it. Your dreams have to reward your hard work in some ways.
Final thoughts:
You’ll constantly question the meaning of life while not being able to live if because you’re stuck at your current job.
You’ll start to question why you’re working so hard to no end.
You’ll start to wonder if you will have the time to spend the money you made.
And the answer is a big-ass NO.
So instead, why not take a chance at going for your dreams? What do you have to lose anyway?
A little bit of time? A little bit of disappointment when things don’t work out?
Look at what’s on the other side of this.
You get to live your dream!
You get to do whatever you want to do whenever you want to do them!
You get to do the thing you absolutely love to do every single day!
Having big houses and nice cars do sound nice but what’s better is having those things while being able to pursue your passion. The joy of doing something you love but with a lower salary greatly outweighs the misery of doing something you’re not meant to with a higher income.
The world is as cruel as it is kind. There will be people who want to see you fail just to feel better themselves, but there are also people who genuinely want to see you succeed. It is up to you to protect that little dream of yours and let it grow from one silly weed to a big-ass forest.
If you don’t chase after your dreams, not only you’re robbing yourself of a chance at being the best version of yourself, you’re also robbing the world of a chance at experiencing what you can possibly offer.
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project and want a deeper connection with our community, please join us as a Premium Member today.
Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS. Need more info?
A complete list of benefits is here.
—
Photo credit: Joshua Rondeau on Unsplash