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I never imagined being in business would make me a better man. In fact, for most of my life, I’ve looked at business as something dirty.
When I went into business, I had no clue that owning my own company would force me to improve all aspects of myself. For example, being in business made me take a hard look at how little I asked of myself. It also forced me to look at how a decade of nonprofit made me bad at asking for what I wanted.
Owning my own company challenged me in ways I didn’t expect.
Here are three ways that business will challenge you to become better.
1. Set Boundaries.
As a former social worker, I spent a lot of time with people who pushed boundaries. I thought I was great at setting limits with people – little did I know social work made exceptional at being pushed around. As a worker in the service of helping a very needy population – I often let myself do more than I wanted. Sure, it was in the name of helping others, but it also took a lot of energy out of me to work with drug addicts, homeless men and women, and needy teens.
When I went into my own business, I treated my work as if I was still in the nonprofit world. I gave and gave and gave…until one day I realized I was working for very little. If I continued on the same path – I’d soon have to close up shop or sleep on the streets.
To get on track with my business, I had to set boundaries. I realized people will always ask for me. If you don’t set boundaries, you’ll exhaust yourself. As a business owner, I had to learn the art of setting limits.
Before owning my own business I never fully understood how to say, “no more.” Having my company forced me to set boundaries in a way that nothing else in life had before.
This lesson alone made me a better man. It’s trickled into my relationship with my partner, family, and friends. It’s been a defining factor in becoming a better person.
Now that I am better at setting limits, I don’t resent others like I used to. I don’t over-give in the ways I used to. Setting limits has also made me better at recognizing the boundaries of others.
2. Ask for what you want.
In the world of nonprofit and nice guys – it’s hard to ask for what you want. In my case, I’ve often dreaded asking for what I want. The fear of rejection, the anxiety of being turned down, and the shame that might come with asking for too much – kept me from getting what I wanted.
Unfortunately, business doesn’t thrive with an owner who can’t ask for the sale. If you can’t ask for what you’re worth – you’ll end up starving or closing up shop. I didn’t want either.
To make a business that was thriving – I had to learn to ask for exactly what I wanted. It hasn’t
been an easy process. In fact, it’s been grueling. Learning to make specific requests helped me go from barely making it to thriving.
If you want to have what you want, you have to be able to ask for it. No way around it. Being in business will force you to either ask and get it – or starve.
3. Respect others more.
I’ll admit it, as a former social worker, I used to think of myself as being more spiritual. Since I was in the business of helping people – I looked down upon people in sales. I also resented people who made a lot of money.
Going into business forced me to examine my beliefs. By dropping all the negative connotations around money – I became more ok with having more than just enough. Similarly, I found more respect for people who sell to make a living and saw how wealthy people aren’t sick people – but just like anyone they are just humans trying to make a living.
Changing my beliefs about a group of people and profession opened my eyes. It helped me see salesmen in a new light. It shifted my relationship to selling and helped me make a lot more money.
If you have ever considered going into business but felt it might not offer you enough opportunity to become a better human being – I encourage you to think again. Running a company can help you become a better man and help you challenge many core beliefs that hold you back from having the life you truly want.
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Photo credit: Getty Images