2. Don’t do drugs … or a dead man’s ashes.
3. It is really easy being beautiful.
4. How to get a longer lunch.
5. Amy Chua: “Take your children to Chuck E. Cheese’s and let them play any game they choose, then make them watch as you burn their tickets.”
6. Um, good for you, buddy.
7. Quick, kids. Look, before he melts.
8. I’m writing this from the bathroom at Starbucks.
9. Ribeye and Lobster. It’s what’s for State Dinner.
10. So, technically, you owe me 23 years worth of presents, right Mom?