Being a Father

FACING THE CHALLENGES OF DAILY GROWTH

The creation of a new life through the act of joining two bodies in intercourse is, as we know, driven by pleasurable sensations. Attraction, desire and acceptance permeate our bodies, feelings and thoughts. We understand this powerful connection, until lost in rapture we disappear and feel complete. At least for awhile.

Sex like all life, can be wonderful. Our responsibility appearing as new life can be elusive and difficult posing the challenge of loving presence.

The cell beeps, email dings, phone chirps, children cry, feeling tired, hungry…… and we move our awareness with choices all day long. Life’s unstoppable commitment to reproduce itself in new form pulls our attention with it, luring us with a promise of better or a threat of worse. As fathers we are called to bring the good through the difficult.

Each moment of existence is made of participation in change. We do this by directing awareness. As we raise children to adulthood, we are here as gatekeepers to direct endless change. That understanding requires disciplined attention and practice of which we’re all capable. What character trait do you value enough to choose it now?

Many men follow a life of pleasure leading away from wife and children to various forms of addiction as they pass up the difficult choice of being peaceful. Accepting this difficulty of ongoing family intimacy calls to all fathers. As life pushes and pulls us into days full of decisions, the growth and difficulties of our own lives requires making family first as a habit of family health.

Do you listen deeply? Are you committed to knowing fully what your family is sharing?

Do you watch your family’s eyes when they speak? Do you know what you feel when you think and act? Do you speak your feelings with compassion?

As parents we are equipped to use our bodies with thoughts and feelings to enhance life’s offerings. Those of us whose fortune has included children are drawn into confusions and difficulties which require the same type of full body, feeling and thought we experience during sex. When we choose full presence, we expand our wisdom and understanding and value to our families.

Yes, being completely present and grateful is available during the worst anger, pain and shame confusion.

Through daily practice of not following racing mind and feelings we may choose to resume full, complete presence. For example using our ears and eyes to fully embrace the lives of our wives and children. Thoughtless, you may see and listen and participate completely, just as during conception. This full connection is ongoing act of creation, raising our children..

You are able to embody complete attention to your children and their mother, with the same joyful acceptance that creates life, because you see, you are life creating. Always

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This post was previously published on The Father Connection.

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From The Good Men Project on Medium

What Does Being in Love and Loving Someone Really Mean?

My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me

The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex

The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence

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