(1) Your courage is actually inviting you into patience instead of doing the thing.
Sometimes it is more courageous to not do the thing. To understand the invitation is actually for you to go against the inner and outer “supposed tos” and instead tune in to what is actually yours to live today.
I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve procrastinated in sending an email and then something happens the next few days that would have made my email irrelevant. Sometimes the invitation is to just chill and let things unfold.
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(2) A part of you is resisting the way you’re holding the conversation around doing the thing.
If there’s a part of you that is making doing the thing extremely high stakes (as in, “everything is going to go to shit and I’m going to be totally broke and abandoned if I don’t do this!” or “If I don’t do this, it’s just going to be proof of what a worthless pile I am”) it’s natural to want to resist doing the thing.
Even as you’re pushing the edges of your comfort zone, it’s an important life skill to learn how to lower the stakes for yourself. Some ways to do that are to focus on just what you’re courage is inviting you to do TODAY, keeping it extremely simple, letting your action be 100% ordinary/unimpressive, and simply focusing on taking the action to “move the plot along” instead of worrying about success/failure/results.
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(3) A part of you feels unworthy of taking the action or of the results/visibility that might follow it.
The more your worthiness is on the line, the higher the stakes, the higher the resistance. This is an opportunity to strengthen both your feminine and masculine energy (both energies are needed no matter what your gender).
Strengthen your feminine power by going to the part of you that feels unworthy and giving them the love they’ve always needed. This can be an entire email series in and of itself — I teach you how to do this in Parts Work Academy.
Strengthen your inner masculine by taking yourself by the hand and doing the action you feel unworthy of doing. Your feelings of unworthiness do not have be resolved before you take the action. Taking yourself by the hand in comradery as you do it is an essential part of enjoying the process, though.
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(4) A part of you is afraid of the unknown territory you are walking in to.
Taking action moves the plot along in both your inner and outer worlds. It moves you out from under the comfort of The Devil You Know right into the strange arms of The Devil You Don’t Know. That process is always scary for us humans, ain’t no way around it. Fully living will always feel perilous. But it’s the right kind of peril. The kind that matures you into a truer version of yourself. And, as a part of me put it so eloquently the other day, “What is enlightenment but The Devil You Don’t Know?”
Keep following your courage. Stay in the tough conversation with yourself. And listen for the wisdom your Essence is already telling you.
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(5) It is genuinely too big of a task to expect yourself to do alone.
In our hyper-individualistic culture, we expect way too much of ourselves. I think you will be surprised how much less resistance your parts will have to do scary things when they don’t feel like they are doing them alone and when they know they have the competent support they need to back them up.
Come get that competent support and clarity your parts need to keep living your life courageously. Book a discovery call with me and let’s talk.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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