What fathers had to say on Twitter this week.
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Hilarious, ironic, charming, moving tweets from fathers. Here’s what has been said about fatherhood’s fantastic adventure this week.
Me: Knock knock. My 5yo: Who’s there? Me: Freep. 5yo: Freep what? Me: What? 5yo: What? Me: Do you know how Knock Knock jokes work? 5yo: No.
— Dan Wells (@TheDanWells) 9 Mars 2014
4yo – begs for a fork tonight instead of a spoon. Me -… 4 – please! Me – *gets fork 4 – *eats with hands
— Fishy Snowboarder (@FishySnowborder) 14 Mars 2014
4yo wanted to play “Planes” so I gave him his breakfast in little plastic dish with his chair pushed against the wall so he had no legroom.
— JC (@JCautomatic) 16 Mars 2014
Me to 4YO: “What state do we live in?” Her: “Texas” Me: “What country?” Her: “Texas” Me: “What planet?” Her: “TEXAS!” pic.twitter.com/jXeSDVJiCs
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— Justice Don Willett (@JusticeWillett) 12 Mars 2014
Was gonna argue w/ a 5yo about brushing her teeth this morning but I decided to do something more productive like piss in the wind instead.
— Babies Daddy (@dshack8) 7 Mars 2014
Me: JUST PUT YOUR SHOES ON 4yo: I DONT WANT TO! Me: JUST PUT THEM ON, THERES ALREADY ENOUGH CONFLICT IN THE WORLD! 4yo: NO THERE ISNT!
— JC (@JCautomatic) 10 Mars 2014
I think I’d rather get burned alive than have to watch my 5yo cry because I hurt her feelings again.
— Rocco™ (@JestersDead74) 5 Mars 2014
5yo: “mummy, do you remember how you made my drink?” Mum: “yes” 5yo: “could you not make it like that again because it was disgusting.”
— Dave Catstrey (@catstrey) 5 Mars 2014
Following a boring lecture from dad about the price of land my 5yo hit on the brainwave of multi-storey stables pic.twitter.com/A6nxanKM04
— Philip Boucher-Hayes (@boucherhayes) 4 Mars 2014
At breakfast my 5yo told me she was perfect. My reply: A perfect person would know that they weren’t perfect. Chew on that one all day punk
— Matt Connors (@MatthewJConnors) 4 Mars 2014
6yo: Dad, this isn’t the best spot in the house for a lightsaber battle, there’s lots of breakable stuff. Me: …. *attacks anyway*
— Ryan (@DarthRyan_) 9 Mars 2014
8yo: It’s not my bedtime [looks @ clock] Me: That clock is wrong. The time changed. 8yo: Don’t be silly. Time can’t change. #wishhewasright
— Greg Hillis (@gregorykhillis) 10 Mars 2014
More bacon, please. -8yo Dude, you ate it all! -Me That is an abomination! -8 ……. -Me You’re right. I don’t know what that means. -8
— MONKology (@CaniacMONK) 1 Mars 2014
I’m going to staple my 3yo down. He has not stopped moving since 8 this morning.
— Matt Hillyer (@bldngnerd) 8 Mars 2014
To this dad dragging his 3YO daughter saying hurry up for everything: Don’t rush. They’ll get too big too fast. That is all
— Saint SuperMatt (@EarthsChairman) 9 Mars 2014
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Last week’s Best Dad Tweets of the Week
Based on an idea from Huffington Post
Photo credit: Flickr/Sharron
I love dad tweets!