Your soul is here for its own joy.
- Rumi
“I have a question for you,” I said to my life coach, Rob, the other day.
“Let’s hear it…”
“How do I know whether it’s my soul guiding me,” I asked, “or my ego pushing me?”
“That,” he replied, “is an excellent question!”
“Good,” I said, “because I’m having a heck of a time trying to manage all the tasks that need to get done in a day. I’m really good at prioritizing and getting the most important work done first. But when I start to get tired, I’m not sure whether the little voice pushing me to do more is my soul gently encouraging me to reach my highest potential…or my bullheaded ego trying to turn me into a productivity machine.”
After a good laugh, here was the gist of Rob’s answer:
“The ego loves to use the word ‘should.’ If you hear yourself using the term ‘should’ and/or ‘not enough,’ chances are good that’s your ego trying to run the show. Whereas if you feel excited and enthusiastic about getting started on a project or tackling a task, that is likely soul-driven versus ego-driven.”
“If you feel a positive push to move forward and can’t wait to get started,” Rob continued, “you are likely following the guidance of your soul versus your ego. In contrast, if you feel a sense of dread at the mere thought of doing a task and have to literally force yourself to do it—or repeatedly avoid doing it all—you best pay attention to that.”
The ego, he went on to explain, is all about controlling versus allowing. The ego is pushy, forceful, tends to be negative and is rooted in fear and lack. Whereas the soul communicates in soft whispers and gentle nudges. The soul speaks through positive and encouraging self-talk and is all about abundance. There is enough for all; we are enough…all of us, just as we are.
After our coaching session, I did a bit more digging and found this insightful quote on-line:
Ego vs Soul
Ego seeks to serve itself,
Soul seeks to serve others,
Ego seeks outward recognition,
Soul seeks inner authenticity,
Ego sees life as a competition,
Soul sees life as a gift,
Ego seeks to preserve self,
Soul seeks to preserve others,
Ego looks outward, Soul looks inward,
Ego feels lack, Soul feels abundance
Ego is mortal,
Soul is eternal,
Ego is drawn to lust,
Soul is drawn to love,
Ego seeks wisdom,
Soul is wisdom,
Ego enjoys the prize,
Soul enjoys the journey,
Ego is cause to pain,
Soul is cause of healing,
Ego rejects God,
Soul embraces God,
Ego is me,
Soul is we.
- Anon
Now, when it comes to tackling my daily task list, I do still oscillate between enjoying the journey/process (soul) and just wanting to get the darn thing DONE (ego), so perhaps pushing myself harder than necessary.
And the sheer size of my task list, never mind the complexity of said tasks, suggests that, more often than not, my ego is still running the show much of the time. But what I am paying attention to, far more now, is how I feel when tackling the tasks.
I do the very best I can, each and every day, to reach the goals I have set for myself. But when I am tired, I stop. And I don’t beat myself up for stopping. Rather, I put my feet up (or go for a walk or watch a movie) and pat myself on the back, knowing that my best effort was good enough. Tomorrow is a new day.
How about you? Is it your soul—or ego—in the driver’s seat? Or do they take turns at the wheel?
As I wrote about in last week’s blog, “Accountability 101 – Who Are You Accountable To?” working with a life coach has been a real game-changer for me. If you are interested in possibly working with Rob, here is his contact info: [email protected].
—
