
You think everything is fine because the person forgives you… until you repeat it. Soon, it becomes a toxic relationship where you are constantly hurting each other.
It’s so easy to lash out in the heat of the moment. You think that it’s okay because the person will understand that you were upset. Well, if the person were empathic, they would understand. If the person is not as forgiving, you’ll probably face a full-on “fight”.
And before you know it, your 10-year friendship is gone.
Holding Your Tongue Is Not A Weakness
It’s a strength. Your ability to assess the situation and think your thoughts through before speaking is something many people lack. This ability will make you a better decision-maker.
Who wants a boss who panics and shouts at everyone because the sales aren’t growing? Or a friend who constantly belittles you every time you don’t agree with them? Or a partner who forgets about all the good you’ve done together and disgraces you just because you couldn’t help them one time?
Nobody. You would rather work and be with someone who sees a bad situation and calmly thinks of a solution.
I don’t see a rude person as someone in control or someone with power. To me, it shows their insecurities. Someone who isn’t able to hold their tongue is someone who isn’t in control of their actions.
So, if you ever want to be a respected person in power, learn to control how you react. Be respectful and kind. It will be reciprocated.
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Previously published on Medium.com.
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So how do you do it? Your description of the problem is excellent, if simplified, but seems to imply a man could if he wanted to somehow over – ride his own instincts. If you have discovered a way then please, I’d love to know, because my own uncontrolled outbursts, fueled by a desire to be right, are ruining both my life and that of anyone who is still willing to give me the time of day.