Top 10 Most Attractive Traits in a Man

Physical attraction is important in a relationship — you won’t get far if you can’t stand the thought of him kissing and touching you.

But surface-level physical attraction fades or builds as you get to know the person behind the picture-perfect / face only a mother would love looks.

For example, there’s one guy who uses our motorbike garage. The first time I saw him, I noticed only his physical features, which were challenging to see past — he’s not blessed with features that are easy on the eye.

However, after a few visits, he’d taken on a whole new appearance from my perspective. My husband and stepson can’t understand why I now find him attractive.

I can totally understand it. Attraction goes a lot deeper than surface appearance.

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Sense of humour

Let’s get this yawn-worthy one out of the way. I know it’s a cliché. But it’s true. You can laugh someone into your arms, bed and life.

Someone who can engage in some banter, tell entertaining stories, and have that cheeky glint in their eye.

The only catch is you’ve got to share the same sense of humour.

Values

They have them, and they stick to them. They know what is important to them and will put these things first.

This level of self-assurance also enables them to be respectful and mindful of others’ values, giving their partners the space to openly be themselves.

Don’t we all want to be with someone who we feel comfortable being ourselves around?

Not taking any shit

My husband will do almost anything for me — my happiness is one of his top priorities. But that doesn’t mean I can walk all over him. If he’s had enough, he will say so. If I take advantage, he will tell me.

He’s an easy-going guy that will help anyone out. But he knows his boundaries and is not afraid to enforce them or say no when someone pushes him too far. So sexy!

Not afraid to show their feelings

This supposedly feminine trait makes a man even more masculine.

Being able to express their feelings is a sign of emotional maturity. As much as many people love those baby-faced looks, emotional immaturity is a turn-off.

Showing vulnerability enhances the connection between two people and aids understanding.

They don’t take themselves too seriously

We all trip over, fart, mess things up and can look absolutely atrocious. We all have our imperfections, weaknesses and insecurities.

Someone that can laugh at themselves and isn’t afraid to look silly isn’t holding anything back. They make you feel comfortable when you are around them, which allows you to let your own inner weirdness out.

We all want to spend time with these sorts of people.

They show an interest

Playing hard-to-get is only attractive to other players. So if you want a game player, go ahead and play the game.

But being stand-offish, “mysterious”, and non-committal is not attractive to anyone else.

People want to be desired and to know where they stand.

Showing interest can be carried out in a non-creepy, non-stalker way. It can make the recipient feel flattered and worthy of attention.

Confidence

Not arrogance, of which there is a fine line.

A confident person will treat themselves with the same high level of respect they treat others. They don’t need to tear anyone down to feel good about themselves or shout about how great they are.

They can take no for an answer and move on.

They comfortably voice their wants and needs, so you always know where you’re at with them.

Self-confidence is extremely attractive, so stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, smile and be your true self — that is always the best version of yourself you can be.

Competence

Watching a man at work can be such a turn-on!

Whether at their job, doing something they love, tackling something new or communicating easily with others.

They are in control; they know what they are doing and focus on the job.

When someone is confident in their own ability, it gives them a powerful presence. It doesn’t matter what they are doing. The competence they display proves they’re a man that can.

Being a gentleman

We’ve come a long way from the male and female roles of decades gone by, but we shouldn’t forget that many “gentlemanly” acts are purely about being respectful and attentive to the person you are with.

I am aware that my dad, at age 74, is still a complete charmer. At my 50th birthday party, I went outside to find a group of my friends completely enamoured with him.

He makes any woman he talks to feel special by being attentive and curious. He gives them a lot of compliments, which he truly means because he sees the beauty in everyone. He pulls out chairs, gives them his jacket, and opens the doors.

My husband will never let me walk on the road side of the pavement or walk in front of me. This may seem completely archaic, but it makes me feel cherished.

Good in bed

Now I get this is a tough ask, and I can’t go into details about what “good in bed” means because it differs within every couple.

It boils down to being an attentive lover who can read cues and go with the flow rather than just give someone a good banging! Although there may be a time and place for that too. Being confident enough to take charge as well as relax and receive covers most scenarios.

This one is a bit of a conundrum, as it’s hard to get to the point where you can show off your bedroom skills without first passing the physical attraction stage. Well-timed, confident flirting can get the anticipation of a good shag going.

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Come on, guys. This is a long list of things you can work on that have nothing to do with the looks and body you were given. You are so much more than that!

If you are searching for the person of your dreams, don’t be afraid to do a bit of “punching”, but remember, looks only go skin-deep!

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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