In order to provide a much-needed dose of warm fuzzies to the blog (especially much-needed, given the past couple of days) and combat Gender Warrior On The Internet Does Nothing In Real Life Syndrome, I’ve decided we ought to have a probably-weekly thread about what people have done for gender egalitarianism or social justice this week.
This can be anything, no matter how big or small. “Came out to my parents” counts; so does “gave twenty bucks to RAINN,” “wrote a letter to my congressperson,” “smiled at some guy with his kids,” “marched in a Slutwalk/Pride parade,” or “asked my friend not to tell rape jokes.” Or something else I haven’t thought of!
Positive comments on other people’s comments are encouraged. However, anything that criticizes what another person did will be deleted. This is the warmfuzzies thread, remember?
Trigger warning for PTSD, violence, bullying. realised that it is entirely possible I have PTSD from bullying/abuse at school, and precisely why the series of events that stick out at me as traumatic do. I’m a trans man. At my co-educational state primary school I was bullied a lot- for talking “posh”, being stuck up, performing femininity wrong, being the weird kid who wandered round playing imaginary games in which he was Edmund in Narnia, telling tales, etc. I was a really quite violent kid, frequently towards “other” girls- who’s bullying was psychological and emotional (they would stop being friends… Read more »
It can be really hard for people to come to terms with their own trauma, especially men, who face emasculation if they admit to emotions other than anger– which can be particularly hard for trans men, who are gender-policed so much whenever they veer away from the norms. I’m really proud of you for coming to terms with that and wish you the best of luck with the rest of your healing.
I wouldn’t be so quick to knock internet warriors. Even if they personally do nothing in real life, they can still have an effect. I have challenged anti-fat bigotry in real life that I would probably not even have noticed if it hadn’t been for internet activists. I would do the same for other bigotries should I ever encounter it.
I’m not saying Internet Gender Warrior is a bad thing: I’m an Internet Gender Warrior myself. 🙂 Just that there’s a certain tendency to talk all the right theory to the inner circle of activists and not have it actually impact your life.
On Sunday, the drumming band which I co-founded and coach, performed on-stage and also busked at a boat festival. Later that day I spent several hours moving our drums and other stuff to a new temporary home, as their usual home is being renovated. Where’s the social justice in all this? The band is open to anyone who wants to take part, regardless of playing ability. We have several members with learning difficulties, or who are otherwise disabled. They are fully included in practices and public performances. None of this would be possible if nobody did the mundane routine and… Read more »
That’s really awesome! As a former drama nerd myself, arts education can really make a difference in people’s lives.
That’s awesome! 🙂
A co-worker whom I like very much (yet I am hoping will offer me a job under his organization) was talking to me about a co-worker of mine. I said “You don’t know So-And-So? She’s the director of marketing for the entire company.” He said “Oh, yeah, that chick in [redacted.]” I said, without missing a beat, or sounding disapproving – said “Yes, So-And-So is that woman in [redacted.]” I was proud of myself for correcting someone more powerful (in the company) than I am on that minor point. If I’m still in the same job 5 years from now,… Read more »
YES! I hate it when people argue that “chick” is not condescending or sexualizing!
I object to this; it’s not always condescending. It’s informal. Using “that chick” to mean “the director of marketing for the entire company” is something like calling the CEO “that dude”. It’s condescending because it’s too informal; it’s not condescending as an inherent part of the word.
It is always sexual, though, I’ll give you that.
I think the sexual aspect of the word makes it more condescending to me than “dude” because it implies that I cannot be referred to even in inappropriately informal terms without reference to my status as a sexual object. I don’t think “dude” suffices as an analogy because it isn’t sexual. Also, given the association of the word “chick” with things like “chick flick” and “chick lit” (from Wikipedia re: chick flick: “These films are generally held in popular culture as having formulaic, paint-by-numbers plot lines and characters. This makes usage of the term “problematic” for implying “frivolity, artlessness, and… Read more »
This is pretty similar to macho “guy films,” right? (With “testosterone overload” and other borderline sexist terms.) They’re not exactly respected as “good cinema,” and are treated as trash for “overly hormonal boys” who just want to see “tits and explosions” (think Transformers).
Personally, I don’t use the term “chick” professionally or to women in general (I use “girls” as the flipside of “guys”), but in more sexual/romantic contexts. It usually does have more of a sexual undertone (as in, “hey, gimme my beer, I’m gonna go talk to that chick over there”).
(I am a woman) A older, drunk man hit me with his umbrella this weekend because he didn’t like my nose ring. After chasing him off verbally, I was cursing him to the audience of te 4 guys sitting with me, and one of them said “Do you mind if I call him a cunt?” I said yes, because it was totally possible to insult someone without using a name for my anatomy, and so he said “That was such a dick thing to do.” I just gave him the side eye and said “It’s totally possible to insult him… Read more »
You are probably one of the most awesome people I have ever met. 🙂
Thanks ^^ (hugs) if they are welcome, virtual cake if not!
I had a conversation with a ‘tough’ friend about our ‘toughness’ and how it makes us more likely to deny our health concerns. We both agreed we need to change that outlook.
I also had a nurturing/sad talk with my daughter as she is starting to realize that being a mom doesnt necessarily make you maternal or nurturing.
I’ve been spreading that 1-in-6 statistic among all my feminist friends, leading to a lot of thoughtful discussions and “That seems high, only… well, there’s Nate, oh, and Eliot, and Alec told me about that thing that time… shit, I guess that’s about right.” (Names changed to characters from Leverage to protect anonymity.)
Sorry, I must have missed it…what is the 1-in-6 statistic?
https://noseriouslywhatabouttehmenz.wordpress.com/2011/07/01/1-in-6/
Thanks!
Hosted a showing of Vanishing of the Bees, which doesn’t sound like an outright feminist thing to do, until you see the movie. Feminism and ecology are intricately entwined, and I find a lot of hope in this connection.
Interesting. How so?
There are a bunch of scholars, who, much in the vein of Vandana Shiva, create a link between feminist perspectives and caring for the earth. There have always been strong links between feminine symbolism and the nurturing of the environment, but the movement as a whole has taken interest in ecology and caring for the planet, from a broader feminist view. There’s also a movement called ecofeminism, which seems a little bit suspect to me, but nonetheless bring light to this connection. One of my friends also said: “monoculture and other devastating environmental practices privilege a particular way of doing… Read more »
And to retie to the focus of this blog, women’s labor is undervalued by agricultural production around the world–but so is men’s, especially in industrialized agriculture, where laborers are exposed to difficult conditions and often lack real access to medical care. The exploitative practices of the agricultural sector overlap with other dimensions of privilege; people are targeted for exploitation because they are in no position to complain. Men and women also suffer from monoculture practices (highlighted in Vanishing Bees) in that they increase the levels of chemical contaminants in food and water sources–and often, testing on how contaminants may effect… Read more »
A non-leading question: Do you think that line of thought, though, plays into the stereotype of women as “more naturing and better caretakers” and the Earth as some eco-“holy” object?
Great question! Yes, it can. And while people can say “oh, but it’s a positive stereotype, so it’s okay, right?”, I could even see this topic being abused in some way. The point of view probably arose from the attitude that women are more “caring and nurturing”, which is clearly a social construct. It oversimplifies and creates a false dichotomy of Man the Engineer, and Woman the Gardener. That being said, I am a Dude, and I think the attitude, taken out of context of feminism, is a positive one, on the whole. I do not know how to reconcile… Read more »
@vverweij: Well, it’s not necessarily a positive thing. It’s actually, depending on how you want to look at it, an unfair gender role for women, as well as an instance of female privilege (which has a necessary flipside component of being sexist towards men in a sense). I’m thinking this would make an excellent blog post though. 🙂
Being boxed in as the ‘nurturing and ecological-minded’ gender makes me want to dump toxic waste in a river.
Right now.
It makes me want to leave all the lights on in my house while eating a hamburger…
While fondling my mink stole beaded with blood diamonds, eating bald eagle liver pate and twirling my mustache waxed with oil made of whale blubber.
Not to jump down your throat, vverweij, but this smells really funny to me. From what you’ve described, this movement has good intentions. But they pretty much piggybacked on a stereotypical construct of “Women are naturally better nurturers and defenders of the planet”. I don’t like groups that use false notions about one sex as a means to their message. I say the same thing about MRAs that are always talking about how men are garbagemen, sewage cleaners, and military soldiers defending freedom with no mention of men who are artists, writers, singers, actors, etc. Though Doctormindbeam said it better… Read more »
Totally. See my reply to DMB about this. It’s dangerous to pigeonhole yourself by adding “feminism” to your movement, when the real thing you are trying to address should be a global issue. I understand how the movement started, though, and there is merit in understanding why it has support.
Well, technically it is Sunday Social Justice and ecology falls well under the thread’s purview. 🙂
Colony collapse disorder is terrifying… so many things are pollinated by bees that without them our food system would be almost entirely destroyed. Or there’d be EVEN MORE corn byproducts.
Yeah. There are solutions, though. France and Germany have made some serious progress through legislation to ban systemic pesticides, but we will have to rethink other parts of our system, too. The US cannot live on producing just corn, wheat, and rice.
I went into my local corner store the other day and the shopkeeper had a page with some racist and sexist jokes that he showed me. I just read them and handed it back. He realised I didn’t like them and said, “Pretty sad, eh?”
Last week, I agreed to speak at a sexual violence awareness event scheduled for 7/15 in DC.
Over the last 2 weeks, I (through my publication The Multiracial Activist) participated in two separate civil liberties coalition efforts:
FOIA reform (led by Open The Government): http://jameslandrith.com/content/view/3806/40/
E-Verify (led by ACLU): http://jameslandrith.com/content/view/3807/40/
Those are some really cool coalition programs! The ACLU is basically one of my favorite organizations ever…
Seconded. Sidebar?
Sidebar.
For the first time my husband told his parents that his ex boss attempted to rape him (its a she).
Unfortunately they didn’t seem to acknowledge it in any way. (Just sort of continued the conversation as if he hadn’t said anything. Herpity derp.) But I was proud of him for owning it and being willing to say it out loud.
Good for him! 🙂 Best of luck to your husband as he continues to heal.
“warm fuzzies”
Have you been hanging around Less Wrong?
My opinion of someone increases when I find out they read Less Wrong.
I’m a lurker there, yeah. 🙂 There’s a surprisingly high overlap between readers of this blog and readers of Less Wrong…
I’ve posted on Less Wrong for a while.
I know, I’ve seen you in the comments sections.
Suggested, during a moderated discussion about equality at a women’s career seminar, that we should really, really stop setting up women and men as opponents.
*claps*
Excellent! What were they saying?