Are you missing your potential possibilities because you have become comfortable with where you are? Do you continue to complain and grumble about your situation while doing nothing about it?
A comfortable pain
What is a comfortable pain? It is a mental state in which you lose the desire to make changes in your life because you have become comfortable with where you are in spite of the pain of staying there.
I read a story a couple years ago that really hit home. A man was visiting a friend, and as he was approaching the porch, he could hear his friend’s dog moaning and groaning. When his friend answered the door he asked him what was wrong with the dog. His friend said, “He is lying on a nail.” This baffled the man because he wondered why the dog would continue to lie on the nail when it was obviously causing him pain. He asked his friend, “Why doesn’t the dog just get up?” His friend said, “I guess it doesn’t hurt badly enough.”
When I read that story, the first thing I said was, “That dog was crazy.” I thought if he were in that much pain, why wouldn’t he just get up? Before I could finish bashing the insanity of the dog, I thought about myself. I was a lot like that old dog. I go through several of my daily activities in very much the same pain. I was allowing the comfort of familiarity to hold me hostage.
I was doing a lot of moaning and groaning about my situation, but I was continuing to lie on my nail in pain instead of doing something about it. I was going to church and hearing powerful sermons about individuals who moved in their purpose. I listened to tapes, read books and watched programs about others’ triumphs and victories, but I continued to remain on my nail.
One day, I was thinking about my future and where I was in life. I thought about the missed opportunities because of my decision to live in a comfortable pain. The pain of not doing what I was purposed to do was aggravating and frustrating. I finally made a decision that I was going to move in a different direction. I knew that if I continued to live in this misery I would miss my opportunity.
I decided I was going to move forward even if I did not know how things would turn out. I knew life had to be better than the pain of frustration and discouragement I was dealing with. I made the decision to go after my vision. I developed a vision plan, implemented a strategy and went to work.
If you are at a point in life that you are tired of moaning and groaning about your comfortable pain, now is the time to take hold of your life. You cannot spend another day tolerating a pain that you do not have to put up with. If you remain fearful of leaving your comfortable pain, your situations will remain the same ten days, ten months or ten years from now.
You have the power to choose to go in a different direction. You have the power to move from your pain and into your promise. If you are in a negative situation that is causing you problems and pain, maybe it is time take a fresh look at yourself; discover who you are, define where you want to be, develop a clear plan of action and move forward.
Here are six keys to help you break through a comfortable pain.
- Face a fear now – Is there a fear in your life that’s been causing you to miss living your vision? Every time you start to make your move to live out your vision, fear shows up to stall your efforts. We all deal with some type of fear in one way or another. But, what separates the person that breaks free of his fear from the person that stays lock in fear is his ability to face the fear and move forward.
Think of that one fear that is holding you back from living at your maximum potential and set a goal to face the fear head on. Facing your fears won’t be easy, but you can overcome them if you commit to taking consistent action.
- Do what scares you. To break through a comfortable pain sometimes you have to do what scares you. Eleanor Roosevelt said it best, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” Many people think that there are magic words or pills that can be said or given to just change their comfortable pain. This just does not happen. In order to gain victory over a comfortable pain, you must change how you behave.
Don’t wait for everything to be perfect. Don’t wait to make changes tomorrow. You must act now because if you do not, you allow the comfortable pain to win. I know it is scary to do things different, but do it anyway. I know there is the possibility of failure, but take action in spite of the doubts. It is time to be courageous and do something every day that helps you break free from your comfortable pain.
- Go after a specific goal. You must have clear and specific goals that give your life direction. Without clear goals, you can end up going around and around in circles living an unproductive and unsatisfied life. For example, many people desire to be debt free. The first step I suggest is to set a S.M.A.R.T. goal, a goal that is specific, measurable, actionable, reinforcing and trackable.
Just make sure the goal reinforces your values and the direction where you want to go. Then create a plan with action steps that you can track your progress in case you need to make adjustments or changes. Now take one small action everyday towards your goal or at least once a week. Before long, you will have made real progress and feel good about yourself in the process. Here is an example: I will be debt free by September 1, 2020.
- Change your mindset. Many of us hold ourselves hostage from living our best life because of a negative mindset. We have that discouraging voice in our heads or people we know that we listen to that tell us that we can’t do something, that something is impossible, or that we do not have the right skills, education or experience to achieve a goal. Negative thinking will leave you mentally incapacitated to the point that you can’t live past yesterday’s pains, today’s circumstances or tomorrow’s challenges.
We all desire to accomplish something, but to get it, we must believe in our ability to accomplish the steps it takes to get it. We must change our thinking from “I can’t” to “I can do it”, from “I will never make it” to “I can make it”. Your mindset can limit or expand your world. It can influence what you attempt or avoid. Your mindset determines your destiny. Success and failure begins with what the mind believes is possible. Change your thinking and your life will follow.
- Hold yourself accountable. Accountability is another key to breaking through a comfortable pain. You want to tell your trusted family and friends about what you desire to do. This is an important step because the people in your life you trust and value will keep you on track. You want them to give you that ‘push’ as you are pushing your boundaries. They will make it hard for you to quit because you know you will look foolish if you did.
Surrounding yourself with people who will hold you accountable is one of the best ways to help you face and overcome a comfortable pain in your life. Do not try to do it alone. Do not run your race in isolation. You need individuals in your corner that will encourage and speak truth to your life.
Do not build your inner circle with individuals who only tell you what you want to hear. You do not need a ‘YES’ team. You need individuals who will let you know when you are off-course and who are willing to help you get back on track. Build your team with individuals who believe that you can break through the comfortable pain, who want to see you succeed and who speak truth to you even when it hurts.
- Take action. If you spend more time talking about what you are going to do to overcome a comfortable pain rather than doing something about it, shut your mouth. Don’t exhaust more energy talking about your dreams and desires. Don’t say another word to anyone about what you can do or desire to do. Better yet, let your actions speak louder than your words.
Please know that when you take action to overcome a comfortable pain, opposition and obstacles will come. They will show up when you least expect them. They will be relentless, unforgiving and ruthless. They want to see you live an unproductive, boring and fruitless life because of your comfortable pain.
They will come at you daily with discouraging words. They will flood your mind with negative thoughts to hinder your progress. If, however, you possess a focused plan, a progressive mindset and determined action, you can triumph over a comfortable pain.
If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired of living with a comfortable pain, then take the necessary actions today to go in a different direction. You don’t have to wait for something magical to happen or a special formula to set you free. You don’t have to wait for the right person to give you permission to move forward. You can start today by simply implementing these six keys and finally break through a comfortable pain that’s been hindering your life.
Question: What step(s) can you implement today to break through a comfortable pain in your life? Leave your comment below.
“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.” Brian Tracy