
There’s nothing wrong with saying “no”.
We know what we want and what we don’t want, and with the huge variety of options that exist, we are very sure of what we prefer and what we are not interested in.
Choices play an important role in our lives. They are always present, from the moment we wake up and have breakfast to the things we do before bed.
But it’s not about what we do that I want to talk about. The most important decisions we make are not our actions, but our thoughts.
There are people out there who do what they think is right, but who have probably never really thought about whether it was what they wanted.
With the pressure of society to be accepted in the groups in which we are contextualized (school, work, family, friends, etc.), accepting is almost mandatory.
Those people who say no are considered to be boring, annoying, without the will to make an effort to fit in with the group.
If there is a school activity and you don’t want to go because you don’t get along with your classmates, and you say no, people insist that you go. This happened to me throughout my time at school. For me, school was hell, a prison that I had to share with people I hated and with whom I had not formed any kind of bond.
Even so, when there was something outside of class time and the teachers told me that “it wasn’t mandatory”, I would say I wasn’t going and everyone would get upset, even though they knew that I didn’t fit in with that kind of occasion, or with those people.
We are NOT obliged to be with people we don’t like!
All my life I’ve heard from everyone: oh, in life you have to deal with people you don’t like and do things you don’t like.
But why? Who said that life is that?!
We do what we feel we want to do. If we impose rules on ourselves in our heads such as: I have to fit in, I need to form bonds with this person I don’t like to get ahead in life, I’m going to this event because I always have to be present so as not to be frowned upon… we imprison ourselves.
If you imprison yourself, of course you live in a prison. Your emotions reflect your thoughts, which are mere repetitions of what you have heard all your life and that you try to live, because living properly brings happiness (or not).
But, if you have the audacity to look at yourself, to think about what really serves you at this moment, you can distinguish exactly what lifts you up and what brings you down.
False or toxic people have no place in your life. When it comes to an environment you like to be in, with the rare exception of those annoying people being there BY CHANCE, it’s different — you should focus on what you like, not what you don’t like. However, if you force yourself to be in a place where you feel defeated, bored and overwhelmed, forget it.
Go do something else, make up an excuse, but above all decide to say NO! No to what you don’t want, what you don’t need, what doesn’t add anything to you!
First, the garbage is naturally eliminated. Then, by prioritizing what you like and what you want, you acquire the ability to be unconditional — wherever you are, you are fine, because you know that is where you want to be at that moment.
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© 2024 Lost in My Soul
Thanks for reading my article! Join my email list for exclusive spiritual insights from my soul to yours. Images kindly created to Lost in My Soul by Filipa Kinomoto with Midjourney.
Light and Love from my Soul to Yours! 🤍
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Created to Lost in My Soul by Filipa Kinomoto with Midjourney





