Have you ever paused to wonder where love truly comes from?
Is it something that you find in another person, something that exists only in fleeting moments of connection and shared vulnerability?
Or could it be something deeper, more elemental — something that flows through us when we are in touch with a hidden wellspring inside, something that has always been there, waiting to be uncovered?
This is the kind of question that, when asked, takes us straight into the heart of what it means to experience love on the deepest levels.
For me, this question also brings to mind the teachings I received from Margot Anand, one of my dear teachers from way back in the day. She had this way of talking about love that didn’t make it seem like this rare, conditional thing that could be found only in the right circumstances or with the right person. Instead, she spoke of it as a current, a flow, that ran through all of us — if we knew how to tune into it.
Margot would say that love isn’t something that comes from others, but rather flows through others. It’s a channel that opens up when we are fully in touch with our own inner wholeness, when we stop trying to get love from the outside world and start becoming the very vessel through which love pours into everything we touch.
But before we dive deeper, let’s take a step back and ask — what does it mean to be “tuned into your own inner wholeness”?
It’s a phrase that can sound a bit airy, like something only mystics or yoga practitioners can wrap their heads around. But the truth is, we all have this potential. And if we are honest, the search for love, the search to be loved, is a search for something much deeper than we often realize. It’s a search for a feeling of completeness that doesn’t come from someone else’s affection or approval, but from our own capacity to be whole, to stand in the fullness of our own being.
Psychologically speaking, the idea of being “whole” is closely tied to the concept of integration, when all the different parts of us, the light and the shadow, the messy and the neat, the beautiful and the broken, come together in a harmonious way.
We begin to feel a sense of inner peace and alignment when we accept ourselves fully, flaws and all. It’s in this space of acceptance, of integration, that we can truly give and receive love without the need for validation, without the need for perfection.
In our world, we’re often taught to seek external validation. We learn that love is something that comes from the outside in; from partners, friends, family, or even from social media likes. But the problem with this is that if love is something that comes from outside of us, we will forever be dependent on others to fill that void. We’ll always be waiting for someone or something to affirm our worth, and it’s exhausting. It can make us feel empty, as though we’re just waiting for a trickle of love to come our way, not knowing how to open the floodgates ourselves.
But what if love is something that flows from the inside out instead?
What if love doesn’t come from people, but instead moves through people when they are deeply rooted in their own sense of self?
What if the deepest form of love is not something we look for, but something we cultivate from within, until it overflows naturally to those around us?
Love is not a commodity; it’s a current of energy, a vibration that can’t be contained.
This is where psychology meets spirituality: when we begin to feel whole within ourselves, we stop looking outside of ourselves to feel loved, and instead, we become magnets for the love that we’ve been carrying within us all along.
This shift is profound. Instead of trying to fill an empty cup, we start pouring from the cup we’ve already filled, and that’s when the real magic happens. When we are whole, we become a beacon, a radiating source of love that extends beyond our own self-interest, beyond our own insecurities, and into the lives of others.
Now, if this all sounds a bit abstract, let’s bring in the wisdom of ancient texts. The Bible’s Song of Solomon is often interpreted as a deep reflection on love, not just in the romantic sense, but in the spiritual and transcendent sense as well. One of the most beautiful lines in the Song of Solomon says, “Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm; for love is as strong as death, jealousy is cruel as the grave: the coals thereof are coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame.” (Song of Solomon 8:6)
When we read this, we see that love is described as something powerful, unyielding, and transformative. It’s not a fragile thing that we can lose with a single misunderstanding or mistake — it’s something as potent and eternal as death itself. Love burns with a “vehement flame,” a fire that is so intense it can’t be contained or diminished. And when we begin to understand that love is not something that comes from the outside, but something that burns within us, then we start to understand the kind of love that is true, unshakable, and pure.
In many ways, this is the kind of love that flows through people when they are aligned with their own inner wholeness. When we are “set as a seal upon our hearts,” when we are whole and grounded, we are not seeking to fill a void. We are simply living from the abundance of love that already exists within us. We become the seal that guards and protects this love, allowing it to flow freely, without fear, and without restriction. The passionate flame of love burns through us, not because we have somehow “earned” it or because we’ve figured out how to “get” it, but because we are living in alignment with the deepest part of who we are.
When we talk about love in this way, it’s not just romantic love, but love in its many forms. The love that connects us to friends, to family, to our communities, and to ourselves.
Love, in its truest form, is boundless.
It doesn’t depend on conditions.
It doesn’t wait for someone to meet us halfway.
It just flows, unbidden and unstoppable, when we are open to it.
So, let me ask you this, have you ever truly tapped into that wellspring of love within you?
Have you ever felt the fullness of your own heart, overflowing with compassion, joy, and connection to all that is around you?
Or have you been chasing love in all the wrong places, waiting for someone else to show up and fill that space for you?
This Valentine’s Day, I invite you to join me in a practice that will help you access that very flow of love — the kind of love that is already within you, waiting to be expressed. In our class, we’ll dive deep into how you can reconnect with your inner wholeness, how you can awaken the love that resides in your own heart, and how you can begin to flow it outward to everyone you encounter.
You are the source.
You are the flame.
And when you realize this, when you embrace your own wholeness, you will never look for love outside of yourself again.
Come and join us, over 200 people have already said yes to this free opportunity.
Let’s start this journey together.
JOIN HERE
https://www.facebook.com/groups/964889938540989
As always loving you from here,
Rene Schooler
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Alexander Krivitskiy on Unsplash
