What is the opposite of a hero? Is it a villain? Or something else?
Villains can be described as “heroes gone bad.” They have similar attributes; both heroes and villains are dynamic forces that take action in the world. A key difference is that villains’ actions are not grounded in respect for others. They use their capabilities to pursue ends that impose upon or harm others in some way, and in the process serve only themselves and their own agendas. Villains like Thanos from the Marvel universe, for example, force their ideologies on others. By imposing his own worldview on people, Thanos limits their personal agency (not to mention their very existence, but that’s another story).
A hero, by contrast, is fundamentally motivated by the belief that other people matter, and that they should be free to determine their own destinies. Heroes offer help and guidance without demanding obedience to a worldview. Their assistance is not conditional or forced on another (with the possible exception of emergency situations where quick physical intervention is required, such as when a first responder rescues someone who can’t give consent because they’re unconscious).
So, being a villain is bad and acting heroically is good, right? But if we agree on this point, why do we have as much conflict as we have cooperation in the world? Is there another aspect of our behavior that thwarts our heroic instincts?
***
Beware the Bystander Effect
There is an instinct within most of us to undertake the altruistic actions we consider stereotypically heroic. This instinctual imperative for the preservation of other human lives is rooted in our evolutionary origins. This is understandable, given the fact our survival as a species depends on cooperation. With the advent of more organized and complex civilizations, we took this instinct a step further by incorporating it into our myths, religions, and philosophies.
Our ability to cooperate is self-evident in the very fact of our continued existence and the complexity of today’s interconnected world. The more cynical among us might argue that our continued existence is a fluke or a stroke of sheer luck. But there’s growing evidence to contradict such cynicism toward our intrinsic nature.
As ingrained as our cooperative instincts may be, they can be thwarted by conflicting internal motivations. Often, we don’t act to help others because of fear of retaliation, or mere inconvenience. Some of us might be inclined or socialized to criticize or judge others, a passive behavior that provides us with the illusion of action.
As for external motivations for not helping, Dr. Phil Zimbardo studies a phenomenon called the “bystander effect.” He points to human group behaviors like “pluralistic ignorance.” This occurs when “a group’s majority privately believes one thing but mistakenly assumes that others believe the opposite.” Dr. Zimbardo gives the example of no one stopping to help another driver on the side of the road. Since no one else is stopping to help, we assume no help is required. There is also the phenomenon of diffusion of responsibility. The more people in the vicinity of someone in need of help, the less responsibility the average person will feel to help. We can feel the peer pressure to conform, to stay quiet and passive.
Whatever the motivation, it all boils down to this: a bystander is truly the opposite of a hero. They are stagnant, passive, and take no action for the sake of others. They are wasted potential energy.
***
Take Heroic Action in the World
Though the bystander effect can be powerful, there are ways to overcome it. As Dr. Zimbardo suggests, awareness of the bystander effect allows us to consciously overcome it. We can choose to take action in some way, even if it’s just dialing 911 or speaking out against an injustice. By taking action, we also become the example for others to follow suit, and potentially set in motion a cascade of action from others. Zimbardo also suggests looking bystanders in the eye and asking them directly for help in some specific way (such as asking them to call 911).
Don’t sit on the sidelines of life. Put some skin in the game. Giving some of your time, attention, energy, and help to others is not just about personal sacrifice. There’s ever-increasing evidence that other-care is self-care. Altruism, and a bit of altruistic risk, in service to others (regardless of the amount and type of risk we undertake) can help instill you with a sense of meaning and purpose.
***
The Good Men Project gives people the insights, tools, and skills to survive, prosper and thrive in today’s changing world. A world that is changing faster than most people can keep up with that change. A world where jobs are changing, gender roles are changing, and stereotypes are being upended. A world that is growing more diverse and inclusive. A world where working towards equality will become a core competence. We’ve built a community of millions of people from around the globe who believe in this path forward. Thanks for joining The Good Men Project.
Support us on Patreon and we will support you and your writing! Tools to improve your writing and platform-building skills, a community to get you connected, and access to our editors and publisher. Your support will help us build a better, more inclusive world for all.
***
Photo credit: Shutterstock