This post sponsored by SHFT.
The answer is simple. We need more men to be men. Hold on. Let me explain, dude. First, let’s define man. Put the life coaching thing aside. We’ll come back to that.
Men get their definitions by other men, specifically dad. We live in a fatherless nation. This means dad is either absent physically or emotionally. So that space is filled with boys who also don’t have dads. Or most of them don’t. So we have a lot of boys raised by boys and grow up confused about their definition of what a man looks like. Throw in advertising which defines man by muscle, fast cars, cool hair, and corner offices.
Then we have the internet and apps. Boys learning about sex and intimacy through pornography and the language of dating through apps like Tinder. Intimacy becomes skin deep and courting someone is never learned. Instead, he swipes, texts, ghosts, and never learns to communicate. This rolls into his relationships. And of course, they fail so he never learns how to be in something healthy, as well as the work it takes. From these experiences, he forms beliefs about himself. Not good enough. Not loveable.
And from these beliefs, reactions, destructive reactions that hurt himself as well as others. This leads to isolation, depression, more false beliefs which all fuel more reactions. The greatest difference between a man and a boy is boys react and men respond.
Now let’s get back to coaching and why more men need to do it. Even if they never pursue it as a career.
As a life coach, you will learn how to respond instead of react. It’s primer, the basics of coaching. You can’t coach anyone if you’re reacting because you’ll be making it about you instead of your client. This is just the tip of the iceberg. You’ll learn tons of tools, most importantly how to listen and create a safe space. These aren’t things we learn in a classroom unless you’re on a journey to becoming a therapist. But being a therapist can take years.
Life coaching is faster and men are more drawn to coaching someone than being their therapist. Also it’s something you can do on the side. You don’t have to commit to it as a career choice. Once you learn these tools, you can’t unlearn them. This means your tools will bleed into other areas of your life. Like your relationships. With your friends. At work. Being a better father. A stronger leader. A more powerful catalyst.
A good life coaching course forces you to look at yourself. It’s not just about learning how to help others. It’s about an inner journey that gives you a mirror and flashlight for your own life. It’s the ultimate self help book / seminar / retreat, or whatever you’re doing to change your life that isn’t working.
This is why men need to be life coaches.
So they can be better men.
And we all know the world needs better men.
Photo courtesy of author