Hours after the news broke that Brad and Angelina were splitting up the rumors began to fly about what a bad person Brad is. He’s being investigated for abuse of some sort. He certainly drinks too much. Maybe Angelina drew first blood to get the upper hand with the media circus that’s sure to follow them every step of the way.
Contrast this with the almost reverent timbre of Chris Martin and Gweneth as they split with all the best intentions and best wishes for each other. Perhaps Pitt and Jolie were more in the spotlight, while Martin and Paltrow chose a more private celebrity. But let’s get one thing clear, these are celebrity lives, celebrity kids, and celebrity divorces, they bear little or no resemblance to the relationships you and I have. The wickedness of the media, however is sure to amplify every detail of their relationship, and begin immediate digging into video, tweets, instagram pics of their recent past to try and get to the “reason” behind the divorce.
Everyone wants a reason for #brangelexit. We, the inquiring minds, want to know what’s going to happen to all those kids? We want to know why they are getting a divorce, after all they have going for them. But the media is not interested in the human side of the story, the media is not going to protect the young lives in the crosshairs, the media is now on 24/7 watch for them, to see how they are holding up.
Divorce is messy business. Even Brad and Angelina bleed and cry. And this is a moment for quiet reflection and reconciliation, not hype, innuendo, and insinuation. But what do you expect from TMZ? They are paid to get eyeballs on the screens, they are paid by the advertisers who want to get to the bottom of the story. The physiologists are already being paraded on Fox News and other networks to discuss Brad’s issues. And for some reason it’s usually the dad who has to take the fall for the failing relationship.
Was Brad an alcoholic? Did the incident on the private jet point to child abuse, or indecency? Oh my goodness, the details are too juicy to wait for. It’s better than a movie divorce, this one is for keeps folks. What the media says about them will not go away, even if it won’t hold up in a court of law either. And here’s the rub in today’s divorce climate.
Brad is going to get limited time with his kids. Brad will likely be strapped with a huge alimony payment. (Who’s going to pay for the kids and the fancy houses, while Angelina is out of work?) And in order to get this WIN in place, Angelina has to strike first blood and get out in front of the story in the media.
If you look at Chris and Gweneth’s breakup, they kept the details secret. We hardly knew they were married with natural children between them. And when they split they did it on joint terms, terms that were good for all parties involved. And we can hope that the Brad and Angelina split is not going to be about money. Surely they both have enough money, right?
Dad has got to be to blame. Of all the stories you’ve heard so far, has any fault be put in Angelina’s lap? My guess is, what you’ve heard is much like this.
She filed for divorce, citing irreconcilable differences. There seems to be a recent incident on a private plan involving one of their sons. Brad has been known to drink to much and recently has been seen exhibiting more serious alcoholic tendencies.
It doesn’t have to go like this, although the media would really like you to tune in for the sordid details. So out we come with the daggars and lies. Let’s roll back the video surveillance tapes and see if we can catch Brad in the act of being a bad dad. Certainly the saint, Angelina is not to blame. And those poor kids, what’s going to happen to those poor kids. They really need their mother at a time like this. Maybe Brad can check into treatment somewhere and then get back to work so he can pay for all the legal fees and alimony awards that are about to garner his paycheck.
Divorce is not pretty. It is most likely the fault of both parents. And in the media/hollywood spotlight its is always about “who’s to blame,” and that typically falls on the dad. Shame that we can’t let Brad and Angelina work out the details of their divorce in private, but I guess you can say they chose to be movie stars, so I guess it’s all fair game. The lopsided court system that always favors the mom, however, that is on display from the first hint of of divorce, celebrity or garden variety, just like you and me.
I hope for peace for Brad and Angelina and their children. And I hope for privacy from the spotlights that are being shined down on their estate from the black helicopters circling the fray, searching for blood in the water.
Back to Positive Divorce and Coparenting
- The Transformation of Parenting in Marriage and Divorce
- Positive Divorce: From Blame To Forgiveness
- Love Is a Choice Not a Feeling: Reflecting On My Divorce
- Durable Love: Forgiving Your Ex and Refinding Love
image: Brad/Angelina and Kids, creative commons usage