
Divorce can be devastating.
We’ve all heard the bad news about what happens after divorce. Families are broken. Both partners struggle financially, especially women. Now there are two households to support.
Since it’s so difficult, you wonder why anyone would ever divorce. Yet the truth is this: Divorce can be the best thing that ever happened to you.
Here are 7 ways life is better after divorce:
It gets you away from a toxic person
Let’s face it. You wouldn’t be divorcing someone if everything was going well. Often two immature people rush into marriage without knowing each other. Now they’re shocked when they realize that they’re completely incompatible.
It may have happened to you. Your partner put on this great show when you met them. You were so blinded by the love you didn’t see the real person.
You never realized how irresponsible they were with money until the electricity was shut off. They don’t have your back, and they don’t care.
You may find out too late that your spouse is an alcoholic or is addicted to drugs. You never noticed before when you were gazing at them with your rose-colored glasses.
Or you discover they’re a chronic cheater, and shudder thinking you’ll have to deal with that the rest of your life.
Now you’re married to someone who isn’t the person you fell in love with.
You discover your partner is possessive and jealous. Every time you go out the door you get interrogated. You can’t look at or talk to another person without them becoming furious with you.
An argument turns into a full-blown fight, and they become physically abusive. They’ve become too scary to live with anymore.
Divorce in these cases can save you. It will prevent you from walking on eggshells in your own home. It will protect you from rage and violence. It will save you from an awful life.
Your children are now living in a peaceful home
Research shows divorce can be beneficial. Children from a high conflict home who live in a calmer home after divorce do better. It helps their well-being.
Your children no longer see a role model that disrespects their other parent.
Life is a struggle, but you and your children are now living in a healthy, peaceful home.
You come home to a quiet, peaceful haven, where you can relax and enjoy your family. Even if your home is smaller now, it’s peaceful.
You don’t have to worry about coming home to an angry, abusive person.
And your children no longer have to hide in a closet so they won’t hear their parents fighting.
Everyone has a restful sleep because no angry voices are raging in the night.
You now have a whole bed to yourself
You wake up one morning and realize you finally have a bed to yourself. You can stretch out luxuriously. You don’t have to worry about someone stealing your covers anymore, and waking up freezing.
You get the most peaceful sleep because there’s no more loud snoring to startle you out of your dreams.
You have more room in your closet for all of your things. You don’t have to listen to loud gargling sounds or walk into a stinky bathroom.
You smile when you realize that you no longer have to pick up after your partner. And one of the best feelings is not having to cook when you don’t feel like it.
Being alone is a joy, and it has its perks.
Your children may benefit
Yes, children are upset about a divorce. Some of them may struggle with it more than others.
Yet, the divorce taught them the kind of partner they won’t want for themselves in the future.
They’ll be sure to pick a compatible partner who is the complete opposite of what they grew up with.
The adversity made them strong. And they may get financial aid for college because of their custodial parent’s lowered income.
Children will do much better if their parents maintain healthy communication after the divorce.
They should be able to spend quality time with their noncustodial parent.
Your life takes a new path
After divorce, your entire life changes. You meet new people that have more in common with you. You are open to new experiences.
You reconnect with old friends. Studies show women are happier after divorce.
You decorate your home your way and buy the car you want. You no longer have to clear it with someone else.
You can budget now. Your addicted spouse is no longer there to blow all your money on their alcohol habit.
You travel to places they would never go to. You go out to eat with friends more often. You may sell the family home and move out of state for a new adventure in life.
Life changes. It’s your second chance at life. You can follow your dreams.
It forces you to focus on yourself
Getting divorced forces you to grow. You can’t rely on your partner anymore to take care of you or pay your bills.
You learn to rely on yourself and your higher power. You now are doing the inside and outside maintenance on your home. You use skills that you thought you never had before.
You now have to provide for yourself and your children. You rise to the challenge. Some of you may go back to college to better yourselves.
Soon you’re progressing in your career and your life.
You become braver. You realize you are capable of things you never thought you could do.
Divorce also teaches you about the kind of partner you don’t want in your life anymore. It helps you grow and become more discerning so that you never make the same mistake again.
It frees you to meet the right partner
Now that you’ve let go of the wrong person, you’ve opened the doors to your future. Now there’s room for the right person to come strolling into your life.
You may meet the love of your life. You’ll finally find your compatible person and get the love you deserve.
And you would have never met them if you hadn’t divorced the wrong one.
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism |
Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box |
The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer |
![]() |
—
Photo credit: Drew Colins on Unsplash
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism
Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box
The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer
